Kids, Pregnancy and Surprise: Welcome to the world

Welcome to the world

By Anonymous - 14/02/2022 09:00 - United Kingdom - Preston

Today, I learned it is in fact possible to give birth despite having had no symptoms of pregnancy, including no weight gain. Our daughter made a surprise appearance this morning at 6 lbs exactly, and we are in no way ready. We don’t even have clothes for her. My husband is acting like he’s been concussed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 845

You deserved it 355

When Christmas Ends Badly…
Rather than debating politics with Uncle Roger for the umpteenth time, share the best Christmas FMLs to finally have a good family meal! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Surprise arrival

By Anonymous - 04/04/2024 05:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I just got home in a state of shock. My wife was apparently pregnant without realising it, with no weight gain, then she gave birth at 1 a.m. It was supposed to be a normal Sunday then poof, we have a baby and a house we haven’t baby-proofed. We don’t even have nappies or clothes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 714

You deserved it 147

Stuck in the middle with you

By Anonymous - 31/08/2022 00:00

Today, I found out I'm pregnant. The kicker is, I'm 5 months pregnant and didn't even know it - no symptoms, nothing. I thought it was weight gain due to antidepressants and I'm also dealing with financial issues. I'm too far along to get an abortion, and adoption is not an option. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 051

You deserved it 443

You have been warned

By anne - 17/06/2017 22:00

Today, I happily told my husband I'm pregnant. He happily informed me that very, VERY large babies run in his family, and even though he was born 3 weeks early, he still weighed 15 lbs. The smallest baby to ever be born into his family was his great grandmother, who was 12 lbs. OH GOD, THE PAIN. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 264

You deserved it 809

By mickey1928 - 12/01/2010 13:10

Today, I took my wife and newborn baby girl home from the hospital. While waiting for the elevator, an elderly couple leaned over, saw our baby, and said, "Look, it's the fat kid that was in the nursery." My baby is six and a half pounds, and my wife hasn't stopped crying. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 976

You deserved it 2 911

By Pudgymom - 21/10/2016 02:08

Today, I ran into an old friend at the store with my infant daughter. As we caught up, she assured me that I could get rid of all my baby weight from the pregnancy. If only I had actually been pregnant. My wife carried her and looks fantastic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 430

You deserved it 1 736

Get out

By Lennyr - 28/08/2016 06:36 - United States - Union City

Today, I gave birth to my firstborn child. Somehow, my mom and mother-in-law made their way to the delivery room, and walked in mid-push. While they were escorted out, I overheard my mother-in-law asking the nurse how her son, my husband, was holding up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 559

You deserved it 1 099

Genetics

By Anonymous - 29/09/2021 17:00

Today, my twin sister gave birth and somehow now weighs less than before she was pregnant. She also has huge boobs now and not a stretch mark in sight. Meanwhile, I’m still carrying an extra 15 pounds, even though I gave birth 5 years ago, and so many stretch marks I look like a fat zebra. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 516

You deserved it 345

By #MurrayShow - 27/02/2018 01:30

Today, my son was finally born. He was the perfect weight, as healthy as can be, and has his father’s dark, chocolate complexion. At least I’m guessing so, since both my wife and I are white. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 791

You deserved it 522

By youreajoker - 10/11/2010 10:28 - Australia

Today, I was at the doctors office after throwing up for the past week. My diagnosis? Apparently I'm the first pregnant man. After several minutes of me freaking out and him explaining how it was possible, he told me he was joking and that I'm fine, but my reaction was the best thus far. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 565

You deserved it 19 666

By sadface - 03/02/2010 11:58 - France

Today, I found out that I'm not actually pregnant. I've apparently been having a hysterical pregnancy because I want a child so badly. I don't know which was worse, the look of relief on my husband's face or having to send a mass email to inform my family and friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 062

You deserved it 9 165

why___me3 8

Monday 14 February 2022 11:42

She literally just said she had no symptoms, you can still have a period when you’re pregnant

MomofTwins 19

Monday 14 February 2022 19:53

That is absolutely insane!! It's a crazy ride, even when you do prepare.. Ask for help, get support if you can, and keep an eye on your mental health, for both you and your husband.. I'm sure it feels overwhelming, but you will be ok!

Comments

myfakeacc 12

Monday 14 February 2022 10:02

did the not having your period maybe raise some questions? anyways congratulations, children enhance your life

why___me3 8

Monday 14 February 2022 11:42

She literally just said she had no symptoms, you can still have a period when you’re pregnant

Lucky O'Guin 18

Monday 14 February 2022 22:37

So...the baby never once moved even an inch while she carried her for 9 months?

CowgirlWithHeart 15

Tuesday 15 February 2022 6:27

Not everyone has regular periods. And I felt little uterus movements when I was still a virgin, it doesn't always mean you're pregnant, there are muscles that can twitch and such on their own.

RichardPencil 30

Monday 14 February 2022 10:33

I think your husband is right. WTF? Did you just steal a baby and pretend you gave birth to it? That's more likely.

D J's MOM 17

Monday 14 February 2022 12:42

so you obviously haven't gone through menopause and haven't had a period for 8 1/2 - 9 months and didn't think at least, 'hey what's up with my body?' you're an idiot, but congrats anyway.

sadderp 19

Monday 14 February 2022 13:07

Op said she had no symptoms of pregnancy, and you can still get your period while pregnant.

themetropolitan 19

Tuesday 15 February 2022 23:56

Hidden pregnancies are a real medical phenomenon where the body hides all the symptoms of pregnancy, and yes, they can include fake periods to really make it undetectable. The however seldom make it all the way to birth without being discovered, and when they are, the mom typically start looking and feeling pregnant within minutes of finding out. Look it up.

MomofTwins 19

Monday 14 February 2022 19:53

Wadlaen 23

Monday 14 February 2022 23:42

Well, I think a Congratulations! is in order, and I wish you the best of luck for the future!

Nhayaa2.0 17

Tuesday 15 February 2022 6:47

Pregnancy denial. My worst nightmare. Good luck!

1known 30

Tuesday 15 February 2022 9:06

It happens. I bet it’s a shock. Those first days will be a rollercoaster but you’ll manage and hopefully have a great time. Congratulation to both of you, welcome to your child!