Love: Today, my fiancée has been saying, "Shit's gone cray-cray" for...

By oh my fucking god - 10/07/2014 13:34 - United Kingdom - Derby

Today, my fiancée has been saying, "Shit's gone cray-cray" for over a week. I finally snapped. When I was done ranting, she murmured, "Baby, don't be cray-cray". FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 230

You deserved it 9 105

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Same thing different taste

By Andrew - 30/10/2012 06:08 - United States - Monroe

Today, whilst in an argument with my girlfriend, I told her she was the craziest bitch I'd ever met. She responded with "Challenge accepted." I'm now terrified. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 928

You deserved it 46 518

By gutted - 07/05/2012 02:13 - United Kingdom

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She promptly had a panic attack and screamed, "No!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 930

You deserved it 2 874

By migsman - 15/09/2010 02:43 - United States

Today, my girlfriend told me to stop saying "I love you" so much because it's starting to annoy her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 329

You deserved it 19 182

By bloody - 15/06/2013 08:57 - United States

Today, my fiancé threatened to leave me for "bleeding too damn much." FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 143

You deserved it 5 077

By Anonymous - 14/09/2013 21:51 - Canada - Sherwood Park

Today, my 16-year-old cousin came to visit for the week. So far, she's said "raunchy", "cray-cray", "legit", and "like" an uncountable number of times. She's only been here for a half hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 861

You deserved it 3 749

Splosh

By WhosGoingToCleanThisUp - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom

Today, my daughter taught me the literal meaning of "When the shit hits the fan." FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 045

You deserved it 1 825

By what's a rimjob between friends? - 06/09/2013 21:42 - United States - Boston

Today, at Walmart, a woman kept screaming at her husband for the most ridiculous reasons. My friend snickered that she must be on her period, prompting her to whirl around, storm over, and slap the hell out of me, thinking I was the one who said it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 084

You deserved it 4 442

By Anonymous - 31/10/2015 07:19 - United States - Federal Way

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She got incredibly excited and started flapping her hands around. Then she suddenly went deadpan and said "But seriously... no." FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 990

You deserved it 1 904

By Olive - 19/12/2008 04:11 - France

Today, and for the last two weeks I have been preparing my girlfriend for a break up with nasty remarks. She has been finding me exceptionally funny. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 333

You deserved it 40 715

By Anonymous - 22/11/2010 19:52 - United States

Today, my boyfriend of over a year looked at me and said, "Sometimes I just want to hit you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 892

You deserved it 10 873

thesmeagol 22

Thursday 10 July 2014 18:40

Two words, Duct tape.

BecauseIAmBatman_fml 22

Thursday 10 July 2014 18:44

"Do you take this woman to be your lawfully wedded wife" "Hell no. She's cray-cray!!"

Comments

Monika444 1

Monday 14 July 2014 5:29

She's right. Ranting is immature, and a good spouse doesn't blow up over little stuff.

AFaye3964 17

Wednesday 16 July 2014 1:16

I started saying this, Just to annoy my boyfriend.

ShaNiquaC 11

Thursday 17 July 2014 1:53

Pretty good

judyg21 3

Tuesday 29 July 2014 9:03

Lmfao xD

fantasyworld 37

Monday 11 August 2014 16:55

I can't decide what's stupider, cray-cray or yolo.

Ancient_Mirage 14

Saturday 16 August 2014 0:14

Silence is golden. Duct tape is silver.

jokersmile13 10

Wednesday 8 October 2014 20:07

Dead body in 3....2....1.....

LyricaSilvan 29

Tuesday 24 February 2015 16:03

I laughed a little harder than I should have.

Keywords

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The Top

Today, my dad uttered the dreaded words, “Now don’t worry boy, I knows exactly what I is doing.” A few short minutes later he has a destroyed impact drill, my ladder is snapped, my kitchen window is broken, my wife is in hospital for stitches, and we can’t find the cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 512

You deserved it 67

Today, I lost all hope of finding a man. I’m gonna be 34 and I can’t get a date to save my life. I was cursed with a facial deformity and 285lbs of weight, making all men run for the hills. All of my younger sisters have got married and started families. FML

I agree, your life sucks 415

You deserved it 203

The Top

Today, I was talking to my best friend about how much of an asshole my ex-boyfriend is. After about 2 hours of non-stop bitching, it turns out she's actually dating him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 025

You deserved it 1 458

Today, I found out that my girlfriend is trying to get her ex-boyfriend to move up here. FML

I agree, your life sucks 953

You deserved it 73

Today, after having sex with my girlfriend, I jokingly held the condom above my mouth. Somehow, the condom busted, and everything went over my face. Worse still, we're now wondering just how safe this condom really was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 745

You deserved it 42 609

Today, my husband got mad at me because I asked if we could have 2 hours out of a 16-day trip to go to the beach, just us and our kids. Why is he mad at me for this? Because his mother will be upset if we go do something by ourselves without her. Her husband and the rest of her family will all be on this 16-day trip. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 213

You deserved it 137

Today, I arrived at my best friend's wedding and found out that my invitation was no longer valid. His brother tried to explain that they'd decided to make the ceremony for family members only, then two our classmates popped out to say hello. They're not related, neither to my friend nor to his fiancée. FML

I agree, your life sucks 616

You deserved it 92

Today, I was fired for the second time in as many days. I received a letter notifying me that I would no longer be working for the company, effective immediately. When I did not attend work the next day, I received a phone call firing me for not turning up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 904

You deserved it 2 671

Same thing different taste

Splosh

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