Today, my car was in the shop so I borrowed my wife's VW Beetle convertible. It's really embarrassing because it's a girlie car and it's full of little stuffed animals. At a stop light a man asked me if I'd like to borrow one of his testicles because "every man should have at least one." FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, after working and saving up money for an entire year, I bought a 2001 VW Cabrio. I showed it to my friends, they all laughed at me and told me it was a girl's car. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were driving around town in his car. To my surprise he took me out to lunch. As we were leaving, a girl walks up and asks if he had room for one more for a ride, sadly he only has two seats in his car. Guess who had to walk! FML
Today, my girlfriend's dad let me borrow his car for transportation to work because mine got totaled. This car is a complete dump and I've realized he's only letting me use it so it's my fault to fix the broken things on the car. So far, I've had to replace the battery and two popped tires. FML
Today, I bought a used car from a friend of mine. After getting the car home and further inspecting it, I found one of my wife's earrings in the backseat. FML
Today, after months of convincing from my friends, I finally bought a car they claimed would be a chick magnet. Wrong kind of "chick," mates. FML
Today, I asked my girlfriend what her favorite quality about me was. Her answer, "Your car." FML
Today, I was working as a service writer in an auto service shop. A really cute girl came in to buy a headlight, I offered to install the bulb for her. My hand got stuck behind the headlight, she had to ask one of our mechanics to come remove the air box from her car to get my hand out. FML
Today, I drove home in my brand new car, hoping to surprise my girlfriend. She came out the house laughing, saying how funny it was, and how I look like a "twollop" in it. Then in all seriousness, she asked me when I was getting my "actual car" back from the garage. FML
Today, a friend was making fun of our teacher's car, calling it dorkmobile and saying only idiots would own that car. It's the same as the car I just bought. FML
Today, my wife got me a car for my birthday. It's a nice one but I soon realized it's a trap: I have to take her everywhere, or she tells me she can take it back anytime. So much for a gift. FML
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Top comments
evilmatty93 0
That guy had THE BEST CALL EVER! .... you got owned, big time.
hamzy 0
Lol, gotta appreciate the humor. :D
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Comments (281)
Indiana_fml 4
#63 He can laugh about it, he is even able to share it with the whole world over a website which belongs to the thousand most popular websites on this planets under the self-deprecating username "NoBalls". If he didn't think there were something comical to it, it wouldn't have made any sense at all to him to submit it. So why do you assume that his "soul was so injured by it" and that he "didn't know what a joke is"? Because *you* would be like that in that situation. But this FML isn't about you. In fact, no one cares about that you would be devastated and all bitchy in his situation. I don't care too, I'm just annoyed by the fact that people like you insult the OPs for either not presenting human tragedies or for having a greater sense of humour than you. Grow some balls!
dragonmystik3030 0
stop being a ungreatful wanker and ******* walk if ya dont like it :) mind you the guy was right lol
ILIEKGIRLS 5
i envy that guy XD
Verenek 0
ROFL thats freaking funny!
MIKENYC 0
Why is ur wife driving a girly car? Get her a black hummer
shanbam 0
I drive a beetle, but surprisingly enough I see more men driving beetles than I see women. :)
jncwmnd 0
LOL! love it though you could've kocked all the stuffed animals to the ground.....just a thought
genius_man16 0
#37 really? Women like *you* are so unbelievably unattractive too. You probably don't watch Home Improvement or something because it's too sexist. Really, there is a line between being super macho manly and making a joke to a fellow dude. That line was not crossed, pull the tree trunk out of your ass and go get a sense of humor. @OP: That is ****** hilarious, I agree with all those saying that the dude is awesome and my hero, haha.
whatev5297 0
if you are really a man, who is secure in his masulinity and everything, you would have no problem with that
JTDBL 0
That is hilarious. Sucks for you though.