Work: Today, my new coworker told me he expects me to call him King... - FML

By earths_venus - 24/07/2010 07:44 - Australia

Today, my new coworker told me he expects me to call him King Kong and bow down to him whenever he walks past. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 969

You deserved it 3 603

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Same thing different taste

By Poorman - 11/12/2011 01:03 - United Kingdom

Today, our new boss showed up for his first day of work. I thought I'd seen it all, but he demands that we say "Hail to the King" every time he passes through the office. When I called HR about it, the guy on the other end told me to "man up and deal with it". FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 309

You deserved it 4 278

Workplace etiquette

By Anonymous - 04/03/2024 15:00 - United States

Today, my new boss sat me down and told me he's seriously reconsidering my hire, all because I greeted him with, "Howdy, boss!" instead of, "Good morning, sir." Apparently this indicates a lack of respect for his authority. FML

I agree, your life sucks 404

You deserved it 452

Suck up

By Anonymous - 22/08/2015 06:58 - United States - Cadillac

Today, I showed up to my new job early, hoping to impress my new boss. When he arrived, he walked by me and muttered, "Fucking tryhard." FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 790

You deserved it 3 416

Goofs and gaffes

By Chelsea - 23/02/2023 12:00 - United States

Today, I called my new boss by my old boss's name during a meeting. My new boss said nothing, but just glared at me in silence. Somehow, I think he wasn't impressed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 598

You deserved it 220

By texasbest - 02/09/2015 02:39 - United States - Lindale

Today, at my new job, I walked into the office to hear my supervisor and HR manager talking about how, "the new guy isn't very smart, but we can get him to do the shit work for a couple weeks." Gee, thanks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 742

You deserved it 2 016

Dat ass

By brandonborgie - 10/08/2021 04:01 - Australia

Today, my boss slapped me on the ass and said, "Good work, princess." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 245

You deserved it 125

Meritocracy is a lie

By Anonymous - 30/05/2023 00:02

Today, we got a new manager in his 20’s who has never worked our industry before. His introductory speech included, “and you will respect me as your superior.” Our veterans have pranked him three times already and he blames me because mine is the only name he seems able to remember. FML

I agree, your life sucks 957

You deserved it 117

Grammar rules, OK!

By Anonymous - 21/09/2011 12:11 - United States

Today, my new boss lost his shit and flew into a ten minute rant against me about the "value of respect". He told me that if I wanted to stay in "his" company, I'd best start toeing the line. All this because I corrected his misuse of "your" and "you're" in one of his memos. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 103

You deserved it 9 384

Nepotism rules

By SHIIIIITTTT - 10/08/2012 23:16 - United States - Houston

Today, my new boss, the CEO's son, finally showed up for work, three days late and right after lunch break. His first order of business was to call a meeting and scream at everyone for not having a diet latte waiting for him on his desk. God help us all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 185

You deserved it 1 788

Time to run

By friendlessatwork - 02/10/2012 18:27 - United States - Storrs Mansfield

Today, I got a coworker at my new job in trouble, because he kept harassing me and asking me out, even after I clearly told him I wasn't interested. Turns out he's very popular around here, and everyone now hates me for being a trouble-maker and not "taking a compliment." FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 827

You deserved it 3 719

Next

Top comments

Lindsaykae 0

Saturday 24 July 2010 19:14

kick his ass.

crabgass 3

Saturday 24 July 2010 19:16

o.O look him straight in the eye say it was love that killed the beast then run away

Comments

SeaNDouble 1

Saturday 24 July 2010 21:40

#18 fail. just don't do it and give him a hard time about something.

MrHankey0123 0

Saturday 24 July 2010 21:45

it's not America. they might not have that

johnnyg1018 0

Saturday 24 July 2010 22:09

hahahah

cherylface 13

Saturday 24 July 2010 22:26

Your life is not ******. I'm sure you took a joke out of context because you thought it would make a funny FML; it doesn't. Let's play along and pretend he was serious. Just imagine the outlandish possibility that you DON'T call him King Kong or bow. What kind of retaliation does he have? None. And if he was stupid enough to try anything you could report him to HR. The end.

Rickyretardo 0

Saturday 24 July 2010 22:26

call him king thong

Ross_H 0

Saturday 24 July 2010 22:46

Personally I'd call him 'Wanker' with a smile, then I'd bow.

SapphireSympathy 7

Saturday 24 July 2010 22:48

wooow. ur life soooo sucks *sarcasm* i bet the dude was just kidding, and if he wasnt, ur working in a seriously f**ked up job. so the next time he walks past you, completely ignore him and pretend u didnt even notice him. YDI

ilynunezz 0

Saturday 24 July 2010 22:56

ok?

birdiesgirl0509 0

Saturday 24 July 2010 23:05

You could always call him King Dong instead.... ^_^

osirisfrost 0

Saturday 24 July 2010 23:06

get in a biplane and shoot his silly ass of the highest building.

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The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 44 451

You deserved it 3 567

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The Top

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You deserved it 138

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I agree, your life sucks 1 397

You deserved it 222

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I agree, your life sucks 769

You deserved it 568

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I agree, your life sucks 48 317

You deserved it 3 656

Today, I was on a work call when my coworker made an accidental Freudian slip. Thinking I was muted, I muttered, "That’s what she said." I wasn’t muted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 291

You deserved it 962