Today, my girlfriend came back from camping with her friends. I say "friends", I mean "friend". And when I say "friend", I mean "her ex". I took a look through her bag afterwards, and well, who knew condoms were considered camping equipment these days. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I looked on my sister's phone. There was a text from her boyfriend: "Let's go camping again, I bought more condoms so we won't make a big mess this time." Last time they went camping, they borrowed my sleeping bag. FML
Today, a girl I like was taking her phone out of her pocket and two condoms fell out. Last week I'd tried hooking up with her and she'd said that she only has sex with a man who is her boyfriend. So I said, “Oh, new boyfriend, huh?” She said, “Nah it’s for hookups, gotta be prepared!” I guess she forgot she lied to me. FML
Today, my girlfriend was packing for her study abroad program. Jokingly, I got her a pack of condoms. She laughed, saying "Oh yeah, I'll definitely need some of those." Later, I showed up to take her to the airport and saw her open suitcase in the kitchen, with the condoms on top. FML
Today, I went camping in the mountains with my girlfriend and her very outdoor loving mountain. I sprained my ankle falling out of the car and got a bug bite on my penis while peeing. Her dad actually asked why she was dating me and she admitted that she had no idea. FML
Today, my fiancée decided to go on a 3-hour trip because she needed a break from the baby and me. I forgot to mention who she went with: her ex. FML
Today, I went through the stuff that I'd left at my ex’s place and started unpacking it. I found a pair of another girl's panties. We broke up a little over a week ago. FML
Today, my girlfriend decided to break up with me because she found a bra in my cupboard. It was hers. FML
Today, I went camping with friends, two guys and one girl. Night came and things got freaky. Two of them began to make out. I wanted to make a move on my guy friend but he said, “Nah, let’s not ruin the friendship.” Then he proceeded to have a threesome with them. Oh, and the other guy didn’t want me either. FML
Today, I went camping with my girlfriend and another couple. We saw a black bear. I shrieked and peed, while the other guy stepped forward and yelled, "Get outta here!" To my surprise, it ran away. My girlfriend is so ashamed of me that she's refusing to share a tent. I'm sleeping in my truck bed. FML
Today, I found out that the girl my boyfriend says is "just a good old friend" is actually an "ex that got away." FML
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Top comments
BeeHMC 9
I hope by girlfriend you mean "ex"
mz135 12
Sorry OP that sucks. There is someone better than her for you
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Comments (184)
ElricMustang 23
And by "girlfriend", you mean "ex-girlfriend"
StuckInDreamland 8
well did you know that she was going with her ex?
firepanda11 7
Condoms make a great waterproof barrier for anything. That's the only logical explanation I see.
Liiiiiiiiike 15
Relationships these days SMH. Sheesh
skipowww 3
I guess he's not her ex anymore... In sorry.
ty_rena13 11
Well....plenty of fish in the sea...ig
thecrazymancan 17
Why did you look through her bags?
False_Stupidity 42
Because he found out that she had gone camping with her ex, so naturally he grew suspicious and checked out her bag for evidence.
Goblin182 27
#76, I think the fact she went on a camping trip with her ex should be all the evidence OP needed. Would be for me.
whateverkiera 5
I'm so sorry :( you should've ended it there, you deserve better
little_one 20
Is it so hard for people to be honest and break it off before they cheat? Clearly if you bring condoms anywhere with someone who isn't your significant other you shouldn't be in a relationship. Cheaters make me so angry.
Ki11erC 18
I think you forgot to say friends at least 10 more times.