Today, my daughter had a vocabulary assignment. She had to find five new words in books and movies. She was watching Shrek, so her first word was "thong". FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Same thing different taste
Stumped
Today, a four-year-old said a word that I didn't know the meaning of. I had to look up the definition. FML
Today, my 4 year-old daughter's favorite expression became "shit balls." FML
Today, my teacher compared the female reproductive system to Shrek's head. Never again will I be able to watch the movies. FML
Today, my daughter said "I love you mom", to me for the first time I can remember. She is 16 years old. She said it because I bought her first thong. FML
Language!
Today, my five year-old sister won't stop saying, "Shit buckle fuckle ton." My boyfriend's excuse was that he was teaching her how to rhyme. FML
Today, I overheard my 5 year old daughter call a girl in her dance class a slut. Shocked, I asked her where she heard that word. Her response: "I heard you and Daddy say it about her Mommy." FML
Today, when I came home, my daughter's baby-sitter was busy smelling my thongs. FML
Today, my mother-in-law started chasing my kids around her house to make them smell her freshly-washed underwear. They were thongs. FML
Today, I was watching the movie Frozen with my 8 year old daughter. I had seen it before, so I sung along with some of the songs. My daughter put a finger over my lips, said "Shhhhhhhhut the fuck up," then turned back to the TV, giggling. FML
It's called fashion, Susan, look it up
Today, my daughter couldn't find a hair tie and thought a piece of duct tape would be a perfectly fine substitute. FML
Top comments
tzemmy 25
Sometimes it's just great how many adult jokes are in kid movies.
Strawburryemma01 14
does she know what it means?
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (66)
missmootoyou 4
Thong means shoe though? I don't understand. Help the confused Australian please
AppleMango 8
I'm Australian too, and honestly I thought that every Australian knows what thong means in America... It's what we'd call a G-string :P
TheYoshiMan 12
'They're briefs!'
jinsy 13
Just give her the Australian definition of thongs which is flip flops
tnebert 8
I'd go with, "a style of underpants; also another name for flip-flops". Kids know about underpants already and will probably just giggle.
jadeyidis 6
Thong is flip flop in Australia
fictionaldiary 11
So? You call her your daughter, so I assume you are her parent. You actually get to tell her what to do until she's 18.