Miscellaneous: Today, my house got robbed. They left a note: "Next time, we...

By Anonymous - 18/07/2011 04:26 - United States

Today, my house got robbed. They left a note: "Next time, we steal your souls." FML

agreeclassic 43 165

vote type 1 3 741

The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Similar FMLs

By Sarah - 17/08/2012 07:45 - Canada - Penhold

Today, my house got broken into. They just made a mess. I saw a note on the kitchen table that read, "There's nothing good here. You have shitty stuff." FML

agreeclassic 29 158

vote type 1 3 073

By Anonymous - 26/06/2015 16:29 - United States - Woodland

Today, my house was robbed while I was at work. The robber left a note telling me my stuff was crappy and that they found my safe under the bed. FML

agreeclassic 27 669

vote type 1 2 163

By Anonymous - 21/07/2009 17:16 - United States

Today, I left a note on the kitchen table saying to leave the door unlocked because I lost my key. I come home to find our house ransacked and robbed. Minutes later, I found my key. In my pocket. FML

agreeclassic 14 406

vote type 1 60 624

Neighborhood watch

By TheAnnoyedNeighbor - 03/10/2011 06:08 - United States

Today, I came back home to find that my house had been robbed, one week after my neighbors. I was walking around my neighborhood to see if anything was suspicious, and discovered that my neighbors had put up a sign, reading: "Rob the neighbors, THEY don't have a security system." FML

agreeclassic 37 610

vote type 1 3 294

By Anonymous - 01/01/2011 05:29 - Canada

Today, I went out for New Year's. When I got back, I found my house had been broken into. I found a note saying, "Happy New Year, sucker." FML

agreeclassic 36 037

vote type 1 2 931

By Anonymous - 17/09/2013 17:23 - United States - Bessemer

Today, I came home to find that my house had been broken into. After assessing the loss, I saw a taunting note on the fridge saying, "Locks work best when the door's SHUT." My housekeeper had apparently left the door wide open. FML

agreeclassic 48 633

vote type 1 4 069

By Aaron - 01/12/2011 22:00

Today, my house was broken into. How? My mom left a key under a flower pot on the porch. She also left a note on the door saying so. He stole all of my guitars. FML

agreeclassic 37 555

vote type 1 2 754

By racello13 - 02/11/2015 15:26 - United States - Baldwinsville

Today, I've been robbed. I came home to find my oven door missing. FML

agreeclassic 25 481

vote type 1 1 821

By Amanda - 19/11/2010 05:14

Today, my house was broken into. Apparently, I have nothing good enough in my house to steal, so they took my cake. FML

agreeclassic 31 354

vote type 1 3 847

By Lindso1 - 06/07/2018 01:30

Today, I came home to find my home had been broken into. Nothing was taken, but all the drains were plugged and the water left blasting on high, with a note that said “enjoy the mess”. FML

agreeclassic 4 237

vote type 1 249

TheRealBruce 12

Monday 18 July 2011 12:04

well y'all better put them in a safe

macdaddymady 8

Monday 18 July 2011 12:03

man that's some scary shit, it's time to move

Comments

Brooks2011 5

Tuesday 25 December 2012 4:29

You should probably move.

xRezSynn 15

Wednesday 20 March 2013 17:48

Shit. Hopefully you guys are gingers.

merpgir 7

Friday 19 April 2013 19:31

gingers.....

gageakers 5

Tuesday 14 January 2014 14:49

U were robbed by gingers

tigilly 14

Thursday 3 July 2014 6:19

Must've been ginger robbers...

SBurrke 11

Friday 17 April 2015 22:13

Better get that pyromancy to help defend your self from invaders.

star97 14

Sunday 5 July 2015 20:25

They were definitely gingers.

TakeAway 14

Sunday 6 December 2015 22:25

The only thing disturbing about that is their grammar mistake.

Dillopollis18 13

Tuesday 15 December 2015 17:28

Looks like you got robbed by some redheads ;)

queen_lol 24

Sunday 8 May 2016 7:42

Lol wtff

VDM sur Facebook

Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Top

Today, my boyfriend and I were talking about our past relationships. He told me that he broke up with his last girlfriend because she was smart and he suited someone who was quite stupid. He then went on to say that I was perfect for him. FML

agreeclassic 41 595

vote type 1 6 750

Today, I was hit in the face by the placenta of a cow that had just given birth. FML

agreeclassic 52 014

vote type 1 5 710

Today, I had to sit and listen to a coworker tell me about how disappointed she is her daughter is a lesbian and wondering if anyone still does those "pray it away" camps. I work in HR so I couldn’t even call her an evil, bigoted witch, because I know I’m the one who’d lose my job. FML

agreeclassic 371

vote type 1 158

Today, my boyfriend thought it would be a good idea to viciously rip off my thong. My ass crack is numb. FML

agreeclassic 36 423

vote type 1 7 502

Today, my wife told me she had a surprise for me when I came home. Surprise to me means sex, not a new puppy. FML

agreeclassic 34 039

vote type 1 15 941

Today, I waited on a gentleman and his lady friend at my restaurant. They ordered some of the most expensive items on the menu, and I thought I'd get a nice tip. Instead, he tipped me a scrap of paper, containing a drawing of a cock jizzing on a caricature of my face, and the word "Thanks." FML

agreeclassic 47 547

vote type 1 4 191

Similar FMLs

Neighborhood watch

TOP COMMENTS

Comments