Today, my son was finally born. He was the perfect weight, as healthy as can be, and has his father’s dark, chocolate complexion. At least I’m guessing so, since both my wife and I are white. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Same thing different taste
Today, my wife and I both have blond hair and blue eyes, we just had a red headed son. FML
Age difference
Today, I took my newborn son to his one week weight check appointment. The pediatrician said, “OK, and he’s here today with his mom and big brother?” He thought my husband, who is 21 months older than me, was my son. How old do I look? FML
The genetics expert has logged on
Today, I met my "grandson". Even though my son and his wife are both lily white, the child was clearly half-black. I pulled my son aside to have a word, but he said, "Her grandmother was black and she has recessive genes, it's really rare." I can't believe I raised this dumbass. FML
Suspicious coincidence?
Today, my wife had our first child. He's identical to her coworker. FML
Welcome to the world
Today, I learned it is in fact possible to give birth despite having had no symptoms of pregnancy, including no weight gain. Our daughter made a surprise appearance this morning at 6 lbs exactly, and we are in no way ready. We don’t even have clothes for her. My husband is acting like he’s been concussed. FML
Classic Dave
Today, after years of trying, I got the wonderful news that my husband is going to be a father. Too bad I’m not the mother. FML
Today, I took my wife and newborn baby girl home from the hospital. While waiting for the elevator, an elderly couple leaned over, saw our baby, and said, "Look, it's the fat kid that was in the nursery." My baby is six and a half pounds, and my wife hasn't stopped crying. FML
Today, I gave birth to my first son. He was 11 pounds and the labour lasted 22 hours. My husband was absent for 8 of those hours because he slipped when my water broke, cracked his head, and ended up in the ER next door. FML
Baby Daddy
Today, and ever since she got pregnant, my girlfriend has been hinting that one of her great-grandfathers was black, so there’s a chance our son may be black too. I wasn’t suspicious before, but she has mentioned it so often I’m starting to think it’s less a great grandad and more a baby daddy issue. FML
Slight issue
Today, I sit alone in a nearly empty apartment, drinking from a whiskey bottle. Two weeks ago, my wife and I were ready to welcome our first child… except the little bastard was the wrong color, and my wife's hysterical tears told me everything. FML
Top comments
Mynxie 26
Divorce her, found the real father, and dump them on him. Oh and make sure the cheating twit doesn't get a dime from you. Make the real dad pay for everything. Get out now.
Allie614032 34
I'm so sorry you had to find out this way. Did your wife really think that you'd believe the baby was yours once you saw him? Or maybe she was just hoping you were the father. Terrible situation for you.
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Comments (39)
psycobunnymamafox 13
Did you guys use IVF there could have been a mix up but some of the others could also be right one or both of you could have had a dark complexion
_ali__cat_ 14
The real question here is did SHE even know prior?
DragonMaiden7 15
You should really do a DNA test first. Genetics is a very complicated thing, and it’s not very likely two White people can have a dark skinned child, but it IS a possibility. Especially if you two aren’t very knowledgeable about deep roots of your family tree (not blaming you or your wife). You can wait to sign the birth certificate, and you only need a little blood for a very thorough test. It’s important to know right away, instead of throwing away your possible child and your marriage because of an uncertainty. It’s better to be 100% sure, than 95% or 90% sure.
Luke16eirb7deneuwn1 20
Just because your kid is black doesn't mean your wife cheated on you. Were either of the kids grandparents black?
dexter420 21
Get a lawsuit for emotional distress
joonsson 21
DNA test. If it confirms your suspicion dump her and try to make sure she gets as little as possible from you and cut her out of your life for good. Sorry that happened, can’t even imagine how angry I’d be.
TheJawsman 18
Why the heck is this whole idea of the kid winning the genetic lottery getting liked so much? News flash, the kid isn't yours. Let your future ex-wife and the biological father pay for it. Don't be a sucker. Take her to court, get a proper paternity test done. No lawyer in their right mind would try to argue some genetic lottery win in court when they know a DNA test would easily prove otherwise.
ThoughtsofaDame 12
They are literally saying to get the dna test BEFORE the divorce. thats the argument. Your reading comprehension is shit.
Darkness_Hate 29
"Honey the baby's not black, he's just tanned"!
abbas07 20
If you both have a recessive allele for 'dark skin' which was passed on to 'your kid ' it is hypothetically possible but highly unlikely
10thFloor 16
did they change the baby at the hospital?