Today, my landlord came to my apartment because of complaints from my neighbors, saying that animals are not allowed inside. Turns out my roommate makes cat-noises when she's bored. My landlord still doesn't believe me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I called the landlord about the mouse I keep seeing in my kitchen. He wasted no time accusing me of keeping it as a pet, and went off on me about his "No Pets" policy. FML
Today, my roommate and I got charged $100 for having a cat in our apartment. I was only babysitting the cat so my neighbors wouldn't get caught and fined. We got caught because my roommate reported the people downstairs for having a noisy dog, so they reported that someone else in the building had a cat. FML
Today, after I moved into my college dorm three days ago, my roommate is still convinced that she is a cat. FML
Today, I have to wear earplugs in my own apartment because my neighbor won't turn down his music. My landlord doesn't believe me because "people with disabilities can't be rude." FML
Today, my landlord came over while I wasn't home. My friend and her pets were thrown out by her husband. I'm the only person she knows in this state and she begged me to stay. I reluctantly told her fine; just don't answer the door. She did, with the animals, and told him she was living here. FML
Today, I witnessed my psycho neighbor put her cat in a cage, cross into my backyard, and set the cage down before returning to her house. She then called the cops and claimed I'd stolen her cat. The cops didn't believe my side of the story for a second. FML
Today, I got several noise complaints from various neighbours about my "dog that won't stop barking". I don't own a dog, my neighbour owns the noisy dog. She sent me a complaint as well. FML
Today, my extremely affectionate and docile cat, whom I love like a child and has never drawn blood, scratched my roommate of one day in the face while I was at work. She claims he just went ballistic, and I don't believe she's telling me everything. What the hell did she do to my cat? It's gonna be a long lease. FML
Today, my apartment complex added $250 to the $1,000 my roomate and I already owe because of an unauthorized pet and complaints from neighbors that our dog barks all night long. We don't have a dog, we don't even have a pet. FML
Today, my batshit crazy downstairs neighbor threatened me with "legal action" for making too much noise. According to her, it’s "illegal" for people in upstairs apartments to use vacuum cleaners, therefore I must sweep my carpets to avoid disturbing her and her imaginary guests. FML
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Top comments
cardtowermaster 0
explain to him you have a natural uncontrollable tendency to purr when you're asleep. while explaining be sure to add some meows in between sentences
shanemaximo 7
Tell him you have some very, very strange sexual appetites and since you already make videos you would be happy to send him one.
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Comments (92)
BIGBOY4rmAHM 19
Damn your roommate is weird. You should record her as prove.
mrsayuso 0
*proof
BIGBOY4rmAHM 19
Thank u for the correction. Didn't notice that till just now haha
mrsayuso 0
Well tell your roommate to piss your neighbors off more and start making donkey noises. Maybe the. Your landlord will believe you.
mrsayuso 0
Then*
Raesin 21
Your roommate sounds awesome
erockinthesuburb 17
Don't lie to your landlord. We can all hear the 13 cats you are hiding in your heating vents.
bubo_fml 11
My housemate howls like a baboon when she has sex...On one occasion, it was particularly embarrassing when we had a priest over for dinner.
Enslaved 38
I'm picturing your roommate as Ace Ventura? Hiding tons of animals through out the apartment. (:
FYLDeep 26
Tell your roommate to shut her pussy up.
lizzypooh36 18
my sister does the same thing. I believe you OP...
tehrealone 6
Hey, you missed your face in the pic
sinking_fish 12
68- who needs to take a picture of their face when they can take pictures of their pushup bra's instead?!:D
shrekus 0
Reminds me of a certain south park episode...
KiddNYC1O 22
"SHE IS MY JONESYY. SHE IS MY JONESY CAT. SHE IS MY CAAAAATTT!!"
KiddNYC1O 22
I'm sorry, but I can't believe nobody has caught on to this quote...