Today, my doctor told me to buy some KY Jelly and a dildo to help "loosen me up" so sex isn't so painful. I haven't been able to have sex for 6 months because it hurts so badly, and now my doctor has basically told me to go fuck myself. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I had surgery on my "girl parts" and can't have sex for six weeks. My boyfriend sees no need to spend any time with me until I heal up. FML
Today, I realized how much I hate my girlfriend, when I got excited as the doctor told me I should refrain from having sex for the next two months. FML
Today, I woke up with a sore clitoris. I haven't had sex with my boyfriend for weeks, but I did masturbate yesterday. I guess I can't get horny without feeling pain afterwards. FML
Today, I had sex for the first time in two years. With a man I love, who is handsome, very nicely equipped, and quite good at it. I was in pain the entire time. It took me 3 tries to realize there is something physically wrong with me, and once I get it fixed, he'll be gone. FML
Today, my gynecologist was having trouble with my exam due to me being "too tight." I'm 24. After the explanation of having been pretty inactive in over a year, she exclaimed, "Damn, girl, we really need to find you a boyfriend!" Yeah, tell me about it. FML
Today, my wife, who NEVER wants to have sex, decided that now is the time. I, of course, had to take antibiotics that make me so bloated I can’t move without extreme pain. FML
Today, my boyfriend is pushing for sex even though I’ve just had spinal surgery, his reasoning being I only have to lie there, so it’s not like he’s asking me to move or actively participate. He basically wants me to ignore my pain and become a masturbation toy. FML
Today, my wife yelled at me to "just stick it up her ass already." No, not for anal sex, it was a suppository she got from the doctor. This is the closest I’ve been to sex in two years, since she decided we were done having sex and won’t even explain why when I ask. We’re only in our 30s. FML
Today, I'm 8 months pregnant with a horribly sore back and an insensitive husband. I'm so desperate for relief that I'm lying on the couch, using my vibrator to give myself a back massage. FML
Today, I spent the evening with my new wife at the doctor’s because she thought she had a UTI. The doctor sent the nurse to talk to us because he was too embarrassed to tell us that we just needed to use more lube. FML
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Top comments
TheB0a 5
You should get a second opinion might be something else other than you being not loose.
perdix 31
If I were your doctor, I'd tell you just to stick to oral and anal. Let me know if your national health care system up there covers physician-prescribed ******.
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Comments (86)
randymoss 0
He's got a P.h.D in masturbation.
mexipunker 0
Just do what he says and gfy.
spazyman 0
you totally deserve it, you naughty, naughty girl.
wwerulez14 6
You stole my picture... You must die!
ownitx3 0
awe that sucks
iloveloosy12 0
ydi for taking it the wrong way
vbmg152 19
You need a new doctor, something is wrong! Please don't do that you could hurt yourself worse. I've been there, it could be a prolapsed uterus. Get another opinion! Is this guy a Gyn???
DocBastard 40
A prolapsed uterus? No. That doesn't cause pain. This condition is called dyspareunia, and it is a separate condition than vaginismus. There are lots of causes of dyspareunia, including infections, psychological issues, and scarring. In this case it sounds like it's probably due to scarring from a prior episiotomy. In that case, the proper initial treatment would be gentle manual dilation. I'm merely hypothesizing here, because dilation wouldn't be the treatment for vaginismus or any of the infectious causes. I have to assume the infections have been ruled out.
Shenannigoats 16
So, by your logic, she shouldn't stick anything up there, ever?
ImaginaryFoe 1
Just don't do that too much; you'll get a rash.
ulicksam 0
And you know that how?
cufaoil 11
there is another fml on here about a woman going to her doctor, worried that a rash is an std.... her doctor informed her that her skin had dried out through too much masturbation... ImaginaryFoe has also read it
allisonc 5
Your comment about fing yourself was funny but I agree with the other commenters in that you should get another opinion.
afroninjashuffle 0
that's not at all what they r tellin you, they r telling you the truth. if u want tohabe sex so bad, do what the got damn doctor says!
zombieglamour_fml 0
^ epic hair!!
jlawless 0
lol!