By dr immature - 23/12/2013 23:11 - United States - Washington

Today, I diagnosed a patient with a spastic colon. For some reason, the term "spastic colon" has always amused me, and I burst into uncontrollable laughter as I said it. By the time I managed to stop laughing, my eyes were watering and my patient was visibly angry. FML
I agree, your life sucks 23 405
You deserved it 48 762

Same thing different taste

Top comments

I'm glad to see doctors still find medical terminology childish


I'm glad to see doctors still find medical terminology childish

You know the sad part is that this immature dick still got off lightly, at least we assume so since he's on FML making fun of himself. Imagine if OP diagnosed a guy with testicular cancer. He might just be dick enough to laugh that the guy would lose his balls, maybe even make a quip about replacing them with walnuts. If I was that guy, murder would be my only thought.

\ 28

I used to think Foot-and-Mouth disease meant an uncontrollable tendency to say stupid things

@18, it was an accident. I assume you know what that is, as you are on.

Seems like they let anyone become a "doctor" these days. OP is clearly not remorseful since he is posting it on FML instead of truly being ashamed of himself.

#23 I am what? An accident? The on,y accident I see was the broken condom that resulted in you. And exactly #28. He laughs it off while the guy has a condition. Imagine if he laughed that the guy's wife became a "vegetable". I'd throttle his neck.

*only. Excuse my bad grammar. I think I inherited the same genes as you.

29, though the patient had valid reason to be upset at his doctor laughing, you're taking it a little far. He said he laughs at this one thing, not every diagnosis. I'm sure if he laughed at something like a fatal illness he wouldn't be a doctor, or would tell another doctor to break the news. Perhaps this was the first time he had to tell someone and thought he wouldn't laugh when face to face with a patient, so now he knows for next time. Why are you so angry? Do you have it and your doctor laughed when he told you? Otherwise you shouldn't be so upset by this.

\ 28

Chill out, Ambient25. Your comments are usually better than this

euphoricness 28

Wtf is wrong with you? I sure hope I never have you for a doctor, that's seriously ****** up; I'd be, "visibly angry," too.

You two have ruined a perfectly decent and mildly witty thread. You know who you are. Stop. Hammer time.

Scynistr 20

Really? Can you see past your nose or are you that blind? He's not laughing at the patient. He's not laughing at the diagnostics, nor the symptoms. He laughed t the medical terminology. The name of the diagnosed problem. It's one thing to laugh at a name and a completely different thing to laugh at the patient for being sick. Go back to elementary and learn context.

JMichael 25

This is very contradictory, so here comes the wave of down-votes, but why do we need two (now three) comments on a comment for which a simple up-vote would've sufficed?

Because if we start to put rules on every single thing, it's gonna become such a boring world out there. So he agrees, and he felt like expressing his approval by posting a comment. Maybe it's useless, but let me break it down to you, all of our comments are useless. They might not all be as witty as yours. BIG DEAL. (Sorry, I was just starting to get really annoyed by everyone and their mother thumbing down someone for posting an innocent comment)

StillUsesMyspace 22

I'm glad to see 8 years of school turns the people we trust with our lives into such caring folk.

xChaos 29

I have to agree with your username. That's really immature and clearly not funny to the patient. YDI.

I laughed when I read it.. Is that such a bad thing?

They call it Irritable Bowel Syndrome now, at least here. I prefer to call it spastic colon because it does sound funny.

grgnyce 8

Dude, you're an M.D., act like it.

I usually prefer doctors that can laugh a little. Like the doc who diagnosed me with "being full of shit" when I was constipated because of the painkillers I was taking. His prescription was "drink prune juice until you are squirting purple." Sure it's "unprofessional" but laughing a little over bathroom humor never hurt anyone. Honestly if I was diagnosed with a spastic colon I would probably be laughing with the doctor.

Who knows maybe he thought it stood for major dick and tried to earn his title.

#65 That may be funny to you, but most people want their medical conditions to be taken seriously. Also, there's a difference between joking about constipation and laughing uncontrollably about it.

KB616 11

I agree with you #65. Everybody chill the the **** out. I'd be laughing too, "spastic colon" is a funny term.

then000bster 16

I'd hate to see what happens when he has to say penis, or other immature words.

iLike2Teabag 27

"I'm sorry sir, you have a spastic penis."

I'm not a doctor so I can laugh at that. lol spastic penis

I like to think that he's handle it like Dr. Reid on the tv show Scrubs. "Sir, you have a spastic peep."

StompinOnCrayons 15

I guess OP can never become a gynecologist

AnthonyWheeler15 24

You should probably try to keep it more professional, especially in that kind of situation.

BeforeItWasCool 12

A little professionalism goes a long way. You really deserved this one, it's not difficult to be an adult and control yourself, particularly in your line of work OP.

You might have some spastic fists flying towards our face if you do that again man

Sounds like that colon wasn't the only thing being spastic

luckyone365 7

Douche. I hope you get spastic testicles.

I freakin live it they do e even have to do anything it's way more funny sounding then spastic colon

lilmslady 11

Shhhh ... I think its trying to communicate