By kinkicali - 20/11/2012 08:43 - United States - Maple Valley

Spicy
Today, trying to be kinky while giving my boyfriend a blow job, I whipped him with my ponytail. He was thrilled, until I accidentally head-butted his dick. He curled up into a ball and wouldn't let me touch him again. FML
I agree, your life sucks 16 450
You deserved it 36 376

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Top comments

Double meaning to giving head!

Well I wouldn't take it personally, that kinda pain can make the toughest man cry.

Comments

Oh my God. I just died a little.

Keep it CUMMING.

36- You tried too hard. Let it cum naturally.

Cum on guys, I don't get it. Explain it better.

It isn't hard to explain, but I can only give you a tip on how to finish figuring it out on your own. Just keep pushing forward until you get stuck, back track and try pushing forward again and repeat until it finally cums to you.

84- Good explanation! Sometimes you just gotta make it a quickie, if you want it to cum to you that badly.

Very nice! Thank you for explaining!

I'm going to get a good grade in biology. :)

Did you hear a pop noise?

*cringe* ooowwwww.

That's only if her ear-ring got caught in/on it.

28 - Sometimes I think "pun" is your native tongue :)

As much as I like the idea of that, this one was not actually a pun, unless you are referring to another comment, in which case I stand corrected.

I just grabbed my dick with the known feeling of a popping one.. Thank you for this..

What would a pop mean down there? Broken dick lol???

U can't break ur dick u idiot!!

I beg to differ 97.

You can sprain your penis 97 . When bored you find weird stuff on the Internet.

Yeah, I can pop mine like a knuckle. And you can actually break a boner, despite the fact that it's just blood. -- The sac membranes can burst in the shaft and muscular damage can occur to the extent of it "bending" in half. Also, if an erect penis is bitten and punctured, it literally explodes. Just a fun cock fact for you guys. Thank me later

110- I can already feel the pain!

Actually you can, idiot, look it up.

Well at least you tried.

Well.. OP should have thought twice before giving him head...

You.. are retarded.

Well I wouldn't take it personally, that kinda pain can make the toughest man cry.

Like Saxton Hale.

Yes. He's going to be mad at you for a while. Don't take it personally, it's just the natural consequences of your actions. I'm sure that if you can convince him it was an accident, you'll be free to headbutt his penis again.

Ikr? I gently got tapped there today by someone and it hurt like a bitch

Apologize by having make up sex. Best thing to do. ;)

Headbutt critical stike!

Super effective!

Does it really hurt that bad?

I do hope you apologized. I also hope you sort it out. Sexual related injuries are never fun. Mostly...

Double meaning to giving head!

More like a new meaning to "giving head" lol

unknown_user5566 26

Looks like someone needs to reread 50 Shades of Grey. You're clearly supposed to use a whip or riding crop, OP. That's where you went wrong.

At least this way her BF can still say he got tail.

unknown_user5566 26

14- This is true, it's just too bad there was a kink in OP's plans. She should keep her head up and try again, so her boyfriend isn't left feeling blue.

Damn, I can tell when I've been outdone. At a glans, I can see that your puns are better on this one. I guess I dropped the ball on this one! That's all she sc-rote!

* lights 50 Shades of Gray on fire. turns on porn* its ok I got rid of it. * turns on porn* watch and learn how to give head

If you base your relationship advice/thought process off of porn, then you need to get out more.

That sucks.

OP put this on FML for a reason

I think it was supposed to be a pun...

I'm glad someone got it...

I never heard of anyone getting laid off from a blow job. This IS a tough economy!

Not true I get laid off all the time after a blow if you know what I mean. Wink wink nudge nudge.

I cringed at the thought of that >< Make him feel better !