Today, my boyfriend started to kiss my boobs. I am pregnant and started my lactation period. Now every time he looks at me he calls me milky way. FML
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Today, my boyfriend started to suck on my boob, which I quite enjoy, until he said he was breastfeeding and called me "Mummy". I don't think I can ever let his mouth near my boobs ever again. FML
Today, I was woken up by my husband attempting to breastfeed off my lactating nipples. FML
Today, I was making out with my boyfriend whilst straddled on top of him. He started to undo my bra. I was fine with this but he stopped kissing me and looked at me with a slight smile. He then said, "I know this is going to kill the mood... but I feel like I could milk your boobs right now" FML
Today, I caught my pregnant wife trying to suck milk from her breasts. FML
Today, my husband and I were having sex for the first time since I had our son. As I was riding him in a heated passion, he grabbed my breasts. Milk literally shot out onto his face. Mood totally ruined. FML
Today, I announced my pregnancy to my husband. He responded with, "Well shit, when do these faucets turn on?" and started honking my boobs. FML
Today, my sister started lactating through her shirt post-breastfeeding at a family brunch. My husband, who gets turned on by pregnant women since he gets the most action during my pregnancies, visibly ogled her at the table. FML
Today, I was laying in bed with my boyfriend. He started caressing me, his eyes were closed, and he said, “I love touching your boobs.” Which was actually a roll of fat on my stomach. FML
Today, while my boyfriend and I were cuddling on the couch, he looked down at my chest and said, "I can't wait for the day that these produce milk." We've only been dating a few months, and I have no intention of lactating anytime soon. FML
Today, when done feeding my newborn, I stated to my husband that I'm a cow. He said, in a sincere tone, "Oh, baby, you'll lose the weight soon." I meant cow because I'm producing so much milk. FML
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Top comments
fadingaway 17
Kick him in the nuts and call him nutcracker.
Ariasmake_1 0
at least your boyfriend has a sense of humor
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Comments (142)
steelcityhunni 0
u dont lactate while pregnant!! u get colostrum right before you give birth....
westsidewhite 0
wow ******.funny
Darnie 0
thats hot
ajroxs91 0
I'm so srry, dang if my bf (who likes it, yes i'm too) said that, that would be the last thing he siad to me till at less 3 months after the baby was born.
Sunfloria 0
Kinda his fault for kissing you there while you're lactating. lol
breenarae25 0
WTF your prego n not married...
Ashleigh96 0
if he said it in a sweet kinda way it'd be cute like your his little 'milky way' :D
xchyennex 0
I know the feeling. my milk has just come in.
momianajones 0
fake. lactation does not happen until after the baby is born. you are making this up. why?
daeemann 1
Ha ha. That seems hot. Kinky but hot. Too many teeny boppers here complaining about the fact that she's preggo and not married. News flash, once you're in your midtwenties and finished college, people sometimes decide to live together before marriage and they may end up having kids. Also, you get charged for getting a marriage license and they economy is pretty bad. People may be living together and are practically married but they're looking for the right time when money is in the bank to get married.