Today, my husband, who has been in a coma for 5 weeks, woke up. When I went to visit him, the first thing he did was try and continue the argument we had been having before he crashed the car. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, after three days of hospital camping with my very sick husband, he was finally out of danger when I left last night to get my first good night's sleep in almost 96 hours. He woke me at 5 a.m. with a phone call asking me to bring him comic books because he's bored. FML
Today, my boyfriend of five years was in a bad car crash, and ended up with a concussion. He didn't remember me. At all. But he remembered his other girlfriend he had cheated on me with for two months. FML
Today, it's been a week since my husband woke up with what the hospital says is transient amnesia. He’s lost about 15 years of memories and thinks he’s in his 20’s. We’ve only been married 5 years, and dated 3 years before that, so he has no idea who I am, has no idea his parents are dead, or who our son is. FML
Today, I woke up with a headache and a bruised forehead after my husband full-force elbowed me in the head last night in his sleep. It wouldn't be so bad, except for the fact he has zero memory of doing it. FML
Today, I left hospital after suffering a head injury. My neurosurgeon gave my wife a list of potential household changes that needed to be made, otherwise I could have a fatal seizure. We got in the car and she said, "You do realise we aren’t doing a single thing on that bullshit list, right?" FML
Today, I got hit by a car while walking into the hospital to visit my wife, who had also gotten hit by a car. FML
Today, my husband fell asleep while cuddling. I didn't want to wake him, so I lay there for ages, trying to fall asleep. Just as I finally dozed off, my leg uncontrollably jerked and hit him in the nuts. He's convinced I did it deliberately as revenge for an argument we had 5 days ago. FML
Today, I woke up with a pounding headache. My wife tells me that last night I woke up from a nightmare, screaming, tried to run away, and knocked myself out running headfirst into the bedroom wall. So she put me back to bed and went back to sleep. FML
Today, at last, my husband instigated sex for the first time since the honeymoon a few months ago when he started fondling me in bed. Then I realised he was asleep. FML
Today, proving that there's no limit to the stupid shit people will do, my husband called me from hospital, needing a lift home. He tried planking on top of his car while his buddies sped it down a hill, and I now have to take care of him while his broken leg heals. FML
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Top comments
extremereviews 26
Let him win this one
crazyindynathan 13
At least he doesn't have any memory problems...
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Comments (76)
RedCronos 17
That's probably why he woke up haha
Dexter83_fml 17
Lol
ohsnapword 21
Let him have this one. Us men are right so infrequently.
lantz4levi 19
That's kinda funny actually that that's the first thing he brings up instead of something like what happened haha
anderson18 9
Let him have it.
Apparentlyacunt 18
Were you guys arguing about his driving skills? If so I think you have won this one, no contest.
StoneColdShaky 8
Gee OP sorry your husband didn't die.
TheNewGuy03 29
You are a ******-up human.
laden_swallow09 35
I read it as dry humor. Even so, still gets all my wut.
TheNewGuy03 29
You echo my sentiment. I like all types of humor, but ... yeah.
vikky538 29
Memory check done.
slavka012 11
That's a good thing. No short term memory loss.
allforfun 23
Lots of comments about "letting him win" on here. Why is everyone always so wrapped up in winning? When your relationship is a competition on who's right it's doomed.