Today, thanks to some asswipe drunk driver fleeing the cops the wrong way down a one-way street, I've now had my third wreck this year. My insurance premium's now higher than Bob Marley in a weed factory. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, after my car got stolen and flipped on its roof three months ago, making it an insurance write-off, and getting a new car a week ago, a drunk driver crashed into my parked car, writing it off. In both instances the drivers were thankfully OK, it's just my insurance premiums skyrocketing, no biggie. FML
Today, after 2 years of paying off the insurance fees after an accident, I got rear-ended. It was the same driver who crashed into me the first time. FML
Today, a drunk driver crashed in through my living room wall. Not only that, but he managed to completely miss the first two houses on the block, which should have been a barrier before mine. FML
Today, I woke up to find the entire driver's side of my car wrecked. Front door, back door, front and rear bumper smashed to shit. A drunk driver had hit it the previous night and ran. Don't worry though, he stopped and left his insurance information. He keyed it into the undamaged side of my car. FML
Today, I finally removed my car insurance after realizing it costs too much money. Since I then had more money, I went to celebrate with ice cream. On the way, I got hit by a truck. FML
Today, for the 2nd time in a month, I've been rear-ended at a stop light. One insurance company refuses to pay because of prior damage from the 1st accident, and the other won't pay because of new damage not caused by their client. I just want my car back. FML
Today, while driving to work, some asshole stopped sharply on the 60 mph highway because he almost hit the car in front of him. Even with maintaining my distance, and slamming on the brakes, I still ruined the front end of my car on his dented bumper. I haven't even had the car for a year, and I'm still the one at fault. FML
Today, my husband ran our car into a fence at work. He had to file an insurance claim, with a company we only just got with, and it's going to deplete the rest of our taxes. FML
Today, I accidentally rear-ended an undercover police car. FML
Today, I got into a car crash, in my own garage. FML
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Top comments
onlychildFTW 34
This last accident wasn't your fault so you shouldn't have your rates increased because of it. Fight it. I don't know about your other 2 so can't comment on those.
poppunkette 22
How the hell can you have 3 accidents in one year? But yeah cause the guy was drunk it's not your fault they shouldn't raise your insurance.
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Comments (104)
ToxicTyrael 26
FYL OP but I really like your style of writing. Reading this FML made me lol!
Mortoli 30
At least you still have insurance. My first wreck, my insurance company dropped my ass. Lol.
eilidhmackenzie2 1
Bob Marley in a weed factory??????
shinikageWolf 15
Is NO ONE questioning the existence of a weed factory?
Zebediabolical 45
Of course we are. But the comments have vanished. It's a Christmas miracle!
lina21 12
Question is what happened in the first 2. The one that isn't your fault sucks. But it wouldn't be that bad if the other 2 hadn't happened
jessdexter 5
I highly doubt that, Bob Marley smoked A LOT
ohSNAPyall 27
A weed factory?
jlujan00_fml 9
What's a weed factory?
dewberry2001 25
As am I.
ITSUPEREFFECTIVE 12
This is the aftermath of movie car chases on the opposite side of the rode.