Today, while I was watching Miley Cyrus's new music video, I had an itch near my bikini line that I couldn't reach through my jeans. So I unzipped my pants to get to it, and that's when my boyfriend walked in on me with my hands down my pants. He thought I was getting off on the music video. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, me and my girlfriend were getting at it, and then my parents came home. I heard them and we scrambled to get our clothes on. My dad came into the room and found me wearing her pants inside out with her thong around my legs. FML
Today, at work, I wet my pants. I had to throw my tighty-whities away. Since I didn't have underwear on, I chafed real bad and got a rash on my butthole and near my balls. I had to push my boyfriend off of me, all because it hurt too much to touch. FML
Today, I got some really bad mosquito bites on the outside of my thighs. They itched, and my jeans prevented me from scratching them, so I unbuttoned my pants, stuck my down my leg and started scratching. My mom walked in, and won't believe I wasn't masturbating. FML
Today, I was so inexplicably horny that I had to shuffle awkwardly and use my bag to hide the wetness of my pants as I left work for the day. FML
Today, I was making out with my girlfriend, and things started getting pretty hot. That is, until I tried to remove her shirt. Somehow, I managed to grab her pajama shorts and give her a violent wedgie. FML
Today, I was watching a movie in the basement with my boyfriend when we started to get a little frisky. My mom walks down with dirty laundry and tells him to stop it because I'm creaming all over my undies. She showed him a pair of dirty ones to prove it. FML
Today, my girlfriend text me and told me to do something sexy because she was going to FaceTime me. I eagerly dropped my pants and started stroking it to get ready for her. As soon as I opened her call, she was standing with my wife. I literally got caught with my dick in my hand. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were messing around. When he slipped his hand down my pants, he scratched my pubic hair and said "scruffy, scruffy, scruffy." FML
Today, I walked in on my boyfriend getting it on with the neighbour's daughter. As soon as he saw me, he started singing "It Wasn't Me" by Shaggy, completely naked, still sitting with the girl. FML
Today, I was taking a shower outside at my fiancé's beach house. I was struggling to take my bikini bottoms off, so I started to walk backwards to step out of it. Little did I know that I had pushed the door open. My fiancé, his family, and my family all saw me bend over naked. FML
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Top comments
Lisimal 7
EWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!! YDI for even looking at that beaver face.
ladycoyote 0
You deserve it for voluntarily watching Miley Cyrus do anything.
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Comments (228)
cLaAaNdEsTiNe 0
AHAHAHAHA LMFAO! ydi for listening to that awful music!
reidcamphor 0
the music video gave you a pubic itch because you're receiving an std just choosing to watch her video. Watching miley cyrus is like actively having sex with a hobo. During and after, you get a nasty itch! The doctor would prob prescribe you sustain from watching slutty hillbillies for a time period of FOREVER.
nicole1123 0
LOL. thats hilarious! but sooo true =D
mwbddh2 0
that is damn sexy!
Jacks_Penguin 0
YDI for getting off to Miley Cyrus.
plexico 4
Were you just masturbating to the thought of you and Miley together, or were you imagining a three-way with you, Miley AND Hannah Montana? I do the latter even though it is actually impossible, but only slightly more impossible than me getting with Miley. Actually the deal-breaker with Miley would be having to do the Achy-Breaky at our wedding.
curryndricegirll 0
ahahaha! "threesome with you Miley and Hannah" FTW!
the_deuce 0
LMFAO that is sooo funny!!!!
ethanmonroe 0
YDI because you like Miley Cyrus.
DyingMuffin 0
lol I found out about this website because of Shane and niw its one of my favorites
Alyssaraeconmay 5
Well thats lovely, lol
nicole1123 0
lol. same here =D