By imnotacheateryouimmaturefuck - 27/11/2012 01:41 - United States - San Mateo

Today, my boyfriend dumped me by throwing my stuff out of his place, and accusing me of cheating while yelling, "Cheater, cheater! Pumpkin eater!" When I tried explaining that I have no clue what he's talking about, he started exclaiming, "Liar, liar! Pants on fire!" FML
I agree, your life sucks 29 488
You deserved it 3 418

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Top comments

Your username says it all!

There once was an OP who lived in a shoe. Her boyfriend said she cheated, and gave her the boot. Little did she know, she was dating Dr. Suess, And shouldn't give a damn about losing her boo.

Comments

sounds like a lil kid

Sounds like a lil kid, says "missbaby".

At this rate you you should've cheated on him. But hey, maybe this is fate's way of telling you to go find yourself a real man.

Why would you talk to missbaby or kyleekay like that? That's not very nice. This is Pleonasm's way of saying find yourself a real thread.

26 - You're talking to me about not being very nice when you're not being very nice yourself? Well okay, the irony sure made me learn my lesson.

30- I really don't see the irony.

Man, and now you're ruining the word irony? "Irony" isn't applicable in every situation, you know. It would be "hypocrisy", except that it isn't because I didn't tell you to be nice I said get you're own thread, I was not serious when I told you not to talk to the others that way: I was deliberately mis-interpreting the target of your message since you didn't address it to OP. Gosh.

Pleonasm, that typo is making me twitch... I... I can't help it... *your

35 - Whatever you say :)

Oh shit, aw balls, it's all ruined :(

Turn that frown upside down:)

Link5794 18

You're new here, aren't you?

Next time try to date a man.

36 - *pats you on the back* their there they're

Pleonasm, from what I've gathered from your comments you appear to be one of those self righteous college students who think they know everything because of their "wide" vocabulary and knowledge of basic English. By the way, I HATE puns.

Well, Pleonasm, I find you punny :)

107 - If you hate puns, you couldn't have picked a worse website to hang out on.

Holy Santa clause shit, 107 I honestly didn't know one could hate puns. Even if you DISLIKE them you're bound to laugh at them at some point in time.

I'm sure his parents are so proud, they have their little brat back.

Your username says it all!

Pretty much. At least she knows who's what. But I think OP might go to jail for dating a little kid. Seriously how old is your bf OP?

71- I'm not sure if that was a joke...

73- I really hope it was.

I'm wondering how old this guy is... cause he sounds like he's 8 or so.

No, I think he's 27.

This guy reminds me of Crazy Steve from Drake & Josh "COCK A DOODLE DOO, THE COW GOES MOO."

There once was an OP who lived in a shoe. Her boyfriend said she cheated, and gave her the boot. Little did she know, she was dating Dr. Suess, And shouldn't give a damn about losing her boo.

I read that in Cat in the Hat's voice :3

winkydog4056 16

#17_What is a golf clap? Is that the STD one gets by banging Tiger Woods?

58 - A golf clap is what you do at golf tournaments. It's just really quiet.

winkydog4056 16

#64_Grassy Ass for the explanation -Wanky Dog

None of these words rhyme. *downer*

58- it's just a quiet, somewhat slow clap.

Omgee. I'm glad I'm not the only one who read it in Seuss voice. :3

Trix, it's Dr. Seuss. The words don't have to rhyme. Because it's Dr. Seuss. And he is awesome. End of story.

Were you dating a 5 year old?

Dude. Your profile picture is downright disturbing.

Stop looking at his profile.

You don't need to look at someone's profile to see their profile picture, smart one.

Just for the record, I was replying to 34.

34 is just repeating what his about me section says, just with the different pronouns. I thought it was clever. :)

*her actually. I just went through 34's profile lol, congrats on the baby and engagement, 34!

Haha way to be a creeper, 48 xD although I do agree with you, congrats:)

Sucks, but you're better off without this looney..

There, there, it'll be ok. Hopefully your barbie dolls are here to comfort you. DId you tell your mum about this little meenie? Now, don't stay up too late, and remember to do your homework!

The maturity level of OP's now ex doesn't necessarily reflect OP's age. Maybe she's just a cougar.

There's no need to alert the authoriti-... erm i mean mommy poo, just yet. I'm sure this will all be resolved by nap time.

Someone deserves a time out to think about what he's said. On a side note; what's wrong with being a pumpkin eater? These are the holidays for it after all. Yumm.

Someone deserves a time out to think about what he's said. On a side note; what's wrong with being a pumpkin eater? These are the holidays for it after all. Yumm.

Say "sorry, I don't date children" and dump him. If he really is going to act like that, you're better off without him.

how exactly can you dump someone if they have already dumped you?

I misread the fml. Whoops! xD New solution: kick him in the balls.

you beg them to go back out with you and then when they finally agree you turn it around and say "sorry i dont date children." then you walk away with your pride

How bout the anus it will hurt like hell

61- I still think kicking him in the balls, like pokefan said, would hurt more.

You were probably too immature for him (hopes obvious sarcasm is obvious)

Sounds like he needs his nap.