Today, my fiancée has been saying, "Shit's gone cray-cray" for over a week. I finally snapped. When I was done ranting, she murmured, "Baby, don't be cray-cray". FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, whilst in an argument with my girlfriend, I told her she was the craziest bitch I'd ever met. She responded with "Challenge accepted." I'm now terrified. FML
Today, the TV was blaring, the kids were yelling, and my wife was blabbering on in my ear. Overwhelmed, I shouted, "EVERYONE QUIET!" I got a second of blessed silence before my kids started screaming and crying, and my wife threw a tantrum, saying, "I married a psycho!" FML
Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She promptly had a panic attack and screamed, "No!" FML
Today, my girlfriend told me to stop saying "I love you" so much because it's starting to annoy her. FML
Today, my fiancé threatened to leave me for "bleeding too damn much." FML
Today, my 16-year-old cousin came to visit for the week. So far, she's said "raunchy", "cray-cray", "legit", and "like" an uncountable number of times. She's only been here for a half hour. FML
Today, my daughter taught me the literal meaning of "When the shit hits the fan." FML
Today, at Walmart, a woman kept screaming at her husband for the most ridiculous reasons. My friend snickered that she must be on her period, prompting her to whirl around, storm over, and slap the hell out of me, thinking I was the one who said it. FML
Today, I reminded my fiancee's kid to put the toilet seat up when he pees. My fiancée heard and shrieked at me to stop being controlling and weird. Yesterday, she threw a tantrum because there was piss on the toilet seat. I can't win. FML
Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She got incredibly excited and started flapping her hands around. Then she suddenly went deadpan and said, "But seriously… No." FML
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Top comments
thesmeagol 22
Two words, Duct tape.
BecauseIAmBatman_fml 22
"Do you take this woman to be your lawfully wedded wife" "Hell no. She's cray-cray!!"
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Comments (172)
brendejafulable 41
She has gone 'cray cray'.
TitaniumTade 14
She sounds pretty cray-cray to me.
ilovefall10 21
I would of been pissed off too. I don't understand what's so funny and cute about annoying the shit out of somebody. Only little kids do that, and eventually most of them grow out of it because they realize nobody likes to get ******* annoyed!
larajade 10
hahaha... Why don't you start your own annoying trait? Tit for tat and all that?
josiemorehouse 12
My 9 year old daughter started saying that stupid shit. I stopped it in it's tracks and told her that every time she uses words like that, she sounds like a moron. So if she starts talking like that, she loses privileges (her cell phone, tv, computer) and has to write sentences saying she will not talk like an idiot. No more 'cray-crazy' in this house!!!! OP - Lay down the law!
Dantebrown 5
Everyone has that one person in their life that just does that one thing that makes you tick
marramrammar 2
This post is Cray- Cray!
middlenamefrank 8
This is why you should NEVER data anybody with the last name Kardashian or Hilton. Period.
SayItHowUWanna 5
Well it sounds like you chose to be with her - so now you've gotta deal with the dumb shit or cut her ass loose!!
Witchylady 18
Dump her. She seems too immature to be able to have an adult conversation with. She is cray- cray crazy