Today, while talking to a friend, I momentarily forgot the word... - FML

By blonde moment - 23/06/2019 14:23

Today, while talking to a friend, I momentarily forgot the word for archery and instead called it, “Bow-and-Arrow Jutsu.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 225

You deserved it 551

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 04/11/2012 00:19 - Canada - Hamilton

Today, at archery practice, I jokingly said that I'd kiss the next person to get a bullseye. They all made a point of missing their targets, some even shooting their arrows way off to the side. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 938

You deserved it 7 979

By arrow - 23/02/2016 20:39 - United States - Pomona

Today, the officers of my archery club forgot to check if anybody was behind the targets looking for arrows. I got hit in the leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 644

You deserved it 2 008

By lexiiiiiiweee - 19/02/2010 22:00 - United States

Today, I went bowling with my friends. As I was about to take my turn, my friend came up behind me and yelled in my ear, "Don't mess up!" Startled, I dropped the ball on my foot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 660

You deserved it 3 826

Ballshot

By Anonymous - 02/12/2022 14:00

Today, I shot my boyfriend in the balls by mistake, twice. First it was a paintball gun I was using with my nephew, then it was a slingshot I use to scare away the bird who keeps eating fish from my pond. He is now sat icing his groin acting like I did it on purpose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 294

You deserved it 962

By BCBUDDY - 07/05/2011 15:29 - United States

Today, while I was trying to explain to my friend how smoking weed everyday doesn't make you stupid, I forgot what I was talking about mid-sentence. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 433

You deserved it 91 853

Right in the miniature tree

By Anonymous - 31/01/2017 16:41 - Netherlands - Veldhoven

Today, my parents got mad at me because I laughed when they called the bullseye "bonsai" while watching darts. They've always thought it was bonsai. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 564

You deserved it 486

By Anonymous - 17/01/2017 14:06

Today, in physics class, my teacher was messing around with an air cannon and I accidentally blurted out, "Blow me!" It took me all of 5 seconds to realize why everyone was laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 748

You deserved it 1 631

By ke - 29/01/2010 05:10 - United States

Today, I did something clever at work and I was telling one of the other girls about it. I said "Just using my noodle" and went to tap my temple but instead I jabbed myself in the eye. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 852

You deserved it 30 855

Don't panic!

By Anonymous - 19/07/2023 15:00

Today, I had a meeting with our partner company from Japan. I was instructed beforehand on bowing but when the time came I panicked, stood way too close, and headbutted their boss in the boobs. I was “politely” asked to leave the meeting. I’m so embarrassed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 450

You deserved it 730

Are you OK?

By Anonymous - 06/11/2023 15:00

Today, while thinking about something cringe I did, I accidentally said, "Oh fuck!" aloud during someone's speech. The room besides me and the speaker was otherwise quiet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 126

You deserved it 564

Next

Top comments

Yudith 24

Sunday 23 June 2019 15:47

From now on, I will always call archery "Bow-and-Arrow Jutsu".

MidnaLink 33

Sunday 23 June 2019 16:46

You. I like you.

Comments

Yudith 24

Sunday 23 June 2019 15:47

From now on, I will always call archery "Bow-and-Arrow Jutsu".

MidnaLink 33

Sunday 23 June 2019 16:46

You. I like you.

RichardPencil 30

Sunday 23 June 2019 17:33

I call it Hunger Games Guns

TxKitten79 10

Sunday 23 June 2019 20:41

Stuff like that happens to me. Ince my husband or friends laughingly give me the right word, I just say, "Yes! Thank you. Words hard."

Chris Cowperthwait 4

Monday 24 June 2019 2:56

fun fact a master of archery is referred to as a toxophilite

alycion 38

Monday 24 June 2019 11:08

I’m laughing so hard. With my concussion my word loss is worse than normal from my meds. I’ve been coming up with good ones. But you have topped them all. Take a bow.

Jonkbaby 22

Tuesday 25 June 2019 10:06

that is so adorable

INDYSTRUCTABLE 43

Thursday 27 June 2019 4:50

this doesnt even make sense!

Jjjjjjjam24 3

Wednesday 10 July 2019 4:07

Weeb

Maks Lesniewski 7

Thursday 12 December 2019 8:35

As a die-hard Naruto fan, I laughed at this so hard!

Keywords

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The Top

Today, my mother, who thinks I'm a virgin, called me while I was having sex with my boyfriend. I have to answer every time she calls or she freaks out. I ended the conversation quickly and hung up. Or so I thought. She listened in to the rest of our 20-minute lovemaking session, and I have some explaining to do. FML

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Today, my little sister complained about a young boy in her class always pulling her hair. She asked when boys will stop doing it. My mom replied, "They won't, even when they're grown-ups," then looked over at my dad and shared a dirty smirk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 735

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Today, while at work taking notes on a pad of paper, my boss witnessed me trying to scroll down on the paper, as if it was a touch-screen phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 894

You deserved it 30 784

Today, a customer gave me the dirtiest look ever and muttered, "Goody two-shoes prick" after I asked if he'd like to donate a few cents to charity. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 639

You deserved it 1 833

Today, I was at my boyfriend's house. We were starting to get intimate, and I thought it would be kinky to tie his hands to his bed so he'd be more turned on. Suddenly his mom called us for dinner, but I couldn't untie him fast enough. I had to sit there, embarrassed, while his mom undid the rope. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 108

You deserved it 29 771

Today, I took my daughter to the library instead of the pool. I sat her on the counter and, while I reached for my library card, she turned to the librarian and said, "We didn't go to the pool today because Mum has hairy legs." FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 668

You deserved it 13 481