Today, my drunk boyfriend decided to wake me up by fingering me. Let's just say going to the ER to get your tampon dug out isn't fun. FML
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Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, my boyfriend woke me up by playing with the string of my tampon. FML
Today, I found out that last night, when I drank a bit too much and blacked out, I freaked out about "losing my tampon in my vagina" and made my boyfriend fish through to look for it. I had already taken it out before then, and was too drunk to realize. He told me he almost called 911. FML
Today, I was cuddling with my boyfriend in bed after a round of amazing sex. He decided it would be a great time to stick his finger up my nose. FML
Today, I was feeling depressed and got very, very drunk. This evening, I was feeling equally desperate, and ended up having to get my special dildo removed from my asshole at the hospital. FML
Today, I woke up to hear my boyfriend drunkenly crashing around in the living room, after peeing in an ashtray because he thought it was a urinal. FML
Today, me and my boyfriend had sex but stopped when I felt pain downstairs. That evening he wanted me to go to the emergency room but I wanted to sleep it off. Turned out I needed surgery. One of my fallopian tubes had ripped. The sex was so rough, I got an intravenous hemorrhage. FML
Today, I got a call from my very drunk boyfriend at 1:30am asking for my permission to have sex with a "gross fat chick" he met at a pub, because he "felt sorry for her." The conversation ended with me getting hung up on, because I "don't have a heart." FML
Today, my drunk boyfriend called me by my best friend's name in bed. FML
Today, I went down on my boyfriend while he was drunk, and he told me to get protection from his bedroom. I came back, he was passed out on the couch. His parents then came into the room after hearing noises. I was sitting there naked holding a condom while he was fast asleep. FML
Today, I tried to wake my boyfriend up to sex. When I went to touch his penis, he elbowed me in the face, mumbled an apology and began snoring again. FML
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Top comments
never_alone 10
how did he not notice the string? and how did you not wake up in time to stop him? you must be a heavy sleeper
wondermoose 28
did he not realize that right away or?....
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Comments (186)
worldclassrager 41
Next time he starts drinking perhaps a chastity belt might not be a bad idea...
MrConcise 35
Pads might be a little more practical.
mishwarner 14
That is sexual assault. You can't consent when you're asleep & bring in a relationship does not imply ongoing consent. He sounds like a jerk
Vestin 18
#38: Out of the blue, without context - sure. In this case, however, OP seemed more focused on the tampon situation than the surprise factor. This brings up an interesting question - can it still be "sexual assault" if the "victim" doesn't mind? We are dealing with an edge case here. If both of them feel comfortable with this, I don't think it's our business to tell them what they should and shouldn't be allowed to do in the bedroom.
militarybrat 21
He also couldnt give consent, he was drunk. Maybe she came on to him while she was asleep? Ive done that before. Woke up while riding my boyfriend. Guess i raped him huh?
penashmul 19
You aren't supposed to sleep in tampons....
limabeans101029 21
Aren't you? Surely if you're only sleeping for 8 hours, it's just the same as wearing a tampon during the day
ThePandoricaOpen 18
Not really, you're supposed to change them every four hours, (during the day, you're not supposed to wear them during the night), do most women do that? maybe, maybe not. Toxic Shock Syndrome is a thing.
tournamentdecide 33
Try reading the package, it says on tampons to change every 4-8 hours, depending on blood flow. I sleep in them and I haven't caught the disease.
Frammy007 7
#64 Be thankful you haven't contracted TSS. A girl at my school did when she left one in too long while skiing one day - she ended up in the ICU for nearly a month.
e_is_for_eli 12
you can, as long as you don't sleep for more than 8 hours.
limabeans101029 21
58- TSS occurs due to wearing a tampon for way too long (I'm pretty sure anyway). Why would you be okay to wear tampons during the day but not during the night? It's not like the tampons magically become fatal when it gets dark outside. Wearing one at night is exactly the same as wearing one in the day. It's the amount of time you wear it for that matters, not the time of day you wear it.
ThePandoricaOpen 18
I know that, #116, I too, wear tampons, I'm just telling what it says in the instructions, it really does say, they really do recommend wearing a pad during the night BECAUSE it would be in for a possibly longer period of time, than if worn during the day.
anyoldnamewilldo 23
Actually, if you go to the Tampax website it tells you that it is fine. You just have to use the correct absorbancy just as you would any other time of day.
Sheh_fml 25
The fact that you shouldn't really sleep with a tampon in isn't very relevant. If she is willing to risk it, it's her choice. According to the law, that is sexual assault or rape. I get that she might have consented beforehand, but the law don't really give a damn, consent is revoked when you aren't conscious. Both partners should know this.
invadermaythe1st 35
yeah, and who's going to the police?
ebonyirony 29
except my partner has permission to touch me while I'm unconscious.
militarybrat 21
Like i said in pp. he was drunk she was unconscious. So if she initiated it, did she rape him first?
chadminer337 9
Ewwwww
sheila6368 6
According to the insert that comes in every box of tampons, you CAN sleep with a tampon inserted as long as you change it every eight hours or less. It used to be true that tampons were considered unsafe for overnight wear but that has changed in recent years. I agree with an earlier commenter that the boyfriend had no right to sexually touch you while you were sleeping and unable to consent!
EbyKat 16
Relationships after awhile exist in a state of implied consent. So you don't have to get permission to come up behind your partner and grab their butt. My sister is cool with asleep sex, I am not, you decide these things as you go along.
Pycnogonida 16
Unless you know your partner's ok with you doing stuff to them while they're asleep *because you've talked to them about it previously and they have agreed to let you do it*, it's not cool to do sexual things to said unconscious person. This whole "implied state of consent" concept doesn't make sense for doing things to people who are asleep; for example, you could reasonably infer that your partner is generally cool with butt-squishes if they consistently and genuinely laugh/grin cheekily (no pun intended)/*react positively* in some way (though they do of course have the right to tell you to quit doing that at any time). But you can't get that positive reaction from unconscious people (and no, unconscious bodily reactions to stimulation do not count as consent). So just ask! If they're not ok with it, you've avoided doing something to your partner that they do not want (yay!) and if they are ok with it, you're good to go (also yay!). If you can't talk to your partner about the thing, you definitely shouldn't be doing the thing to them.
blackonblight 33
"Implied state of consent" sounds a lot like "marital rape" to me. Consent must be explicitly given without coercion or deception. It is never a given.
limabeans101029 21
159- Not necessarily. My boyfriend and I know that we have permission to wake each other up in a sexual way. We don't have to ask each other for permission every time we do it.
EbyKat 16
This is why my partner's only real rule is to verify I am awake before penetration happens. This and I feel squicky about being penetrated while passed out even in a relationship where you exist in that "state of implied consent".
madslurpee 8
sounds like a great guy
leelee329 3
Maybe you shouldn't sleep with tampons in lol ever heard of toxic shock syndrome?
Boopycat 15
Maybe you shouldn't make comments lol ever heard of having a valid point before opening your mouth? Read the ******* comments. Times have changed.
leelee329 3
Legally I can as many comments as I want, and it is a valid comment considering there's hundreds of deaths that are from sleeping with tampons in. Time changes but people still die, smartie.
leelee329 3
I did read the comments and not one said anything about toxic shock syndrome but nice try sweetie
limabeans101029 21
I'm pretty sure toxic shock syndrome occurs because the person has worn the tampon for way too long, not because they slept with it in. Most people only sleep 8 or 9 hours a night, so how is that any different from wearing a tampon for 8 or so hours during the day?
leelee329 3
Statistically a tampon should be worn no longer than 8 hours, but every single body is different, so regardless what a box says someone's body could handle it for longer periods rather than someone who can only handle for shorter periods.
booze_n_bitches 37
That's not quite how infections work. TSS is caused by strep or staph, it's not dependent on our own bodies, because it's not something we really have immunity to so everyone would have the same reaction if the bacteria were brewing in there.
burnthistown 20
You're not supposed to sleep with tampons in anyway