Today, my neighborhood had its annual summer barbecue, and I ended up showing a little boy who lives down the street how to hit a baseball. When I gave him back his bat so he could try for himself, he swung it into my shin and yelled, "Tag! You're it!" FML
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Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I was jogging in my neighborhood when I saw a kid's ball roll over to where I was jogging. I stopped, grabbed the ball for the kid and went to hand it to him. He then yelled, "Stranger danger!" and his parents came sprinting out. I had to explain the story to the police for 30 minutes. FML
Today, I was babysitting my neighbor's kid. We were playing in the yard, when he fell and got a small scratch on his leg. I gasp, and he takes a huge breath in and yells, "FUUUCK!!!" as loud as possible. The parents thought it was me, and the mother slapped me in the face. FML
Today, I went to an amateur baseball game with some family and friends. When our team hit a home run, my grandpa took it upon himself to start screaming wildly, removing his prosthetic leg and waving it jubilantly in the air. FML
Today, I was playing tennis with my friend. He hit a ball up high, and I slammed it down, thinking there was no way he would get it. Feeling pretty good about it, I turned around to celebrate. As I turned around, I got smacked in my face. He got it. FML
Today, I was walking around in a park when I passed some kids playing soccer. One of them kicked the ball as hard as he could at me. Luckily, I caught the ball, then I drop-kicked it, intending to say, "Go get it." Instead, it bounced off a nearby tree and hit me in the face. FML
Today, while walking through the park, a little boy came running up to me and hit me in the nuts with a stick. I fell on the ground and looked up just in time to see his mom giving him the thumbs up with a smile on her face. FML
Today, I volunteered to help out at an elementary school. I accidentally elbowed a little girl in the face while playing tag. And an hour later, a little boy flew out of his swing because I accidentally pushed him too hard. They're both siblings and are my child psychology instructor's kids. FML
Today, my little brother came into my room and hit me over the head with his baseball bat. He then dropped the bat onto my floor and ran crying into my mother's room proclaiming I stole his bat and beat him with it for fun. FML
Today, I was in the park for a walk when a ball rolled to my feet. Figuring it belonged to the kids not far off, I wound back and kicked. The ball had actually been kicked by someone else for their dog to chase and I ended up punting it in the head. FML
Today, I found myself arguing with a 6-year-old over a game of tag. FML
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Top comments
Forlorn420 9
Did you tag him back??
failureusername 12
That's when you throw your shoe at his face and yell "NO TAG BACKS!" D:
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Comments (75)
smilepatrol 7
Might be a little sore in the morning! :)
Eternal94 10
I didn't know that kid in Switzerland play tag with baseball bat.....
saksxalmo 20
Shin? Ouch, but it could have been worse. It could have been like a very unfortunate episode of America's funniest home videos...
pantherprincess 6
Little bastard.
DocBastard 40
You use that term like it's a bad thing.
Arthurie 30
Well, on the bright side, at least he didn't hit where the sun don't shine.
purebliss7 6
kids these days have no disapline i blame the parents
perdix 31
You're Swiss, don't **** around with baseball. Give the kid a tennis racquet and hope they take after Roger Federer or Martina Hingis. I'd mention William Tell, but you'd probably get killed.
1crabbygirl 10
That should be in a movie. Instead of real life. FYL, OP.
aleeshttylXD 9
this is why I hate kids.
ghostofChrist 2
its? lol.
THE_A_TEEN 28
Umm, 'its' is correct. Were you expecting 'it's' or something?
dominic1221 6
GhostOfChrist, it's spelled "I'm a ******* illiterate idiot", not "lol". Glad to help, and please... don't breed.