Intimacy: Today, right before my boyfriend and I were about to have sex,...

By >{%£•¥ - 27/11/2010 07:08 - United States

Today, right before my boyfriend and I were about to have sex, he touched his butt and says, "Oh I have a butt pimple." He then went and popped it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 060

You deserved it 4 151

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 17/11/2011 14:06 - United States

Today, I was doing the reverse cowgirl with my boyfriend. I was on the way to a glorious finish when he pointed out that I had a pimple on my butt. He began to laugh so hard that he went soft. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 691

You deserved it 6 083

Great expectations

By Anonymous - 23/10/2020 08:08 - United Kingdom - London

Today, after making love to my boyfriend, I went upstairs to shower. After turning it on, I found a huge pimple on my leg and the prospect of popping it excited me more than my boyfriend ever had in bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 126

You deserved it 384

Check this out

By Anonymous - 19/12/2010 05:24 - United States

Today, my boyfriend called me into the bathroom after he had been in there a while. I found him with his pants down, looking at a pimple on his butt in the mirror. He asked me for, "Help." FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 869

You deserved it 4 538

By Anonymous - 18/02/2014 19:49 - Virgin Islands, U.S. - Kingshill

Today, while getting intimate with my boyfriend, he started sucking on my breast. He ended up popping a pimple on it into his mouth. He threw up and that, as they say, was the end of that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 292

You deserved it 19 273

By KAAALIS - 16/03/2009 02:20 - United States

Today, I bit my boyfriend's neck. I felt something squirt into my mouth. Turns out I had just popped a pimple on his neck. Into my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 738 203

You deserved it 495 425

By omgboobs - 23/12/2009 02:34 - United States

Today, my boyfriend told me that when my nipples are hard, he thinks that they look like giant zits, and when he squeezes them, he imagines them popping pus. He then reached for my chest. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 919

You deserved it 2 768

Do ya think I'm sexy?

By wifelyduties - 17/04/2020 14:00

Today, my husband called me to our bedroom, saying he needed help with something. I found him sitting on the bed with his pants down, so I smiled and asked if he was angling for sex, which was fine with me. Nope. He needed me to pop a pimple under his ballsack. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 207

You deserved it 346

What what?

By Anonymous - 12/04/2022 16:00

Today, my boyfriend stuck his finger in my butt and I liked it, but I can’t ever tell him that or he’ll get that smug look on his face like, “I told you so, let’s have anal now.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 479

You deserved it 1 404

Mr Clean

By Anonymous - 18/01/2013 10:50 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate. I grabbed his butt to control his thrusts and got a clump of used toilet paper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 243

You deserved it 7 592

By C0r1nn3 - 07/06/2012 04:02 - United States - Santa Clara

Today, I was cuddling with my boyfriend in bed after a round of amazing sex. He decided it would be a great time to stick his finger up my nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 799

You deserved it 5 065

toastygoat 0

Saturday 27 November 2010 16:31

Does this really affect your life in the least?

torio123 27

Sunday 31 July 2011 1:09

you don't dump someone because they have a butt pimple that's just plain rude

Comments

Nickolazx 0

Saturday 27 November 2010 19:59

Lol wtf

silversun14 0

Saturday 27 November 2010 20:32

ummm everyone at least once in their life gets a butt pimple deal with it

badintentions 0

Saturday 27 November 2010 20:37

u should've popped it for him. it'd only be fair, u blow a white load on his ass, then he blows one on yours.

Lady_Tahtahs 0

Sunday 28 November 2010 3:46

Haha good point!

beonka255 0

Sunday 28 November 2010 9:08

hahahahaha Niiiiice

abbeymcnally 0

Saturday 27 November 2010 20:46

At least he was polite enough to do it before you start. OP, you're ungrateful.

AthinaMarie 0

Saturday 27 November 2010 20:48

Ew.. That would have ended sex between me and him for a long time x( Haha gross.

shroomboy 4

Monday 12 March 2012 0:13

Are you ******* kidding me?

a_girl_i_know 0

Saturday 27 November 2010 20:58

you should have popped it for him, that is always fun!! hahaha

eatlesschipmunks 0

Saturday 27 November 2010 21:55

He doesn't like sex®

DaleksAreEpic 0

Saturday 27 November 2010 23:05

Sex is copyrighted now? Damn.

BloodyHeel 8

Sunday 28 November 2010 4:03

Oh dear!

charlcielove 0

Saturday 27 November 2010 22:45

if you were a good girlfriend you would have pinched it for him...

stevenmx86 7

Saturday 27 November 2010 23:17

Eww

perish 0

Saturday 27 November 2010 23:46

Eww

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The Top

Today, I asked a girl at work out, who'd claimed she was single. Not ten minutes later, our boss fired me. Turns out that girl is actually his side chick he cheats on his wife with, even though she’s 19 and he’s 48. Not illegal, just scummy as hell, and he fired me out of jealousy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 745

You deserved it 100

Today, after spotting my ex-boyfriend's truck in a desolate parking lot, I decided to "decorate" the muddy side of it with a rather large male appendage. After checking around me to make sure there were no witnesses, I got to work. I probably should have made sure he wasn't sitting in the truck. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 280

You deserved it 49 810

The Top

Today, as always, my parents wait until I go into the kitchen to drop what they’re doing, rush into the kitchen, and stare at me while I’m making food. They also comment on what I’m eating. I’ve had seven therapists and none of them were able to help me with my embarrassment surrounding food. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 114

You deserved it 122

Today, I heard my girlfriend refer to me as her “boyfriend for now”, as in the guy she strings along until she meets the guy she loves and wants to marry. We’ve been together for two years and rent a flat together. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 032

You deserved it 121

Today, our favorite teacher walked into our history class and everyone started whistling, I decided to join in by screaming, "Sexy!" The room went quiet and all heads turned to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 861

You deserved it 80 592

Today, I put on makeup for a picture. My Facebook profile picture. That's how much of a life I actually have. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 627

You deserved it 33 650

Today, I went to go use an automatic cart in Walmart because I broke my hip in January. They were all being used by morbidly obese people throughout the store. I asked a manager if she could get me one, but apparently their weight issues are more impeding than my broken hip. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 149

You deserved it 3 649

Today, my parents went on holiday less than two hours ago. They’re probably still in the airport, and not even on the plane yet. In those two hours I spilled milk on dad's armchair, broke a door handle off a kitchen cupboard, and stepped on and broke the cat's tail so I’m now in the vet's waiting room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 229

You deserved it 521