Miscellaneous: Today, my cousin came to visit from America. While out shopping,... - FML

By Anonymous - 09/09/2010 14:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my cousin came to visit from America. While out shopping, she said loudly that she was having trouble finding clothes to fit around her huge fanny, causing a lot of people to stare in our direction. I had to explain to her that "fanny" in the UK means "vagina." FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 581

You deserved it 4 484

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Same thing different taste

By Chubs - 29/03/2009 12:32 - Norway

Today, I was playing with my kid cousin outside. It was warm, so I was wearing my new bikini, and felt pretty good about myself. She suddenly turns to me and asks, "How come your tits are so small when you have such a big belly?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 73 356

You deserved it 11 656

Silver linings

By Anonymous - 07/10/2009 01:11 - Canada

Today, I went shopping for a new pair of jeans. I was feeling good about the fact that I was going down a waist size until the cashier decided to discuss with me, three co-workers, and the ten other people in line how she didn't even know jeans came in sizes that big. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 476

You deserved it 6 836

Nice boxers

By Harmonia - 26/01/2009 10:09 - France

Today, I went shopping with my boyfriend. He tried on a pair of trousers which didn't fit, so he asked me to change them, so off I went. I returned with another pair for him to try on, found him bent over and blurted out, "What's with the terrible underwear?" I'd entered the wrong changing room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 895

You deserved it 9 559

You little knob

By keelah - 27/06/2014 21:57 - United States - Montgomery

Today, my cousin asked me what it's like to be so fat. I chastised him and said that was a rude thing to ask. He apologized, then asked me what it's like to be such a pussy. He didn't stop until he, a 10 year-old kid, had reduced me, a 26 year-old woman, to tears. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 713

You deserved it 8 604

Flattered

By Creeped out - 28/01/2013 08:14 - New Zealand - Auckland

Today, I was trying on some shoes. As I was bending down, an old lady with a walking frame slowly approached. As she got close she whispered to me, "Mmm, you've got a nice tushie." My girlfriend will not let me hear the end of it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 218

You deserved it 3 714

Holy eyesight, Batman!

By Anonymous - 05/08/2023 22:00

Today, I thought a cute guy was checking out my ass, so I cheekily bent over a little to give him an eyeful. He walked over to a shop assistant, pointed at me and left. The assistant then informed me, “Miss, you’ve torn your trousers, your knickers are visible, and, um, apparently you have a skid mark.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 266

You deserved it 1 248

By no boobies - 29/05/2013 16:39 - United States

Today, while shopping for dresses, I found a really cute one that fit me really well, but not at all in the breast area. My grandma screamed "buy her some titties!" Everyone in the store looked at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 763

You deserved it 4 377

By Anonymous - 31/10/2014 10:55 - United Kingdom - Pontypridd

Today, my boyfriend told my four-year-old sister that "fatass" means "beautiful lady." I didn't know about this until I took my sister shopping with me. The woman at the till said she was adorable; my sister replied, "Thanks, fatass." FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 628

You deserved it 3 320

By xkellybabyyx - 25/11/2009 01:05 - United States

Today, I was walking through the streets with my best friend, feeling confident in my new skinny jeans. My friend said, "you really should be wearing a thong with those pants, your underwear line is showing". I was wearing a thong, those lines were just my fat rolls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 912

You deserved it 40 677

By Sammylad - 07/09/2011 22:14 - United Kingdom

Today, I was giving a talk in class, when halfway through someone pointed out that my pubes were sticking out my trousers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 928

You deserved it 15 377

Next

Top comments

WiseGuy79 14

Thursday 9 September 2010 19:15

So I'm guessing they don't call those lil waist pouches "fanny packs" in the UK lol

carleigh2424 0

Thursday 9 September 2010 19:02

Hahahhaaaaa!:)

Comments

Snowlight_fml 7

Sunday 12 September 2010 20:24

What does fanny mean in the US ._.

MetalFish 0

Sunday 12 September 2010 23:13

Read the comments before asking a question, this has been asked about 4 times

jjblastoff9 0

Monday 13 September 2010 5:33

lol that would be great

Arbiter329 0

Tuesday 14 September 2010 5:35

Huh, did not know that.

yeahreally 6

Saturday 25 September 2010 19:28

And thus explains the fanny pack. Learning something new everyday

Hazu_fml 0

Thursday 30 September 2010 8:22

lol

mad_hatter0666 22

Wednesday 13 October 2010 3:36

lol!!!! too funny!

fuzion50 6

Tuesday 23 November 2010 7:55

I feel sorry for all the little Irish girls who have the name fanny........

MCKCWHITETIGER 0

Sunday 20 February 2011 16:24

stupid Americans. UK FTW!

badfood 0

Tuesday 15 March 2011 0:19

**** you #275

Niki0308 0

Thursday 31 March 2011 22:44

fail!!! it means butt... 

Lily_Loretta 0

Sunday 1 May 2011 0:15

You fail. It doesn't mean that in the UK, as stated in the fml.

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Today, after an argument, my boyfriend called me a fart knocker and gave me a wedgie. Apparently, I'm dating an 10-year-old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 614

You deserved it 1 065

Today, while at work for a dog groomer, I picked up a new puppy that came in for a groom. I held it up at face level with me, baby talking it, when it promptly began peeing. Luckily, it didn't get on my clothes. Unluckily, it got onto my face and into my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 766

You deserved it 2 034

Today, my mom won’t stop calling up all her friends and family and even telling complete strangers about my "bowel problems." Even at parties, she talks about my pooping habits every chance she gets. This isn’t what I want to be known for. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 200

You deserved it 116

Today, due to my blood pressure, I've begun getting an agonising migraine every time I get increased heart rate from arousal. We’re supposed to be trying for our first baby, but we’ve not had successful sex in weeks because I can’t last until orgasm before I feel like my head is splitting open. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 013

You deserved it 176

Today, I got back home to my completely locked-up apartment after a long and stressful family visit. On digging through my nice clean clothes for something comfy to change into, I was set upon and stung by a great dirty wasp hiding in there. How the fuck did it get in? Are there more of them in here with me?! FML

I agree, your life sucks 749

You deserved it 132

Today, I walked outside my house to find my father in nothing but his underwear, spraying ants with ant-killer, laughing like a maniac and screaming, "Die bitches! Die!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 568

You deserved it 4 811