Today, my boyfriend decided that vaginal, oral, and anal sex are starting to get boring. Let's just say that my armpit is now drenched in lube. I'm afraid of what he's going to want to try once he gets bored of this. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I agreed to anal with my boyfriend, but when I told him anal takes prep, like stretching and lubing, and you can’t just jam a knob up there like in a porno, he lost all interest, asked for a blowjob, and when I said no, he started sulking. I struggle to remember why I’m with him. FML
Today, in an attempt to spice things up a bit, my boyfriend and I discovered he takes it in the butt better than I do. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me he doesn't like having sex with me, because I get too wet and it makes him go limp. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me he’d rather masturbate than have sex with me, and that sex with me is a chore. FML
Today, I finally had sex with my live-in boyfriend after a long dry spell. It was passionate and great, until I hurt my back changing positions. Now he refuses to touch me, going as far as sleeping on the couch to give me "enough space". Hello new dry spell. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me that I don't have a "grippy vagina" after he slipped out for the third time. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me that he gets more pleasure out of using a Q-tip than he does having sex with me. FML
Today, my drunk boyfriend told me he thought of new positions for us to try in bed because it was getting boring. We haven't had sex yet. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I decided to try anal sex. When he was done, I turned around to see him holding a strap-on with a smile on his face and said 'Now, do me'. FML
Today, during sex, my boyfriend found it appropriate to tell me he loves "how bad" I smell. FML
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Top comments
ccsmilvr 0
Wow that does suck, but why would you let him do that in the first place ??
mrbattleman 10
maybe ear sex? once you go black, you go deaf
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Comments (337)
resplendencerino_fml 3
for christs sake learn to stand up for yourself and say no. if he's bored then it's probably his fault for resorting to something as retarded as armpit sex instead of trying new positions, toys,etc. remember, you're not his **** toy- sex is supposed to be mutually pleasureable so find something to do that you both enjoy
marisadc79 0
Think I'd have to rethink whether I'm in a normal relationship. Come on, a guy getting tired of all three and going for the armpit! Something is wrong with that boy. Guard your nose and ears lol.
Justin23L 2
What about jelly roll sex?
platypus546 24
How low is your self esteem?
devourerofbooks 10
Nothing goes wrong with a blindfold and fuzzy cuffs(for beginners). Just blind fold him and ride him. Can't get bored once you explore more.
tmrwisanotherday 1
I guess it can get boring when your back hole becomes as big as you're front hole.
DelphiCat 17
YDI for agreeing to that weirdness! its not like its going to get you off in any way, and if you're willing to do everything else tell him to man the F*** up and do you properly.
Spazz420 7
The knee is the 4th hole!! lmao
Kloy 1
Anything with a crease!
maphineRAWRS 10
1. How could you do anything with an armpit.. 2. Don't fml when you clearly agreed to it for it to happen haha