Today, the girl I like sent me a Facebook message telling me how the message I left on her phone was one of the funniest drunk dials she's ever gotten. I'm debating whether or not I should tell her that I don't drink. FML
Collection
Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Same thing different taste
Assumptions
Today, I told my crush that I liked her a lot. She told me not to message her when I'm drunk. FML
Boring
Today, after drunk texting a girl the night before, I sent her a message saying I was sorry for everything I said. All she could say back? "Those were some of the most normal drunk texts I have ever read. I'd hate to see how boring you'd be sober." FML
Party animal
Today, I got this beautiful girl's number at a bar. After the night was over, I was pretty drunk and sent too many drunk Snapchats. When I'd sobered up, I deleted them. She asked why I deleted them, so I said because I was drunk and didn't remember what I sent. She hasn't messaged me back since. FML
Today, I received a drunken prank call from a girl I didn't know around 1am. I don't know what's sadder, that I carried out the conversation for 30 minutes, or that this was the first girl to call me in over a year. FML
Let down
Today, I was texting this guy that I really liked. Things were going pretty well. I got a call from his number and excitedly answered it. It was his girlfriend asking if he was bothering me because he likes to text random people when he's drunk. FML
Girl…
Today, I got a text message. It said, "I'm so drunk. What you up to, girl?" It was my dad. FML
Who'll tell him?
Today, the girl I like said she was out drinking with a friend. I'm pretty sure she has been lying about all the times she has "fallen asleep" and could not talk, and is actually seeing other people. FML
The hangover from hell
Today, slightly drunk from a head-frazzle of a night out from hell, I sent a text meant for my friend recounting the terrible date I'd just been on… to the date himself. He replied with, "I know, right?" FML
Today, I realized that the only time my girlfriend ever calls me is when she's drunk. FML
Today, I sent a message on Facebook to a girl I really like. She replied, "..." It took me three hours to realize she'd actually written it. I thought it was just Facebook telling me she was typing. FML
Top comments
ks0300 0
that is ******* hilarious. You just made my day
Golden_massimo 0
just think how funny you are drunk
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Comments (103)
my2centsworth 15
Don't tell her. She already knows; she's trying to give you an out.
smr167 6
tru dat
Kingfmltrust 0
dumb
mattm211 0
you should drink
Spierdalaj 7
What does it mean when people say comment moderated and why does everyone hate it? :s
Arsonnist 3
Comment moderated. I hate saying that. Why do I keep doing it?
ch111 0
well honesty is like a ring of fire it is likely she will find out but you may as well not tell her and hope to get thourgh the hoop or just be honset and don't risk the jump. girls hate liars.
Doortje 30
don't tell her!
spiderbesideher 0
so what
me_is_lala 2
lol I'd just play along
ch111 0
to simplfy my comment sonner or later your f&&@cked
TheyCallMeThumpe_fml 0
dont do it just tell he playfulky that people are most true when their drunk ;;)
shadyecko 0
The fail whale called, he isn't happy with you stealing his fail.
TheyCallMeThumpe_fml 0
tell the Fail Whale to suck it cuz i turned the Fail into a Win!!! i side with the Win Wallabe