Today, my neighbor showed me footage of my 7-year-old son spraying his beloved rose garden with weed killer. The whole garden is dead as fuck, and I'm now being taken to small claims court. FML
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70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, in court, I was called a "pompous little gnome" by the woman I was there suing, for destroying my front garden with weed killer. The judge agreed with her and threw the case out for lack of evidence it was actually her that destroyed my garden. FML
Today, the tenants I kicked out of the house I just bought took the entire garden and flowers with them. I was already listing the place as a rental with a "backyard oasis" and now it's nothing but dirt. The courts refuse to help me. FML
Today, my neighbour is suing me because she got stung in the face by a wasp, a wasp that came from my garden into hers and stung her, therefore it must be my fault. FML
Today, my crazy neighbor screamed at me from her porch for walking "too close" to her plants. I was on the sidewalk. She sprayed me with her hose anyway. FML
Today, tired of people letting their dogs crap in my yard, I sprinkled an assortment of crushed peppers around my lawn as a deterrent. One dog went to do its business and had some sort of allergic reaction. Now its bitchy owner is threatening to sue me, and tried to have her daughter kick my ass. FML
Today, my neighbor came over to borrow my lawnmower. As I have previously loaned it to him and he returned it broken, I refused. He then promptly ate the strawberries off my daughter's small strawberry plant and stormed off. FML
Today, I left outside a bowl of fine herbs I had painstakingly grown from seeds, so they could get some sun. What did they get instead? My upstairs neighbor's filthy soapy water from washing her balcony. Three quarters of the seedlings are now dead. FML
Today, I was lying in a lawn chair next to my wooden fence when a yellow liquid started spraying me. The neighbor's douchebag son was peeing through the small hole in the fence and soaked me. FML
Today, my neighbor's son siphoned the fuel out of my lawn mower and put it in his car. What he didn't realize is that the fuel mixture I use in my lawn mower would ruin his car engine. His dad says it's my fault and actually insists I should pay his pissant son's repair bill. FML
Today, my 6-year-old son pooped in the back yard and used a stick to throw it over the fence into my neighbor's yard. FML
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Top comments
BI4ze 17
How would a 7 year old get access to weed killer?
smokecloud_ 37
He's 7. He should know right from wrong and to stay out of other people's property. Rose gardens aren't cheap and the neighbor probably spent a lot of time on it. I'd be pissed too, 7 year old or not.
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Comments (87)
CuteKoalaGirl 18
I don't know why your 7 year old was 1.) using or having access to weed killer or 2.) thinking it was okay to do things to other peoples property. Even my son, with ADHD and all that. Knows that you don't go around messing with other peoples stuff like that. Plus he knows what things he should and shouldn't be touching. He even did at 7.
ztress 10
How the hell does a 7 year old get weed killer. I think thats your biggest problem. also, no need to go to court just psy him money to fix it
snazzymcwho 21
What a little shit! I hope you punish him and make him help the neighbor replant and care for them!
Compgeek1996 5
And that's why the bottle says "herbicide," not "weed killer." It's also why you don't let the damn kid touch it.
False_Stupidity 42
Pure genius!
Mightytall 35
Your sons name isn't Dennis, or is it? What is your neighbors name? Mr. Wilson by any chance?
worldclassrager 41
Not sure if that's a bit extreme or the right form of justice
ImTheAlpha 30
What kind of kids are these people hanging around if they think the kid wouldn't know exactly what he was doing? 7 year olds can read. They can write. THEY CAN PLAN. This "he didn't know what he was doing" nonsense would make sense if he was 3 or something. He may not have quite understood the consequences, but he certainly knew what he was doing. He also most likely had a reason, maybe for attention, or the neighbor, in the kid's eyes, slighted him. We don't know why he did it, just that he did it.
CaptainCookie 8
I don't know if the kid actually knew exactly what he was doing. He's 7, maybe he thought the stuff only killed weeds and that he was helping. Maybe he was just curious. You can't expect a 7 year old to know exactly how things work; I've done worse things without knowing what I did at that age.
ImNeff 1
yay condoms
anarkia1985_fml 1
Love the part where he prefer filming your spraying all his garden rather than stop him and try to save part of his garden...
jackycat 17
Security cameras are pretty common.