Today, my boyfriend texted me, saying, "I'm running a bath. Wanna come over and learn about water displacement?" I excitedly drove over, thinking he wanted to have some fun. No, he really did want to teach me about water displacement. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I thought my boyfriend wanted to be romantic by pouring a bath, getting in then calling me in. As I get comfortable, he stands up and gets out. At the same time, I notice yellow water. He'd pissed in the tub for a joke. FML
Today, my boyfriend looked at me and suggestively told me to take a shower. He's leaving for two days so I humored him, thinking he wanted to do it in the shower. I waited for 20 minutes before he knocked on the door, telling me he needed to shower as well. He just wanted me to take a shower. FML
Today, I was texting my boyfriend and things were getting a little steamy. He said, "I really want you right now." So, of course, I told him to come over. To which he replied, "Nah." FML
Today, my boyfriend started freaking out about how his penis floats in water. Baths with him will never be the same again. FML
Today, my boyfriend pointed out that the water bill is getting kind of high. I suggested that we shower together to save water. He said he'd rather deal with the high water bill. FML
Today, I caught my boyfriend in the bathtub interrogating his penis and "drowning" it when it wouldn't answer him. FML
Today, my husband and I were talking about how we missed our sexting from when we were dating, so later I took a bath and texted him while he was relaxing in bed. His response ? "I'm tired and hurry up I need to poop." FML
Today, I sent my boyfriend a text asking him to come over a little later and have some "fun" with me. He texted back, "WTF babe? Breaking Bad's on tonight. You got a dildo, fucking use it." FML
Today, my boyfriend decided to come over and surprise me. When he got to my apartment and heard the shower running, he decided get in and join me. I was walking my dog, my mother is in town for the weekend. FML
Today, I was feeling horny, so I told my boyfriend, who lives 30 minutes away, that "I really needed him". He replied, "Did you fall in the toilet again?" FML
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Top comments
DragonzCreator 3
It just goes to show, guys aren't always thinking about sex.
Psych101 9
Hopefully you learned something. Both about water displacement and how literal your boyfriend is.
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Comments (179)
supportcommand 17
Everybody should know about water displacement. What if your on a small boat and a fattie is going to get on too? You'll be the wise one that says "wait, if you get on we'll displace too much water and sink". Everyone will praise you.
supportcommand 17
Oops. * you're.
cameronman9 2
Saw that one coming
Axipiter 24
Or didn't see anything coming?
SweetAsHell 9
*sigh* Not every guy who likes science is like Sheldon from BBT. Broaden your horizon of characters, my kittens.
justanotherhuman 21
^ true. The rest of us are the CSI/NCIS crew; hotties using science to right wrongs.
winnerme123 8
Can I come?
astronomydomine 2
You should have taken off your shirt, dunked your boobs in the bath and asked, "how much water do my boobs displace?" He would have asked you to marry him right then and there!
Commonsense1989 2
well thats one reason too dump your bf their is other fish in the sea but in your case the bath tub
Axipiter 24
This comment hurt to read.
thecovert 7
You can't help idiots.
TheSasmaster 9
That's funny because I'm actually learning about water displacement in chemistry right now :D lol
smileycupcake62 4
that.is.HILARIOUS.
SirEskimo 13
UGH WOW, A RELATIONSHIP ISN'T ALWAYS ABOUT SEX, YOU SHOULD CHERISH THE TIME SPENT WITH YOUR BOYFRIEND!!!!!
dustyb555 1
Knowledge is key. :-D