Today, my boyfriend and I were watching a movie and eating a burger. Feeling frisky, I sat up and took off my shirt. He looked at my chest, at his burger, then back at me and said, "Give me a minute, I don't want my food to get cold." FML
Collection
Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Same thing different taste
Kinky
Today, me and my boyfriend were fooling around on my bed when things started to get heated. I said to him, "Do what ever you want". He got up and said he'd be right back. I thought he went to get a condom. He came back with a sandwich. FML
Today, I was having sex with my fiancé when he stopped and said, "Boy, what I wouldn't give for a burger right now." FML
Today, my boyfriend and I ordered pizza and watched a movie. After dinner we started to make out. I began to take my clothes off when he stopped me. He said that sex is exercise and you can't exercise for 30 minutes after eating. FML
Hidden secret
Today, I was with my boyfriend. He got up, shut the blinds and turned around to say, "I don't usually shut the blinds, but no one can see this." Assuming we were going to have sex, I took my pants off. He asked me what I was doing, then sat down to eat an entire tub of ice cream. FML
Hangry for that Mickey D's
Today, I was in bed with my boyfriend, starting to get intimate with him, when one of his friends walked into the room, grabbed my leg, and pulled me onto the floor. His reason? He was hungry and wanted to go to McDonald's. FML
Today, I felt frisky, so I went over to my boyfriend's place, hoping to have some fun. I brought over a movie, and part-way through it, I started feeling him up. He responded by sighing, "That's really fucking annoying, babe. Cut it out, yeah?" FML
Hangry sex
Today, during sex, my boyfriend stopped and asked if he could eat a sandwich while we do it. FML
Smooth talker
Today, my boyfriend and I were out to eat. The waiter came and asked what we wanted. My boyfriend said he wanted a cheeseburger and I told the waiter I'd have the same. My boyfriend looked at me and said, "Are you sure you don't want a salad?" FML
Today, my fiancé and I were cuddling on the couch watching TV when we started kissing. As I crawled onto his lap and started to unzip his pants, he said, "You're blocking the TV." FML
The art of seduction
Today, I took a bath and dressed in a skimpy lingerie. I sat on the couch for an hour and a half before giving up and putting on my boyfriend's old t shirt. It was then that he decided to comment. On the t shirt I was wearing. FML
Top comments
Wheredidgrungego 12
We're men. We don't waste food.
lolmigosh 15
Talk about a yummy burger!
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (304)
devinmarketto 0
U should learn from my gf and u should have just attacked him
WolfHound8650 0
do not come between a man and his feast.....we will kill you!......after we eat
ronnieboo 0
Wud u rather he waste a perfect burger kuz he sho can't get full off of eating you out!!
failOmeter 0
Im a guy and i can honestly say if that were me id have droped the burger and ****** the hell out of that pussy then came back and re-heated it and finished eating
civilxslaughter 4
I agree with that guy. A burger, like a mind, is a terrible thing to waste.
RussianBabe 1
Lmao , my boyfriend would say the same ! Love him to death.
venomsix6 0
Man gotta eat :)
bradisawesome666 0
Smart guy
loganmarquez 3
Don't waste food.
FilthyPazuzu 3
There are times when it's not cool to expect sex, and if a couple is gonna be happy they BOTH have to learn when not to ask/imply/beg their partner for it.