By iliveintexas - 01/09/2012 14:09 - United States - Tyler

Today, my dad wants me to spray a wasp nest, because I'm the fittest family member and can run the fastest. The wasps are already angry, and I'm allergic to them. FML
I agree, your life sucks 28 842
You deserved it 1 850

iliveintexas tells us more.

Hey everyone, in case you're wondering, I have NOT sprayed the nests yet (my dad has informed me there are around 10 nests), but I will be sure to record it, because I am an idiot. PS: Thank you all for the helpful comments, I am aware that I should wear long pants and a long shirt. However (for my favorite comment), in Texas, it is hard to find a cheap steel-forged suit of armor, as well as to craft one. More soon, David (iliveintexas, and author of this FML)

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Top comments

If no one in your family wants to do it, call an exterminator.

I guess being fit has it's down sides too. Lol


If no one in your family wants to do it, call an exterminator.

Do my method... Step 1. Hockey stick with an old shirt on the end. Step 2. Dip the shirt in gasoline. Step 3. Light it on fire. Step 4. Quickly drape the shirt over the nest and run.

Who you gonna call? Waspbusters!!

Wasp stings are no joking matter. Especially with an allergy to them. Why would your dad risk your life like that OP? Tell him to call the exterminator and stop being such a cheap ass.

Calling an exterminator is a good idea, knowing that wasps can kill you if you're allergic to them.

Poetic_Potion 4

Hope your getting paid for it .

#1, Since your dad doesn't seem to care about your health, find out how much an exterminator would charge, then ask dad if your emergency room visit and lost work time would cost more.

philbelfrage 13

With the spray I use it kills the wasps so fast they don't even have the chance to try and sting me. No reason for me to have to run.

mduffy08 8

14 - step 5: Forest fire. Step 6 : Since he's the fastest, he'll be the least likely in his family to get caught by the cops!

My mom got stung by a wasp one time and that area turned black, she's fine now but it was bad, she got MRSA I think also.

Just build a Ghost from StarCraft. "Somebody call for an exterminator?"

All the more reason to run if your allergic lol jk that sucks.

depending on your home, use a blowtorch. Our old place was brick, we use to get a bunch so every so often my husband would torch the hive wasps and all (instant death to everything) and I would give it a sec and hose it down, just in case. Never got stung.

Or maybe hiring an exterminator so that he won't have to use an epipen. :o

Would an epipen even be useful against 100 wasp stings???

Llama_Face89 33

An epipen is only supposed to hold you over until you can get to the ER.

skyeyez9 24

I have allergies and had many reactions. An epipen usually works about 15 mins before it wears off and your throat begins to swell shut again.

OP is from Texas like me, trust me they will be ok. Plus if he/she survives they will have major bragging rights for being ballsy and being "fit", idk lol

83: You're not too bright, are you?

KiddNYC1O 20

Just a bored soldier.

I guess being fit has it's down sides too. Lol

The of what OP's family will do when the zombies come!!!

I wouldn't know.


27, what the fuck are you trying to say?

Psych101 9

27 is trying to say: "Think of what OP's family will do when the zombies come!" Although how you mix up "the" with "think", I have no idea.

iPod auto correct maybe ...

52- The 'e' and the 'i' are not that close together for him to press the wrong button

lexi365 20

Lesson learned. No longer going to the gym haha!

Rddvl 11

I know exterminators can be costly, but I think that would be your best bet OP.

fastest in family doesn't mean fast in general. I feel your pain

Exterminators aren't AS costly as the medical bill after going to the ER with a wasp allergy and 100 wasp stings.

That sucks OP. Atleast they think you're fit! You should probably consider getting a paintball gun and going really far away.. :P

What good will a paintball gun do?

A fun way to take care of business.

Make the wasps even more angry, I suppose... Oh wait that's bad.

Ever seen 1,000 ways to die?

Yeah.. It's called standing far away? He was dumb and stood right next to it lol.

MichellinMan 20

Pull out the flamethrower.


Deodorant can + lighter = flamethrower

Calling a professional would be cheaper than a visit to the ER. I'm allergic to bees also so when I see one I run for dear life! There's no chance in hell I would attempt to remove a nest.

mrdinofly 6

Burn it with fire

A flame thrower will do nicely!

I'm sure they have some at the convenience store...

I set fire to your hive Watched it burn while I hid inside

Not sure why this is thumbed down, because fire works very well for this type of thing. Provided you aren't an idiot and you know how to control your fire...

Get spraying pal

That spray should kill them instantly, if you ate using the stuff that sprays 20 feet you should be ok. But I would go for the exterminator or see if one of your friends will do it. Or flamethrower.

Ate? O_o Hopefully you mean 'are'.