Today, one of the human turds that I stupidly added on Facebook posted how terrible her life is after her dad refused to arrange yet another holiday for her this year, so I bitched her out for being such a spoiled little brat. A few hours later, her boyfriend came over and beat the shit out of me. FML
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By
myth454
| 2
Assault?
By
Hiimhaileypotter
| 52
Why didn't you just delete her? I realize how annoying some people can be, but the better thing to do is just delete and ignore...
COMMENTS
By
myth454
| 2
Assault?
Reply
awsetdvcshjkgss
| 1
Just delete them no need to make comments when you don't care
Reply
miniluda12
| 12
Sorry, OP, I'd say YDI
Reply
SenselessPattern
| 12
Actions speak louder than words, but this is just ridiculous.
Though he has a point. OP, the police exist in many countries for a reason other than donut control.
Though he has a point. OP, the police exist in many countries for a reason other than donut control.
Reply
icrest80
| 4
If you stupidly added her, then why didn't you fix the stupidity and delete her? You even admitted it was your fault ydi
Reply
gianthelper
| 1
Do i sense assault chrages?
Reply
kyarush
| 10
The best part is that if he comes on your property with intent to do bodily harm you can kill him :D
Reply
biggestfan23
| 11
Before OP opened the door he should've called for backup... Rookie mistake but you live and you learn
Reply
MoodyBlue320
| 11
That sucks, op.
Reply
Calyx_fml
| 21
Definitely press charges.
Reply
RetardedPotato
| 6
@31: There's a button for that.
Reply
doctorhook86
| 24
OP deserves a pass on this one; he was only saying what we all want to sometimes. Furthermore, the reaction of the dumb bitch's BF was disproportionate--that's the guy who really deserves our harsh Internet judgement
Reply
doctorhook86
| 24
OP deserves a pass on this one; he was only saying what we all want to sometimes. Furthermore, the reaction of the dumb bitch's BF was disproportionate--that's the guy who really deserves our harsh Internet judgement
Reply
Zimmington
| 21
Should've just 'unfriended' her. Would've saved yourself some time & some pain...
Reply
HollyDolly660
| 8
38 - Donut control... I laughed so hard
Reply
gottalovecondoms
| 0
Hes obviously a pussy that hides behind a computer all day on Facebook.
Reply
cartooncharacter
| 9
Anyone else wonder if her bf gets on this and reads it and beats the sh*t out of op again?!?!
Just wondering. Lol! Would be
HILARIOUS if that happened again!
Right?
Just wondering. Lol! Would be
HILARIOUS if that happened again!
Right?
Reply
SobrietyKills
| 14
I think it would be battery. Assault (from what I learned) was the threat of physical harm while battery is the hitting part.
Reply
sens3sfailing
| 24
You sound like a hypocrite who sites behind their iPod and reads and comments on fml all day. Just saying, no need for the name calling.
Reply
myth454
| 2
214. It would probably be both battery and aggravated assault.. Either way the boyfriend loses if OP presses charges.
Reply
Meettitan
| 14
Like 231 said --I don't know about other states --but in Florida I think that would be battery, not assault.
Reply
3yellowzebras
| 19
Not in the UK he can't @60
Reply
Axipiter
| 24
Aren't batteries the things in electronic devices that make my tongue all tingly when I lick them?
Reply
onlychildFTW
| 33
Yeah, assault charges is the best revenge I believe personally.
Reply
galacticstorm
| 6
My question is,how did the boyfriend know where op lives in the first place?
Reply
guy24
| 9
And battery
Reply
LolFMLnot
| 10
279 some people put too much information on facebook about themselves. You can find where they live easily. Maybe OP is one of those people or the boyfriend just asked one of his friends on facebook.
Reply
SpaceCadet87
| 0
I agree he could have just added her at al and fixed the problem, but to say he deserves to get beaten up because she didn't like his comment? No. Wait, are you that spoiled bitch? Lol.
Reply
SpaceCadet87
| 0
226. Coming from someone who wouldn't know manners if it fell on his face and wiggled.
Reply
aperfectxdeath
| 3
Assault and battery maybe? Either way long story short her bf is going to jail if he presses charges, which I would. I hope he gets shanked.
Reply
a7x451
| 0
256 That's because the UK is full of pussies.
Reply
omgwtfbbq69
| 5
next time don't open the door and call the police(:
Reply
Bpwoods
| 6
262 - I'm extremely tempted to try licking a battery now...
Reply
LMxDelta38
| 14
Ok for the record you can be charged for more then one thing. Think of battery as a completed assault. Therefore someone can be charged with battery AND assault.
Reply
thatsexychiq
| 6
What the fuck.
By
ahhhlogin
| 1
Your a guy right ?
Reply
Hiimhaileypotter
| 52
It's clearly indicated that OP is in fact male. Why?
Reply
siickman
| 7
1. It says the gender of OP
2. You're*
2. You're*
Reply
NashyzzleTheN
| 10
Umm no shit?
Reply
XxDevilxXGt
| 26
In fact, OP is a turtle. You learn something new everyday.
Reply
coughyochick
| 7
You're*
Reply
matthew3
| 2
You're an illiterate moron? Right?
Reply
Michael_92
| 20
I thought the little sign that said guy kinda gave it away.
Reply
kofeinisti
| 6
FML's mobile site doesn't have the icons. I can't even see OP's user name.
Reply
LightningCactus
| 12
Then you must be using an older version, I can see the sign that indicates male and the name is "Anonymous".
Reply
kofeinisti
| 6
I'm viewing the m.fmylife.com site, so the "version" should not be the issue. Maybe it's the browser I'm using. Anyway, my point was - it's possible not to see the gender of the OP.
Reply
arduousRainbow
| 1
Negative, he is a meat popsicle.
Reply
onlychildFTW
| 33
Why does gender even matter? Wether boy or girl assault is still assault.
OP, why add human turds to your friends then? I don't, I find they stink up my wall with useless crap.
OP, why add human turds to your friends then? I don't, I find they stink up my wall with useless crap.
Reply
urnext123
| 1
Yes it does im using mobile and infact it does have it
Reply
Autobot93
| 10
122 and 257- you're both wrong..... he's a lamp.
Reply
jake12221212121
| 4
If you can't see the icons get the app dumbass. And yes it is on Android as well. And may I add that is a free app.
Reply
0ops_i_died
| 8
I love lamp
Reply
SqueakyChipmunk
| 20
Some people get on FML with older phones, guys. Not everybody has an iPod, iPhone, android or other device that is up to date.
Reply
kofeinisti
| 6
Dumbass, I don't want the app. I don't need to see the gender, I don't really care which sex OP is.
By
Hiimhaileypotter
| 52
Why didn't you just delete her? I realize how annoying some people can be, but the better thing to do is just delete and ignore...
Reply
924halle
| 8
Haha yea, but I'm sure it was tempting...
Reply
mduffy08
| 8
Eh... Though some people should be put in their place. The universe balances itself.
Reply
mduffy08
| 8
Wow I completely fucked up that statement. What I mean is she deserved it, but it probably wasn't OP's place to do it.
Reply
Dr0reos
| 8
Still worth it OP. You're doing gods work*salutes*
Reply
Zimmington
| 21
*Note to self* Before 'putting a girl in her place' make sure I can beat up her boyfriend.
Reply
ImaginaryFoe
| 0
Granted some people need to be put in their places but OP didn't accomplish that. If the girl is a spoilt brat, that certainly won't change because of one rude fb comment.
OP, you didn't deserve to be assaulted and I do hope you pressed charges. Maybe next time keep your unsolicited opinions to yourself (or in the comments of FML).
And everyone, stop being "friends" with people you don't like! Why do people invite the worst part of socialising into their social networks?
OP, you didn't deserve to be assaulted and I do hope you pressed charges. Maybe next time keep your unsolicited opinions to yourself (or in the comments of FML).
And everyone, stop being "friends" with people you don't like! Why do people invite the worst part of socialising into their social networks?
Reply
truthbringer007
| 6
162- AMEN!!!
Reply
epic13
| 12
Delete and ignore is like seeing a bomb at an airport and not telling anyone.
Reply
dreadedguardian
| 5
Yeah, that's the spirit, ignore it and the problem will go away. People like you are the problem with this world.
Reply
galacticstorm
| 6
162 I'm sure the saying "keep your friends close and enemies closer" is a reason we add the people that we do.
By
ThexVengence
| 21
Wow. I don't know if it's stupid o completely true
By
misspulkadot24
| 17
Well, you spoke the truth, especially titling her "human turd".
Reply
klovely22
| 13
Doesn't make it ok. If he was annoyed, he should have blocked her. Simple as that.
Reply
CallMeMcFeelii
| 13
I'm sort of in the middle on this one. First off you shouldn't instigate something like that. Even still if you decide to do what the OP did you really oughta think of what could happen. Though it was most likely out of impulse.
Reply
AClassActx3
| 7
Some people NEED the truth. All though I'm against voicing opinions without asked nowadays, I feel that the actions were not equal. Assault for his opinion? Why didnt she just delete the comment and him? Both sides are somewhat at fault but she took the cake!
Reply
AlexaWuzHere
| 31
Come on people, let's be honest here. We all know there's that one person on Facebook you REALLY want to tell off. The difference is how you handle it. There's been cases where I delete people, and cases where I said something about it.
Reply
jweezy89
| 4
You should never try to "put someone in their place" for what they write on their wall. Yeah those people are annoying but you also look like a douche who can't mind your own business. This problem would have easily been solved with the proper application of the unfriend or unsubscribe buttons.
Reply
Jaxx66
| 21
I don't agree with OP 'minding his own business'.. It's Facebook, if you post it then it becomes everyone's business. BUUUT, I do think he should have handled it better... Delete, ignore...
Reply
truthbringer007
| 6
If she puts her "problems" on FB she is subjecting herself to everyone's opinions.
Reply
misspulkadot24
| 17
I have hit the delete button on many a snob. But some of them you are sick of hearing how hard their life is because their salon lady was busy that week or their personal maid stole a Jolly Rancher. Or your sick of seeing all of their "YOLO" statuses and a profile picture adorning a duck face. You want to tell them off!
Reply
BouyantDuckie
| 0
ew take off that ugly a$$ profile pic
By
AMCJEEP
| 10
Go get a crowbar and break his knee. Fuck him
Reply
42istheanswer
| 27
Half-life style :)
Reply
SqueakyChipmunk
| 20
No! Kick him in the nuts with steel toed cleats and dye his girlfriend's hair green!
Mwahaha!
Mwahaha!
Reply
MrSassypants
| 32
Get a crowbar, break his knee, and then fuck them? I think you're trying to punish them, not treat them.
Reply
IceCreamMage
| 17
Tire iron, steel pipe, crowbar. All of those are effective. Her boyfriend deserves a good beat down.
Reply
NOOBSQUAD
| 0
Or push him down some stone or concrete steps
Reply
flockz
| 19
or throw some gummy bears at him. Thug Life.
Reply
numbersystem
| 4
Hug Life
Reply
FlavorlessPie
| 7
Sounds kinky
Reply
jweezy89
| 4
Has anyone considered how fucked op will be when the bf returns with a gun? This kid should take his ass kicking and move on. He doesn't sound like the type who could handle escalation.
Reply
SqueakyChipmunk
| 20
I'm so gangster, I throw skittles and peanuts at people. Trail mix, bitches!
52) He meant to say "fuck him with a metal rod covered in sandpaper".
52) He meant to say "fuck him with a metal rod covered in sandpaper".
Reply
saintsrocksocks
| 10
Or you could tie him to a chair and make him listen to boy bands and Justin Bieber. The worst punishment of all.
Reply
cartooncharacter
| 9
146- so Flucking true.
Reply
AwsumShyGuy
| 12
save humanity from an alien race and NEVER TALK AGAIN
Reply
amandajlucas2015
| 2
Lol all of these are hilarious and making may day thank u all
Reply
saintsrocksocks
| 10
Squeaky that's the worst punishment of all. Don't even say that.
Reply
eklipze
| 0
Haha op sounds like someone who should just man up and take the beating.... And get some sort of self defence course asap.
Reply
SqueakyChipmunk
| 20
153) Flucking? :D
183) What? Steal toe boots to the nuts, green hair or throwing trail mix?
183) What? Steal toe boots to the nuts, green hair or throwing trail mix?
Reply
saintsrocksocks
| 10
The sand paper. That stuff scares me the fuck out.
Reply
SqueakyChipmunk
| 20
...it scares you out?
Reply
saintsrocksocks
| 10
It makes as much sense as freaks me out.
Reply
SqueakyChipmunk
| 20
Not really.
But then again, I'm just a chipmunk.
But then again, I'm just a chipmunk.
Reply
saintsrocksocks
| 10
Wait what is happening in your profile picture? I've always thought the chipmunk was about to be doused in helium.
Reply
nevershoutkendal_fml
| 10
The chipmunk is about to smoke. What exactly he's smoking, is yet to be known.
Reply
saintsrocksocks
| 10
Chipmunk forgive me for asking twice. I Didn't make out the lighter, I thought it was a handle connected to the pipe.
Reply
cartooncharacter
| 9
191, trying to reduce the frequency of explicative words, so buzz off.
By
klinkingg
| 0
You shoud've kept your mouth shut, but i woud've done the same if i was in your position. 50% FYL 50% YDI
Reply
chellyX92
| 8
Don't give advice you know you wouldn't follow.
Reply
nevershoutkendal_fml
| 10
But is there anything wrong with being spoiled? I'm very spoiled, yes. My parents pamper me and give me a lot of nice things. Yes, they spoil me, but I'm grateful for every bit of it.
Reply
Luunatic
| 13
Well, at least you're not complaining. It's nice to be thankful.
By
greenie213
| 23
Karma's a fat bloated bitch to you isn't it.
Reply
the_anti_hipster
| 7
Kind of like a Kardashian! Except karma probably has less venereal diseases.
Reply
pexy_fml
| 16
That is not karma that is stupidity for having the home address posted on Facebook
Reply
saintsrocksocks
| 10
139- You do realize he may not of gotten his address off Facebook right.
Reply
saintsrocksocks
| 10
Plus I didn't even know there are people stupid enough to do that?
By
omniaki78
| 4
That's why you don't answer the door and continue only staying on the Internet. Or filter your Facebook friends a little more wisely. Or silently laugh at them and they will never know.
Reply
ittybitttyme
| 8
Autumn? Heyyy! It's Lauren!
Reply
bTOhno
| 3
What I want to know is why the hell would you answer the door to an obviously angered man who you know is the girls boyfriend?
By
xxmollyxx
| 25
Time to de-friend the human turd.
Reply
SqueakyChipmunk
| 20
Don't forget to flush.
Reply
Blackmail111
| 9
And wipe!
Reply
cartooncharacter
| 9
Here's your polished "human turd" for the evening. Be sure to wipe your cheeks and flush the porcelain throne.
Reply
saintsrocksocks
| 10
Squeaky in you profile pic, what is happening to the chipmunk. It looks as if you're either dosing it in helium or about to turn on a water spout?
Reply
SqueakyChipmunk
| 20
That's a pipe, bro.
I was gonna build a hut, but I got high
I was gonna store some nuts, but then I got high
I'm gonna starve to death next winter, and I know why,
Because, cause I got high, because I got high, cause I got high.
I was gonna build a hut, but I got high
I was gonna store some nuts, but then I got high
I'm gonna starve to death next winter, and I know why,
Because, cause I got high, because I got high, cause I got high.