Today, my boyfriend, who is a great cook, decided to try his hand at baking. The cookies he made looked weird but tasted good. I jokingly said, "They taste great, but they look awful!" He responded by saying, "I could say the same thing about you." FML
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Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, I told my boyfriend that I was sad I'd forgotten to bake him the cookies that I was planning to send to him for Christmas. His response was "Good, you suck at cooking anyway." FML
Today, as I watched my boyfriend bake cookies, I said he was "domesticated." He looked at me like I'd just pissed on his mother's grave and has been cold and distant all evening. What the fuck? It's a compliment, you dick. FML
Today, I surprised my boyfriend by baking him some cookies for the first time. He took a bite and said, "Wow, these taste exactly like the ones my mom used to make!" I couldn't bring myself to admit that I'd used a store-bought mix, because I can’t bake to save my life. FML
Today, I baked my boyfriend his favorite cookies for his birthday. Well, I tried. I followed the recipe, but they somehow turned out diamond hard. When he tried to bite into one, he chipped a tooth. Instead of being mad, he laughed and said, “At least you tried.” Now I’m stuck with inedible cookies and a dentist's bill. FML
Today, my boyfriend compared me to an unattractive actress. When I said it was sort of messed up to say that to me since she's not pretty, he said, "She's not as bad as you." FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were out shopping. As he was trying on shirts, I told him that the particular shirt he was wearing looked ugly. He turned around, sighed, and said "You think? Well, your face is ugly, but you don't see me complaining about it." He was serious. FML
Today, I was talking to my boyfriend, feeling pretty low. I said something along the lines of, "You like me even when I look like shit." He replied, "Ah, that's just how you naturally look." FML
Today, my boyfriend said he felt like eating icing. So I baked him cupcakes, put icing on them and decorated them. When I handed them to him, he picked off the decoration, licked the icing and handed the cupcake back to me, saying, "I told you that's all I wanted." FML
Today, I overheard my boyfriend and his friends talking in the next room. I smiled when my boyfriend called me beautiful, only to hear his friend laugh and say, "C'mon, dude. She has fat ankles and smells like deli meat." FML
Today, I tried baking my own bread to save food money. Unfortunately I screwed it up, prompting my wife to look at me pityingly and say "Wow, can't get even bread to rise." before walking out. I have erectile dysfunction, and she constantly insults me like this. FML
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Top comments
DrAwesome 6
You know, that whole conversation really was... *puts on sunglasses* ... in bad taste.
Micayla 12
Aww! Thats mean xD You deserve it for making fun of his cookies(:
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Comments (108)
DrAwesome 6
You know, that whole conversation really was... *puts on sunglasses* ... in bad taste.
TheLetterZero 7
YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!
starile 20
Omg where have you been??
DrAwesome 6
8-hour bus trip home from college. Didn't really have time to contribute, but I've finally got some down time. Thanks for wondering. :3
TheTrueDarkness 0
Epic win. But,yeah, OP, that was a little harsh.
xiaoxaio 5
YEAAAA!!
StewieBigFan 0
Do women have no sense of humor? He was obviously joking. -_-
42billybob 5
^ | | This. Seriously, people don't say stuff like that in seriousness unless they've been planning on breaking up with you for a while, or seriously upset.
deepunder 17
I feel he was dead serious. Would u like getting complemented for an excellent presentation, then ignored because of your face?
jess2gd4u 0
lol made me literally laugh out loud. ur man is a sooky brat. what a girl getting all defensive about that. lol.
hghiPigh 0
is this some sort of a cheap ploy to let the fml population think you taste good?
elmorous 0
perhaps, but I would avoid the hollandaise sauce
yourlifesfucked 0
but hollandaise goes so well with fish... see what I did there?
SwiftKick2DA 0
atleast you taste good.
maphineRAWRS 10
hahaha, win to your boyfriend :)
alex1432 9
Is it just me but are gender roles not really followed as much nowadays.
NJXD 0
haha
tuxedoandex 28
he was just ******* trying to bake cookies, it's not anything special ok
mrahhhhh 21
I could say the same thing about... Mashed cornbread. That stuff looks like little kid vomit but is incredibly delicious. Now I want thanksgiving to come already! :( Too bad nobody passes out cornbread on Halloween night. :'(. *cries in corner* Anyway I'll stop rambling now.
TheIrishJaneDoe 9
Mm, 32. Ever had corn pudding? That's some yummy shit. Sidenote: Please ignore the double-post. My app's wonking out, and I guess the reply feature doesn't work so hot on the mobile site. =
cbnano12 0
What double post?
waveman56 3
well on the bright side.... you taste great
sarah48_fml 0
well you shouldn't of criticized him op, even jokingly. he's new to baking give him a break.. you're lucky to have a boyfriend that cooks for you.
noshtsherlock 0
agreed.
hassouni 0
35 = win