Today, one of my baseball teammates thought it would be funny to perform a "cup-check", by hitting our crotches with the end of a baseball bat. I was actually watching the game, so I didn't see him when he came up and hit me. I wasn't wearing a cup. My nuts have shrunk by half of regular size. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, we were playing dodgeball at school. I tried to duck and jump around so the idiots on the other team couldn't nail me with the ball. Mid-jump, it tore through the air and smashed straight into my ballsack, sending me curling into a fetal position on the floor. I feel like I got sterilized. FML
Today, I was playing some soccer with my buddies, when a kid came over, yelled "CUP CHECK!" and nailed me in the nuts then ran away laughing. Millions of my unborn children died in agony. All his fatass mom did was chuckle nervously and pat her satan-spawn on the head. FML
Today, while playing paintball, a shot ricocheted off a wall and slammed into my nuts. I told the other team I was out and tried to run out of the field, but as I was jogging to the door I was hit again in the balls. My friend saw this and dropped his gun, laughing. It hit me too. FML
Today, at football practice, the biggest lineman shouldered me so hard in the groin that my protective cup pushed back with enough force to crack the bone. FML
Today, my baseball team had a game and one of our best players was injured sliding into first. I'm pretty fast so when the coach called my name I grabbed a helmet assuming it was finally my chance to get in the game. Turns out he just wanted me to get ice. The entire team couldn't stop laughing. FML
Today, I was playing ball with my student during recess. My first attempt at throwing the ball hit him in the head. My second attempt hit him in the crotch. FML
Today, against the will of the kids in my class, we played kick ball. The first time I rolled the ball, the tallest, biggest kid kicked it as hard as he could. I caught it though, with my nuts. FML
Today, I went to boxing and this hot chick asked me if I was wearing a sports cup. I replied yes, when I wasn't. I thought she was going to check with her hand and feel. She checked with her knee. FML
Today, I was playing tennis with my friend. He hit a ball up high, and I slammed it down, thinking there was no way he would get it. Feeling pretty good about it, I turned around to celebrate. As I turned around, I got smacked in my face. He got it. FML
Today, I was playing soccer when a player kicked the ball at my crotch. In pain, I kneeled down. The referee came up to me and whispered, "The smaller they are, the more it hurts." FML
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Top comments
Jcsati8 0
If your [future] kids say they've never had a near-death experience, tell them differently!
Herbz 0
So, why weren't you wearing a cup?
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Comments (138)
Maverick5762 0
@ #3 Yes but it's probably better to find out this way then a line drive hitting him there... OP : Really? you didn't have a cup on? YDI lol
gymnast7853 0
lol that totally sucksss! but maybe next time be a little more precausious and wear a cup even if your just watching... i play soft ball and one time i was at a game and my teamate hit the ball behind homeplate and one of the dads went to go try and catch the ball...his head was looking up at the ball and as he went to go catch it he ran into a pole and his crotch just so happened to be at the end of the pole so he caught the ball but a case of swollen balls as his side order.... so i feel for yah..but maybe next time you be a little more prepared for those kinda situations and wear a cup...lol...good luck with your situation there bud(:
Jake1595 0
aw damn baseballs a good sport but that sucks
CeSbAlLa4lYfe 0
I love baseball players (:
2chris0 0
I feel your pain I never wore a cup for football can I got a knee straight to them I low-key cried
couturegirl2 7
should have been wearing your cup!!
summerhot_fml 2
awwwwww
randomstudios 0
Time for a "helmets check" next practice?
lkfoster1 7
I hope you beat the shit out of him
TonyDobiii 5
Tht why they always say wear a cup