Miscellaneous: Today, my elderly neighbor came crying to me about the horrible...

By NotaDTfan - 30/04/2017 02:00

Today, my elderly neighbor came crying to me about the horrible thing someone had done outside. I hurried out to find a big pile of dog shit with the head of Donald Trump stuck into it. I had to fake a coughing fit so she wouldn't realize I was laughing. I'm not sure I got away with it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 938

You deserved it 835

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Same thing different taste

Pick it up

By Cassie - 02/05/2011 00:21

Today, I took my dog for a walk. He started crapping on someone's lawn, then I noticed that the owner was outside and giving me a death stare. Not knowing what to do, I picked up the crap with my bare hands. The man started laughing at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 388

You deserved it 50 966

Devious, the lot of them

By Anonymous - 27/09/2020 23:03

Today, I was out walking with a cute girl when we passed by a house with a Trump sign. Trying to make her laugh, I went to steal it. Turns out it was booby trapped. I got drenched by a sprinkler when I got close. FML

I agree, your life sucks 508

You deserved it 2 322

Awkwaaaaaaard

By Zoe Avila - 09/08/2011 22:55 - United States

Today, a downstairs neighbor of mine claimed money from me because apparently my dog took a dump on the fire escape, and the poop fell through the grates and on her groceries. I don't have a dog, but I paid the money anyway, because I was too ashamed to tell her it was my husband. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 888

You deserved it 9 080

By heyhijello - 09/09/2013 22:05 - United States - Oakland

Today, at my boyfriend's brother's house, I desperately needed to poop. After finishing my business, I realized the toilet wouldn't flush. I had to pull my poop out, wrap it in TP and make an excuse to go outside to throw it in a bush. The neighbor was watching. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 065

You deserved it 12 720

By BaliTheDog - 24/03/2013 23:01 - France

Today, I was walking my dog when he stopped in the middle of the street and took a dump. I looked around furtively but saw nobody, so I just kept walking. I stepped in it on the way back home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 014

You deserved it 97 552

Spooked

By fucking mafia or what?? - 12/01/2013 22:02 - United States - Marysville

Today, I opened my front door to go out for groceries. Lying on my doorstep was a pile of poop. A piece of paper was taped to the ground beside it that read, "Do it again and you'll get more than dog shit." I don't have the slightest clue who I pissed off, or how. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 000

You deserved it 3 454

By Doggy... - 10/11/2011 05:56 - Australia

Today, my neighbours watched and laughed as I chased my dog around the lawn, trying to rescue the only clean pair of underwear I had in my house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 727

You deserved it 9 891

Rent hike to be expected

By Benji - 13/10/2008 08:32

Today, my 63-year-old neighbor jumped out of his window. I was the first to find him, alive, naked and stuck in a bush. I guess I shouldn't have laughed at him while waiting for the ambulance, because he turned out to be my landlord. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 367

You deserved it 24 127

By nightfall8705 - 17/08/2017 19:30 - United States - Walhalla

Today, I had to make my boss believe that I was late to work because my sick dog shit all over my bedsheets and I had to clean up the mess before work. The truth is, I don't have a dog, and I wrongly trusted a long fart this morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 360

You deserved it 1 150

By Kirta - 09/11/2009 15:18 - Canada

Today, while finishing up raking leaves, I decided it would be a fun idea to jump into them. After rolling around in the leaves for a bit, I smelled something funny. Turns out I was rolling around in dog shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 416

You deserved it 38 092

Druu 53

Sunday 30 April 2017 2:45

"These people who did this, very bad people. They do not understand the prestige associated with the Office of President. Very prestigious! These are not good people. Bad hombres. Rude!"

MidnaLink 33

Sunday 30 April 2017 3:42

I'd have just laughed and taken any hits from her purse.

Comments

RememberSchlitz 9

Sunday 30 April 2017 13:47

Haw haw, does equating Trump with excrement as an easy joke ever get old? Apparently not.

Lucky O'Guin 18

Sunday 30 April 2017 15:34

You're all idiots. Whether you support him or not, he is still the President and deserves some respect. If it had been Hillary's likeness, you all would be crying and yelling about how oppressed you are. Flaming morons.

RockPrincess26 16

Monday 1 May 2017 5:11

Thank you.

Jbones009 8

Monday 1 May 2017 9:57

so now that the person you like is president everyone has to respect him? keep dreaming lady. there will always be a large group that dislikes the president. nothing you can do about it. maybe he and all his supporters should learn how to handle criticism better instead of complainin and whining the whole time. sound good?

Jbones009 8

Monday 1 May 2017 9:54

there will always be disrespect for the president. thing is trump is the first to be so whiney and annoying about it. he needs to have his twitter taken away.

Soninuva 41

Sunday 30 April 2017 18:01

Am I the only one that thinks the FML (at least from the elderly neighbor's perspective) is more about the pile of dog shit in her yard? Regardless of the political message, that's disgusting and very disrespectful (not to mention potentially unhealthy) to do that to someone.

RichardPencil 30

Sunday 30 April 2017 18:10

Why do the comments from the Trump supporters not have buttons for downvoting them or replying? I'm wondering what they like so much. Is it the spectre of nuclear war, the epic, open corruption, the oppression of women or the march to dictatorship?

RockPrincess26 16

Sunday 30 April 2017 21:50

Where do you get ANY of this from? CNN? Stop watching it. It's not healthy. And stop confusing Obummer, Killary and the Middle East with President Trump.

Lalala579121 27

Monday 1 May 2017 4:38

We're not. Obama did and Hillary would have at least kept us afloat.

Jbones009 8

Monday 1 May 2017 9:52

calm down rock princess, just cause your little leader is super sensitive doesnt mean you have to be as well. so please leave the hate for yourself

purplekitty49 11

Sunday 30 April 2017 18:37

This has nothing to do with Trump but is about how we treat each other and how we talk with each other. I/You should never find a pile of dog shit on my/your lawn because someone disagrees with my viewpoint.