Love: Today, my girlfriend hasn't spoken to me in a week, so I gave...

By Anonymous - 29/03/2015 19:54 - United States - Wheaton

Today, my girlfriend hasn't spoken to me in a week, so I gave her a call. No reply. I texted her, and got a text back saying: "Sorry, dude. Better luck next time!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 191

You deserved it 2 539

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Same thing different taste

By dumbass - 01/10/2009 20:07 - United States

Today, my girlfriend told me she lost her phone and not to call or text her. After about three hours, I text her phone, asking if she found it yet. I got a reply, saying "Nope." FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 760

You deserved it 5 870

By SugarMyBalls - 19/12/2012 23:31 - United States - Winder

Today, I had been trying to text my girlfriend all day, but no reply. After a while, I became worried so I called. She picked up and said, "Can't talk, busy." Not even a minute later, my best friend says to me, "Dude, tell your girlfriend to leave me alone. She's been texting me all day." FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 532

You deserved it 3 152

Either/Or

By Confused - 09/05/2022 14:00

Today, my long distance girlfriend finally responded to me, after a week of silence. Unfortunately, the response was to block me. I'm pretty sure she has found someone else, but doesn't want to tell me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 978

You deserved it 119

Long time gone

By Anonymous - 06/08/2021 18:01

Today, I haven't heard from my girlfriend for over a week, after being in a relationship for 7 years with her. She'd called me, saying she had to care for her ex-husband because he had suffered a heart attack. Guess we're over. FML

I agree, your life sucks 931

You deserved it 137

By Nox - 06/01/2010 07:25 - United States

Today, my girlfriend accused me of not having any friends. So I sent out a mass text saying "Hey, what's up?" to prove her wrong. I didn't get any replies. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 566

You deserved it 7 691

By bigdawg702 - 26/09/2009 05:34 - United States

Today, I told my girlfriend of 9 months that I was ready for marriage and start having kids. She hasn't called or texted me since. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 315

You deserved it 69 068

By schwange - 15/05/2010 17:07 - United States

Today, my girlfriend left me for my best friend. Over a text message with "lol" in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 977

You deserved it 3 884

By Anonymous - 15/07/2009 02:17 - United States

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because I didn't call her in the last few days. I tried to explain to her that I was out at my grandfather's house in a remote place with no cell service to stand by him on his death bed. She thought I was making excuses and called me a lying bastard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 866

You deserved it 4 557

By UnfortunatelySingle - 21/07/2015 06:15 - United States - Portland

Today, I wanted to text my girlfriend but lately we'd been at a loss for things to talk about. I thought, "Come on, she's your girlfriend, what's the worst that could happen." One hour and twenty two minutes later, I was single. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 430

You deserved it 3 377

By generic_name123 - 09/03/2015 13:55 - United States - Washington

Today, I finally got the girl of my dreams' phone number. After texting her "Hey, is this Stephanie?" I got response saying "Sorry bro, I know how you feel, she did the same thing to me." FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 608

You deserved it 3 355

giantsfan2010 23

Monday 30 March 2015 9:37

Haven't talked for a week? That's where the problem starts

lukian_fml 29

Monday 30 March 2015 9:35

That's a new way to receive a breakup

Comments

shinikageWolf 15

Monday 30 March 2015 14:38

I'm guessing you did something wrong over a week ago?

LastResort318 14

Monday 30 March 2015 14:44

Why would he have done something wrong? This was all the girlfriend.

Ironic_Meme 10

Monday 30 March 2015 15:07

Go to her place and beat the shit out of that guy. It's what she really wants.

Zebediabolical 39

Monday 30 March 2015 15:58

Did she know she was your girlfriend?

SarcasticShade 16

Monday 30 March 2015 17:20

"It's been one week since you looked at me." Crushed it.

thes7274473 19

Monday 30 March 2015 18:06

What does that even mean?

dnice1864 18

Monday 30 March 2015 19:08

Sorry, o.p. I've been there. Not that it helps, but at least you got a text back. mine disconnected her number. FML

turtlechickenpie 4

Monday 30 March 2015 19:33

She was cheating on you

sammysutton2 2

Monday 30 March 2015 19:43

Time to kick some ass my friend.

blindkid1790 12

Monday 30 March 2015 20:05

That's when you text back, that you got tested and the results were positive! bet she text you back real quick.

unicornruler 16

Tuesday 31 March 2015 0:40

You waited a week??

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The Top

Today, I went to Tiffany's to exchange a bracelet my boyfriend had given me for our year anniversary. It was the first gift that he actually spent money on me for. The sales lady then told me that the bracelet was not a real Tiffany's item. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 800

You deserved it 21 260

Today, I grabbed the nearest plastic bag in my bedroom when my boyfriend and I left for Walmart so I could return a pair of shorts. When the cashier dumped the contents of the bag onto the counter at customer service, my shorts and a used condom fell out. It was the longest return of my life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 609

You deserved it 55 889

The Top

Today, my apartment got robbed. My 'book-in-progress' should keep them company. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 831

You deserved it 2 656

Today, for my birthday, I got a hotel room for me and my boyfriend. He decided that spending time with a female friend was more important than spending time with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 014

You deserved it 100

Today, as I was making biscuits my mom joked, "Don't burn the house down." I told her "Don't worry, I know how to make biscuits." The oven caught fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 715

You deserved it 636

Today, I have an egregious delinquent neighbor. She is always using internet and electrical services illegally, but is always getting packages from Amazon. Her packages are always left at my place, as she is so afraid of tax collectors, she won't open the door. She gave my billing address without my consent. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 231

You deserved it 112

Today, I found out that the daily "vitamins" that my dad has been giving me for the last three months were actually weight loss pills. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 752

You deserved it 7 219

Today, I was caught trying to use the employee bathroom at the back of the store when an employee asked if I worked there. I responded with, “Oh what? Are you a hall monitor? That’s what I thought!” but ended up bumping into a corner and my nose started bleeding. FML

I agree, your life sucks 141

You deserved it 1 609

Same thing different taste

Either/Or

Long time gone

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