Anonymous
United States
Today, my husband pooped the bed for the second time since we've been married. We've been married a month. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Same thing different taste
anonymous
United States
Today, my husband and I got married. The only thing that is different so far is that he now thinks that it's okay to shit with the door open. FML
Anonymous
Just once
Today, at last, my husband instigated sex for the first time since the honeymoon a few months ago when he started fondling me in bed. Then I realised he was asleep. FML
fun
United States
Today, my husband threw up on me during our wedding vows. FML
disgusted
Harpenden, United Kingdom
The language of love
Today, my husband asked me to spoon him. He used it as an excuse to start farting on me. Yep, this is my husband. FML
Anonymous
United States
Relationship goals
Today, my husband missed the toilet again. I would have been less disgusted if he'd peed this time. FML
heart broken
United States
Today, my husband told me yet again that the last two years have been the worst of his life. Our two year anniversary is next week. FML
Carpet cleaner
Canada
Wait for the hangover
Today, my husband came home late from drinking with his buddies, only to toss and turn and keep me up for an hour. He then sat up and didn't move for a few minutes. I sat up to see what was wrong, only to see him pissing on the carpet beside our bed. FML
Wet dreamer
Today, I slept in my boyfriend's room for the first time. I also wet the bed for the first time in a decade. FML
Thanks Honey
United States
Today, I found my husband farting on my pillows, bare ass. His only words were, "This isn't what it looks like." FML
mmvv
United States
Today, I found out the hard way that my boyfriend occasionally wets the bed. He's 25 and we're moving in together next month. FML
Top comments
Metalman69 0
and you didnt know he had this problem prior to marrying him? did you two not live together before then?
vicki2354 0
omg potty train that man!!!
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Comments (154)
Mr_Zachary 0
I just thought everyone should know that I am literally on the porcelain throne as I'm typing this. You are welcome.
bayonet 0
sounds like someone stretched the elastic band in his asshole. is he gay?
imnotsurelol 0
this happened to me
rasellersjr 0
once...
imnotsurelol 0
this happened to me
mattNL 0
Does your wife use FML?
Mr_Zachary 0
he's probably not sure lol...
rasellersjr 0
twice...
rasellersjr 0
Damn flood protection, and I guess one of his posts was deleted, it was posted 3x. I was gonna post: ...Once (1st post) ...Twice (2nd) ...Three times? (3rd)
towboatdude 0
sounds like someone didn't test drive the merchandise first for a little while. oh well looks like your stuck in a shitty situation. since the 30 day no money back warranty has ran out.
CallMeHush 1
Send him back to his mommy until he is properly housebroken.
dynky 3
poor guy. he should probably see a doctor if that keeps happening to him.
dukepliskin 0
That was sure to make you have a shitty day! has your room went back to what it originally smelled like?
skyeyez9 25
28: cause she would have at least found out her bf was a chronic bed shitter.
skyeyez9 25
I would demand he see a doctor to rule out any medical issues. Unless he has some sort of medical or repressed psychological problem (sexual abuse as a child), there is NO excuse to poop the bed as a grown man. I hope he doesn't expect you to clean the mess.
TheIrishJaneDoe 9
^ Agreed, provided he wasn't shit-faced drunk both times. Go to a new doctor if he's too embarrassed to see your GP. You shouldn't mess around with this crap. (har har)