Love: Today, my girlfriend came over to my place, looking drop dead... - FML

By Crawling - 25/10/2008 16:56

Today, my girlfriend came over to my place, looking drop dead gorgeous. However, she preferred the idea of sleeping, and here I am on my laptop. FML

agreeclassic 50 062

vote type 1 10 272

The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Similar FMLs

By Anonymous - 15/12/2015 18:10 - Germany - Munich

Today, I had to work late. Due to delayed trains and a missed connection, it was almost midnight when I finally got home. When I walked into the bedroom, I found my girlfriend wearing sexy lingerie and fast asleep. FML

agreeclassic 30 014

vote type 1 2 605

By Anonymous - 24/08/2014 05:51 - United States - Hicksville

Today, my girlfriend sent me a bunch of sexy pics and said to come over to her place. I thought she was in the mood for sex. Nope, she just wanted me to come over and hang a shelf, after which she sent me back home. FML

agreeclassic 44 967

vote type 1 7 038

By tryon777 - 29/07/2010 00:40 - United States

Today, my girlfriend begged me to stay up late and video chat with her because she missed me. Even though I work early mornings, I reluctantly agreed. After waiting up until 2am for her to get online, I gave up. She had fallen asleep. FML

agreeclassic 36 348

vote type 1 5 099

By rejected - 28/07/2014 22:09 - United States - Milpitas

Today, my girlfriend fell asleep while I was proposing. FML

agreeclassic 57 802

vote type 1 7 821

By halza - 30/05/2016 11:03 - New Zealand - Christchurch

Today, after a long 16 hour shift, I was milliseconds from sleep when my girlfriend said she "wants to talk". I'm now writing this from the couch. FML

agreeclassic 14 447

vote type 1 983

Out of it

By Anonymous - 29/07/2021 04:01

Today, after my girlfriend had a nightmare this morning, I stayed home because she has really bad anxiety issues. A couple of hours later, she's pissed because I said I would stay up, but I fell asleep. FML

agreeclassic 914

vote type 1 237

Loveshack

By MoodKilled - 04/11/2023 09:00

Today, my girlfriends and I had planned a movie night. When she got home, she took her laptop and some snacks we prepared, and spent the evening playing online games. When I asked if I should wait for her, she told me to go and "watch some shit on Netflix, I don't really care" without looking away from the laptop. FML

agreeclassic 528

vote type 1 116

Set the scene

By NJ. - 24/01/2009 10:41 - United States

Today, I went to work things out with my girlfriend, with whom I'd had a huge fight with. She told me the night before to come over at noon and that she would be awake. I unlocked the door to see that the place was a mess. She'd thrown a party and was still passed out naked next to her boss. FML

agreeclassic 32 270

vote type 1 2 455

Cringe factor 1000

By Busted - 05/03/2023 06:00

Today, I woke up to find my girlfriend not sleeping next to me. I go to my car and found a plethora of printed screenshots of me commenting things like, “So hot babe”, “Beautiful! I’d tap that” and other compliments on my female friends’ pictures on Facebook. My girlfriend’s not picking up her phone. FML

agreeclassic 206

vote type 1 5 056

By Anonymous - 03/06/2013 20:55 - France - M?rignac

Today, my girlfriend woke me at 5am, just to say how great it was that I could still sleep two more hours before leaving for work. FML

agreeclassic 50 388

vote type 1 5 603

Next

TOP COMMENTS

your_face 15

Tuesday 3 March 2009 3:51

Heh... I've been on your girlfriend's side of the situation... on behalf of sleepy girlfriends everywhere, sorry about that!

sexaddict247 0

Wednesday 6 May 2009 0:51

If you gave a ****, you`d be happy shes there and go cuddle wf her instead

Comments

mfreeeee 20

Tuesday 10 May 2016 19:52

It takes a new level of stupidity to say that to a potential buyer.

kitkatmiaow 21

Tuesday 10 May 2016 19:57

Yes!!! I keep noticing odd dates on the fmls :-/

watermelon_bae 15

Tuesday 10 May 2016 20:16

At least she wasn't trying to sell you a swim suit that is too small! That wouldn't be too much fun.

pjsr 32

Tuesday 10 May 2016 20:16

Yes, it's getting to be a bad habit

gosh_mate 30

Tuesday 10 May 2016 23:31

If you're of a different decent, you're likely to be bigger than any of the Balinese. I remember I would always have to shop a large there, but am a size 8 here in Australia. Be comfortable with who you are! :)

curlytop101 23

Tuesday 10 May 2016 23:59

What even is the grammar on this post?

waleedma 18

Wednesday 11 May 2016 2:23

No the greatest sales person!!!!

saame9 11

Wednesday 11 May 2016 21:01

Guy-best compliment ever Girl-biggest insult ever

nevereyes 31

Tuesday 17 May 2016 0:36

What would you expect if your fat? Y'all complain when people don't make your sizes and y'all complain when they do

VDM sur Facebook

Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Top

Top

Today, I found out that I spent 3 whole days cleaning my apartment thoroughly and paid $100 to get my carpet professional cleaned to not get my $950 deposit back because the carpet smells like dog. I don't have a dog. FML

agreeclassic 11 318

vote type 1 767

My long-distance partner came to visit me for the weekend. When he arrived he seemed moody and tired, and refused any kind of physical contact. Upset, I asked him what was wrong. Turns out he's mad for coming to see me because I've put on weight, making the trip a waste of his time. FML

agreeclassic 3 653

vote type 1 494

Today, I went out for dinner with my parents where they asked me if I was still dating my boyfriend so I answered no. They quickly responded by saying, "Oh so you finally got rid of that douchebag? It's not like he was getting anywhere in life anyways." I answered no because he's my fiancé now. FML

agreeclassic 50 320

vote type 1 9 649

Today, an old lady rear ended my car the light. Her explanation was, "It's a new car, and when I take my foot off the break, it just rolls forward all on its own! I don't know what's wrong with it!" FML

agreeclassic 1 771

vote type 1 109

Today, I found out why this crazy bitch slashed the tires of my car to prevent me from going to my exam. It's because I'm supposedly the curve setter for the class and she wants to get into medical school without me fucking it up for her. FML

agreeclassic 26 544

vote type 1 1 907

Today, my Tinder date said it wasn’t gonna work, all because, I “need to lose some extra pounds.” Last week, I'd had another Tinder date and he told me he’d continue seeing me if I dropped at least 30 pounds. I think I get the hint now. FML

agreeclassic 1 128

vote type 1 431