Today, my bike abruptly stopped working, torpedoing me headfirst into the sidewalk. I lay there in agony for a few minutes, and the only guy who saw it happen said, "Lucky you didn't get hurt!" FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, as I was walking to work, a cyclist shot out of nowhere and slammed into me. I hit the ground hard and lay there in agony. The guy quickly dusted himself off, said "Sorry man. It's a vicious cycle." then chuckled at his own stupid pun and cycled away. FML
Today, I was riding my bike down a road I know is quite hazardous. Having almost been hit in the same spot the day before, I rode across the intersection very satisfied without having been injured. Until I crashed into the guy front of me and flipped over my handlebars. FML
Today, I accidentally hit a cyclist with my car. In panic, I jumped out of my car and ran up to him, who was lying on the floor, motionless. As I was about to check his pulse, he jumped up and shouted, "I bet you thought I was dead, asshole!" He then punched me in the face and cycled off. FML
Today, I was riding my bike home from the store. Wanting to impress some passers-by, I tried to do a trick on a sharp turn. I hit a pole with my balls. As I was lying on the ground in agony, a guy pulled over, took a picture, and took off laughing. FML
Today, while riding my bike on the sidewalk, I came across a ladder. To avoid bad luck, I swerved around it into the street. I got hit by a car. FML
Today, I was riding down a hill on my bike, doing a wheelie, when I lost control and started heading towards a woman on the sidewalk. Don't worry, I didn't hit her, the man beside her lunged and shoved my bike so hard that I hit concrete and broke three teeth. He then screamed, "Watch it, punk!" and walked off. FML
Today, I was texting while riding my bike (yes, I know, terrible idea). I crashed right into a lamppost, and, even worse, a woman walking by laughed and asked, "Did you just text yourself into that pole?" I just laid there hoping for the ground to swallow me up. FML
Today, I was riding my bike to work in a hurry and hit a pothole. I flew off and hit the ground hard. I was badly shaken, but an old lady came over, checked me out and helped me to my feet. After she left the scene, I realized she'd pickpocketed my wallet while "helping" me. FML
Today, I was riding my bike when I passed a derelict house that recently burned. Curious, I dismounted and went inside. I stepped on a nail, and while I was staggering in agony, I hit a weak spot in the floor and broke my other leg. FML
Today, I fell off my boyfriend's motorcycle. I had a few scrapes and bruises, and my boyfriend called for an ambulance as a precaution. The paramedics managed to drop me on my head. FML
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Top comments
amerwin 3
Is tequila your name or were you pedaling under the influence?
MrSassypants 34
hopefully wearing your helmet. There I finished your sentence.
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Comments (93)
ThorneCrossed 9
well good thing you didn't get the handlebars in innappropriate places. you don't want to be in that situation in public
A7X_LoVeee 10
Ah. Someone talks from experience.
ThorneCrossed 9
don't worry about it.
naybaybay17 0
My friend did that riding his bike home from work. he flew off his bike and while doing so he hit his ribs on the handle bars and the hit a car:(
larisonr 4
I don't think I want to be in that situation in private either.
flockz 20
do u use lube on your seatless unicycle? i prefer fire and ice when i ride.
thetrollyoulike 6
lube is not relevant when it comes to my seatless mountain bike and that bumpy road.
iAmScrubs 19
No lube for me. I am commonly referred to as the "Lubeless Wonder".
itsjustbanter 0
You should take a dose of man up ennit
Sub_Zero_is_God 13
what did he think you were doing?sleeping? Fyl
goshpeople 4
I've heard people say things like, "Good thing the ground was there to break your fall" and "Is the floor okay?" I suppose it's just their way of making light of the situation.
bg_416 0
hahaha that does suck
RokNRoll11 9
at least you brake an arm, like I did
Mrrevorp 0
on the bright side you have a slightly cool story of failure to tell about your scars and/or bruises