By lendahandmanda - 24/02/2010 00:01 - United States

Spicy
Today, I drunkenly hooked up with my friend's cousin. After trying to stick his finger up my butt, he blacked out on top of me with his penis still hard inside me. I tried yelling his name and pushing him off, with no success. I ended up having to call my friend to help me. FML
I agree, your life sucks 10 966
You deserved it 27 858

lendahandmanda tells us more.

Not only was he a pretty muscular guy, but his arms were pinning mine down to a point, and i had no leverage laying in the position I was in. To those of you saying I should have just waited til he woke up, he was sort of choking me, his head was under my chin pressed against my neck, and I felt like I was being suffocated, and his body on top of mine was making it difficult for me to breathe. It might have just been anxiety though. I probably could have stuck through it.

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ewww, that's quite classless.

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hopefully he didn't 'finish' inside you or ekes that would be another point for drunkin pregnacys.

That's just nasty why would you be that easy it's just sick.

...now you can have a little drunk baby.

snickerdoodles alcohol makes everything fun well if you don't drink to much cause then you feel like shit

so true. slut, right?

@14 lots of people r easy wen they're drunk.

that's just disgusting. did you have to include the "still hard" detail.

Today, I was having sex with this drunk chick, I was about to come and needed something to grab So I reached for her butt, i passed out because of the lack of blood in my brain, I couldn't pull out and she doesn't know it. FML

@53 SHE wasn't the drunk one!

sorry snick, misread drunkenly

At no point does she say that he was about to come or came or anything like that nor does she say that they didn't use protection. They might have used protection and therefore this encounter will not end with a little drunk baby. Read before you start assuming stuff.

whiterose u obviously don't understand. the point of that so shut up

foxhound you totally used the wrong spelling. when your about to bust it's spelt cum.

don't feel so bad. dogs get "stuck" all the time

This does not make her easy. One hookup does not make someone easy.

OP: whatcha doin'? Drunk guy: Eatin' chocolate OP: where'd you find it?

He was too heavy to move but you were able to move enough to reach a phone to call your friend?

omfg, I won't even begin to correct your epic failure.....

FYL!!!that is embarrasing.

Most amazing FML eveerrr! U rock!

i second the people who disliked the guy who seconded this

ewww, that's quite classless.

Hmmm. well, fuck you for not drinking grog! :)

I agree, best FML ever lmao

Nah, the best FML is the one in which a kid's mother's soda exploded and his dad was yelling at her to put it in her mouth and suck it.

it's not too hard to push a person off of u...how weak can you be?

dude was probably 400 pounds like Jared before the Subway diet

Did you ever think that maybe the guy might be built? Muscle weighs heavier than fat and therefore OP might have a problem pushing him off if he is a gym whore who's in there 6 days a week. Think next time.

Not only was he a pretty muscular guy, but his arms were pinning mine down to a point, and i had no leverage laying in the position I was in. To those of you saying I should have just waited til he woke up, he was sort of choking me, his head was under my chin pressed against my neck, and I felt like I was being suffocated, and his body on top of mine was making it difficult for me to breathe. It might have just been anxiety though. I probably could have stuck through it.

haha. yes

serves you right for being a slut.

and you??