Today, the highlight of my day was when I figured out that my little brother's toy dump truck could actually dump stuff out. I'm 18. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Same thing different taste
Today, my baby brother learned to remove his nappy. He immediately used this new skill to shit all over my room. FML
Today, I was summoned to the bathroom by my three-year-old, who still needs help cleaning up sometimes. When I walked in, he looked so happy and proud as he pointed to the trash can saying, "Look at my big poop!". Buying a new trash can tomorrow. FML
Today, I made my first snowman ever, and then cried when my big brother kicked it to pieces. I'm 27. FML
Today, I found out that my little brother has been rubbing my toothbrush in dog shit for the last month because I accidentally broke one of his toys. FML
Today, I dropped my trash into what I thought was a garbage can. My co-workers stared at me like I had just pissed myself. It was a toy collection box for children in foster care. FML
Simple pleasures
Today, at work, I overrode the limit on my forklift, allowing me to carry four pallets instead of two. Then I was able to place them all within a ten-foot radius, giving a massive boost to my efficiency. My excitement faded when I realized that was actually the high point of my day/week/month. FML
Bought or stolen
Today, when leaving my apartment, I instantly noticed there was a giant dump truck in our lot, which turned out to be directly behind my car. After making a 20-point escape from my parking space and getting to work late, my roommate texts me, "DUDE guess what I got last night." A giant dump truck. FML
Today, at work, I had to help a teenager who was stuck in a toy car for kids, and no, it was not in one piece when she finally got out. FML
Good job
Today, the little boy I nanny for finally stood up and went 'pee-pee on the potty'. I started cheering and clapping, making a big deal out of it. I flushed while he smiled proudly and pooped on the floor. FML
Today, trying to do something nice for my brother, I filled up his truck's gas tank. I didn't realize until too late that it's a diesel. FML
Top comments
HKCgrimmjow 15
There's nothing wrong with being a child at heart!
Nolimit2217 32
You need a girlfriend, boyfriend or hobby in your life ASAP!
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Comments (82)
TheCrispyCat 20
That's awesome!
molliciousj 19
I don't see what's wrong with that. I think all adults should satisfy the kid in them ever now and then.
awilliams44 9
I have those problems to..
EvilLittleMan 23
Aw OP, it's OK. You still can be Bob the Builder. Just do what Barney says and use your imagination.
beastwill64 16
Well it's Super Bowl night.
stephiijo 15
Whatever, that ***** amazing!
rockhead1270 5
Maybe your an engineer. Or limited in brain activity...
MurphyGallagher 18
Tip... Read The Book of Awesome, will show you that even the tiniest things in life can be awesome and keeps you optimistic about life. Even on those FML days.
it__happens 17
It's sad you must make fun of yourself to get published..
yorkie_16 15
Yay for same name :)