Today, my future mother-in-law told me she thought I was severely allergic to cigarette smoke. That hasn't stopped her from chain-smoking around me for the last 3 years. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my mother told me I'm going to get lung cancer. Because she smokes. FML
Today, my coworker told me that I needed to quit smoking because it was making me look and smell horrible. I've never smoked in my life. FML
Today, it's the third day since my mum quit smoking, and I realised that her health-drive is having a negative effect on my own health when she bitch slapped me down the stairs because she didn't get a joke I told her. FML
Today, I was standing on a balcony smoking a cigarette when I noticed a woman giving me strange looks. When I put the cigarette out and went to walk inside she said "You shouldn't smoke while you're pregnant." I'm not pregnant. FML
Today, I overheard my mom, who quit smoking years ago, saying that I am the only person who stresses her out badly enough to want to smoke a cigarette. I have never once tried to stress her out, and in fact I do everything I can to make her life easier. She works in retail. FML
Today, my grandmother - who has been a heavy smoker for almost forty years, and does not believe in the dangers of smoking - was diagnosed with COPD. Also, I'm now at a greater risk of developing COPD because of her (and my parents, who also smoke). FML
Today, I was having a cigarette in a smoking area when a mother with a pram strode towards me and exaggerated a cough to make some sort of point. Reluctantly, I put it out and walked off. I then turned around to see her lighting up a cigarette, and blowing smoke all over her baby. FML
Today, I overheard my mom telling my aunt what an “attention-seeking drama queen” I’ve been lately. All I asked was that she not smoke around me. I’ve had asthma all my life and am currently recovering from Covid. She thinks it’s all a conspiracy, meanwhile I haven’t taken a deep breath in weeks. FML
Today, I learned that I may have lung cancer. I've never smoked a day in my life but it could be from secondhand smoke exposure from all the years of my mom smoking around me. FML
Today, my mother tried to tell me that nicotine is the only substance that ensures weight loss, and that nicotine has been passed down in our family for over 5 generations of heavy smoking relatives. Then she encouraged me to start smoking. FML
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Top comments
ninjadinos 14
Let's be honest. Who isn't allergic to cigarette smoke? Its just like pollen, except for most people the affects of the allergy are lung cancer, emphysema, and asthma.
that1guyyy 12
Spray febreze on her face
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Comments (80)
iheartstewie7 5
Tell her you're severely allergic to her face.
linkinpark98 24
I don't think that would stop her. Considering she thought OP was allergic to cigarette smoke. She'd probably try to be all up in her face 24/7. Lol
rattusrattus 19
"I'm severely allergic to being out of your delightful company, dear mother-in-law."
SephoraGypsy 15
I read this in Stewie's voice with his manic laugh at the end. Made me happy.
lexishmexi99 0
Ha
wendyyyy 0
I would say to others - never wish poorly on others!! But that is disgusting... Hope nothing happens to you over 2nd hand smoke!
btstig 11
Time for a **** punt!!
Angelrose2004 17
It sounds like she's trying to get rid of you, OP. Damn monster-in-law. I mean... Eh, forget it.
countrygirl71 18
Mother in laws are pure evil.
Philintheblankz 14
Clearly your mother in law doesnt approve of you so shes trying to kill you with second hand smoke
Philintheblankz 14
Clearly your mother in law doesnt approve of you so shes trying to kill you with second hand smoke
lex1459 38
Smoking is gross.
G97Alex 21
She wants you dead, one way or another.