Today, my boyfriend, who is a great cook, decided to try his hand at baking. The cookies he made looked weird but tasted good. I jokingly said, "They taste great, but they look awful!" He responded by saying, "I could say the same thing about you." FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I told my boyfriend that I was sad I'd forgotten to bake him the cookies that I was planning to send to him for Christmas. His response was "Good, you suck at cooking anyway." FML
Today, as I watched my boyfriend bake cookies, I said he was "domesticated." He looked at me like I'd just pissed on his mother's grave and has been cold and distant all evening. What the fuck? It's a compliment, you dick. FML
Today, I surprised my boyfriend by baking him some cookies for the first time. He took a bite and said, "Wow, these taste exactly like the ones my mom used to make!" I couldn't bring myself to admit that I'd used a store-bought mix, because I can’t bake to save my life. FML
Today, I baked my boyfriend his favorite cookies for his birthday. Well, I tried. I followed the recipe, but they somehow turned out diamond hard. When he tried to bite into one, he chipped a tooth. Instead of being mad, he laughed and said, “At least you tried.” Now I’m stuck with inedible cookies and a dentist's bill. FML
Today, my boyfriend compared me to an unattractive actress. When I said it was sort of messed up to say that to me since she's not pretty, he said, "She's not as bad as you." FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were out shopping. As he was trying on shirts, I told him that the particular shirt he was wearing looked ugly. He turned around, sighed, and said "You think? Well, your face is ugly, but you don't see me complaining about it." He was serious. FML
Today, I was talking to my boyfriend, feeling pretty low. I said something along the lines of, "You like me even when I look like shit." He replied, "Ah, that's just how you naturally look." FML
Today, my boyfriend said he felt like eating icing. So I baked him cupcakes, put icing on them and decorated them. When I handed them to him, he picked off the decoration, licked the icing and handed the cupcake back to me, saying, "I told you that's all I wanted." FML
Today, I overheard my boyfriend and his friends talking in the next room. I smiled when my boyfriend called me beautiful, only to hear his friend laugh and say, "C'mon, dude. She has fat ankles and smells like deli meat." FML
Today, I tried baking my own bread to save food money. Unfortunately I screwed it up, prompting my wife to look at me pityingly and say "Wow, can't get even bread to rise." before walking out. I have erectile dysfunction, and she constantly insults me like this. FML
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Top comments
DrAwesome 6
You know, that whole conversation really was... *puts on sunglasses* ... in bad taste.
Micayla 12
Aww! Thats mean xD You deserve it for making fun of his cookies(:
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Comments (108)
iRadiium 0
haha don't make fun of his cooking :p
skyeyez9 25
Maye he was trying to make some scary halloween cookies, the shape didn't turn out like he anticipated.
varkey 7
your bf is a cannibal?? ydi for not dumping him
elmorous 0
My dirty friend Sanchez has served that up on occasion.
elmorous 0
81 was supposed to be in response to 66 ...
minty1807 9
you clearly hurt his feelings..
blowkiss 0
is he your ex boyfriend by now? xD
RKD 23
What a jerk! And oversensitive, too! Your bf, I mean!
gigilvrs6 0
At least you taste great?
FML191919 3
FACE!!!!!!!!!