Today, my boyfriend had a bad dream that a horse was biting his fingers off. He punched the horse in the neck, and in real life punched me in the spine. Twice. FML
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Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, my boyfriend and I were asleep. Evidently, he was dreaming about being a UFC fighter, because, out of no where, he grabs the back of my head and punches me in the nose. I haven't been able to breathe right out of my nose all day. FML
Today, in the middle of the night, my fiancé started yelling gibberish in his sleep. When I tried to wake him, he punched me square in the face. FML
Today, my boyfriend was telling me about accidentally punching his best friend in the face. As he was acting it out he ended up punching me and giving me a bloody nose. FML
Today, I was thrown from a horse. Thankfully, there was a trainer there to break my fall and prevent serious injury. Instead of being concerned for my safety or even grateful, my boyfriend flew into a rage that the trainer’s hands had brushed my breasts while saving me. FML
Today, I woke up my girlfriend up with a cute kiss. She was apparently having a bad dream and headbutted me. FML
Today, my dad tried to help me overcome my intense fear of horses (due to nearly being killed by one as a child) by taking me to a ranch. Within 30 minutes, a horse bit my face. FML
Today, I went horseback riding with this guy I like. I asked him to help me get on the horse. I slipped, and while trying to keep my balance, I kicked him in the face. FML
Today, I was awoken to a punch in the face. My boyfriend said I was giggling in my sleep and he thought I was possessed. FML
Today, my fiancé had a nightmare and sat bolt upright in bed, claimed he had a nightmare where we were married, then his head hit the pillow and he was asleep again. That was his nightmare. Us being married. FML
Today, I lay in bed reflecting on my fiancé's complaint about my lack of displays of affection. I felt terrible, so I rolled over and hugged him in his sleep. He's a fully trained martial artist and his immediate reaction was to try to snap my neck. FML
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Top comments
Doortje 30
Bite his fingers off.
fountaindn4 0
should have shoved a carrot down his throat after the first time
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Comments (103)
loopdyir 1
lol sooo funny :P
KickItHigh 32
Omg when i was little, i had to sleep with my grandma because we were sort of poor at the time and the apartment only had two rooms. I had this dream, and i dont remember what it was about but i got mad at my sister in the dream and ended up punching my grandma in the face when i woke up from it -.-
Azarjan 0
C-c-c-combo breaker..... Fatality
Denimpuppy 0
Flawless Victory XD
NadiG7 2
LMBOOOOOO....AHAHA...OH MAN 2 FUNNY... BUT SORRY 2 HEAR THAT AHAHAHAHAHA
icantellu 7
I own a horse.
wakeNmakePIZZA 0
so what was the "mouth" her ass or pussy
omgitsmeaja 3
punch him back!!
momma_jess20 0
omg this is ****** hilarous! hope ur spine is ok lol
CrazyMe2524 0
iLmao !:)
lily389 0
For the record, I'm perfectly fine, and he just felt terrible. And I never actually bit anything, he was laying on his hand funny and I was just sleeping in front if him facing the other way. I believe I said "WTF" very loudly and he woke up.