Birthday and Kids: Turn of phrase

Turn of phrase

By Anonymous - 07/03/2015 16:59 - Australia - Boya

Today, my son was at a birthday party. After eating a plate of cake, he loudly asked the birthday boy's mum if he could have sloppy seconds. I don't know where he heard that phrase, but the other kids' parents shot me very dirty looks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 022

You deserved it 3 305

Christmas: Snowy Joys and Blunders
Enjoy Christmas stories where unexpected gifts and family reunions create lasting memories... and fun! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Reported

By maximumpower - 15/03/2009 01:46 - United States

Today, I was eating at a restaurant in town, when a small boy started looking at me. I simply smiled and went back to eating, only to hear out of the corner of my ear, "Daddy, why does that kid's face look like that"? He said it so loud, the three tables next to us turned and looked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 155

You deserved it 3 524

Highly inappropriate

By Anonymous - 27/05/2013 22:15 - United States - Lehi

Today, my in-laws came for dinner. My 5-year-old son chose that as the perfect time to say, "Good girls always swallow!" when my daughter coughed up some of her food. I have no idea where he heard it, but my mother-in-law blamed me, and my wife had to convince her not to call CPS on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 050

You deserved it 3 752

By stargirl - 19/07/2011 00:36 - Canada

Today, I was at a restaurant with my son when he started to choke on his food. Panicked, I grabbed the closest drink I could reach and made him gulp it down. Only when I received tons of dirty looks from people at other tables did I realize I had given him beer. My son is 8. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 295

You deserved it 13 149

Parroting

By Anonymous - 06/07/2024 00:00 - Australia

Today, my toddler repeated a very inappropriate word I'd said when I'd stubbed my toe. He chose to do this in the middle of a crowded supermarket, loudly, and repeatedly. Now the whole town probably thinks I have questionable parenting skills. FML

I agree, your life sucks 359

You deserved it 208

By Anonymous - 26/01/2012 04:18 - United States

Today, my husband thought it would be "funny" to put laxatives in the cakes for my son's 7th birthday party. Over 40 kids came to the party. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 594

You deserved it 4 113

By bdayboy - 11/01/2011 09:17 - United States

Today, some of my classmates brought cupcakes to celebrate my birthday. I took the leftovers with me after class, and when my mom picked me up from school, she asked, "What are the cupcakes for?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 381

You deserved it 2 843

By shh - 09/10/2015 07:06 - United States - Scottsdale

Today, during dinner with my wife's family, my daughter suddenly yelled, "DADDY TICKLES MOMMY'S BUM BUM!" I don't think I've ever received dirtier glares in my life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 572

You deserved it 2 779

By Jess - 30/05/2009 12:48 - United States

Today, I overheard my 5 year old daughter call a girl in her dance class a slut. Shocked, I asked her where she heard that word. Her response: "I heard you and Daddy say it about her Mommy." FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 369

You deserved it 71 864

By Anonymous - 01/05/2015 20:41 - United Kingdom - Oundle

Today, in the middle of the supermarket, my 7 year old son asked me what a cocksucker is and why his mum always calls me that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 387

You deserved it 3 651

By PiZzA_FaCe - 29/05/2009 21:09 - United States

Today, I was working at a day care center. A 5 year old boy came up to me telling me he wanted to eat my face. Confused, I asked him why. He said, "Because your face looks like pizza." FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 337

You deserved it 5 279

denaeb123 24

Sunday 8 March 2015 5:18

Has he watched the parent trap? I'm almost 100% sure that phrase is in there during the sloppy joe scene

Destinee_1 13

Sunday 8 March 2015 5:26

This kids starting early.

Comments

xapocxbiggunx 4

Sunday 8 March 2015 5:16

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡° ) mmmmm

BananaN0se 13

Sunday 8 March 2015 5:17

He just wants to eat someone else's piece because there was none left

captain_mal 19

Sunday 8 March 2015 5:46

I think it's pretty obvious that he wasn't asking for the true meaning of "sloppy seconds"...

denaeb123 24

Sunday 8 March 2015 5:18

Has he watched the parent trap? I'm almost 100% sure that phrase is in there during the sloppy joe scene

grajax 24

Sunday 8 March 2015 6:33

It is.

satanic_fml 13

Sunday 8 March 2015 5:18

well, did he get the sloppy seconds?

donkinator 24

Sunday 8 March 2015 5:18

maybe it was a very moist cake?

SPFINATOR1993 10

Tuesday 10 March 2015 8:35

Better than a fuzzy pie.

Jake42100 17

Sunday 8 March 2015 5:19

Im sorry,But this was very funny....

ProfessorMctitie 20

Sunday 8 March 2015 5:20

Everybody wants them sloppy seconds at some point... maybe

onlychildFTW 33

Monday 9 March 2015 8:54

Uh, no thanks, I'll pass.

thatguy3812 25

Tuesday 12 January 2016 6:05

I think you're using the word everybody very loosely here....

SueAnn23 8

Sunday 8 March 2015 5:21

I'm thinking your husband or EX needs to explain...

FluffyPandas156 13

Sunday 8 March 2015 5:33

Or know if the kid hears it at school, can't always assume the husband is teaching the kid that. And quit with the "ex" that example has been used too much.