Today, my insomnia started back up again. It was too late to get something to help me sleep so I was lying there wondering what I should do. I decided to listen to some ambient music. It helped a lot, but when I was about to fall asleep, my parents decided to start doing 'it'. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I was lying in bed, trying to sleep, when I heard my parents having sex, so I put on my headphones. After listening to music for a good long while, I figured they were done by now, so I took off the headphones just in time to hear them finish. FML
Today, to help with my insomnia, I downloaded some relaxing rain MP3s and set them to loop. For the first time in ages, I fell asleep within minutes. Somewhere around 5, however, the sound of trickling water caused my bladder to empty itself all over my bed. FML
Today, I woke up early. As I was just about to fall back asleep, I was re-awoken to the sound of my parents doing it in the shower. FML
Today, yet again, I woke up at the sound of my parents having sex like apes, and couldn't get back to sleep. FML
Today, my parents woke me up in the middle of the night when they got in a huge argument and started yelling at each other. I was up all night. They decided to make it up to each other. They kept me up all night again. FML
Today, I asked my family not to disturb me while I slept, as I had hit over 72 hours of insomnia. My family must have heard me say, “Come in every 20 minutes and wake me up with whatever banal shit you can think of.” I gave up when my mother-in-law decided to enter my room and start vacuuming the floor. FML
Today, because my room was cold as ice, I couldn't sleep in there, so I went to my living room. It was at that moment that I realized just how bad my tinnitus is when I don't have my fan or any other form of constant noise to drown it out. I couldn't stop focusing on it, so I remained awake all night. FML
Today, after a week of insomnia, I finally managed to fall asleep. Thirty minutes later, my friends decided to bang on my door, yelling at me to wake up and party with them. I'm now wide awake and hallucinating from lack of sleep. FML
Today, I have a cold, and was stuck sleeping in bed. My roommate decided to wake me up by sticking headphones in my ears and playing heavy metal on full volume. This is the third time this week. FML
Today, I woke up at 1:39 a.m. to my dad's phone going off, only to hear my parents having sex. It's now 2:12 a.m. and I can still hear them going at it. FML
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Top comments
redbluegreen 41
I actually feel sorry for you, unlike the girl with insomnia who complained about the firetrucks. That really does suck. I've been there. Noise-cancelling headphones and white noise players can help. I would've taken something regardless though. Unless it's 5AM. To everyone who's going to say "Shame on you for thinking your parents don't have sex!" Or whatnot, how would you feel if you woke up in the middle of the night to your mom screaming? It's a little TMI.
czechgirl78 0
ewww i heard my parents having sex too once.....its very unpleasant. especially having to face them afterwards :-/
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Comments (128)
tomarino13 0
#8 your a dumbass, hearing your parents having sex is tramatizing.
fayull 0
Fake fml is fake
DeadMansCrack 4
The very second FML mentioning insomnia on this site..right after the first girl from yesterday. This one is bullshit. Next time you try to copy an FML, don't make it so obvious.
Loser390 0
I think the ambient music did it.
lolzforfun228 3
people have sex. GET OVER IT!
blueflare21 3
Holy hell I remember once when I was like twelve I walked in my parents room around three in the morning they were going at it luckily of was pretty part so I didn't see anything. However the nightmares well let's just say to this very day I still can't sleep well
dietSYNTHpop 0
Next time, combine the ambient music with a white noise machine. Then, at least your parents won't get turned on by your soothing music, and you won't be able to hear it even if they do :)
craphappens92 0
Way to kill a sleep
myaccount11 0
dude, you better invest in some really good headphones which block out all surrounding sound. or get some really strong sleeping pills. if not good luck on the noise(: FYL
rock_star21 0
EWWWWW, disturbing much?