Today, my 5-year-old daughter was asked by her teacher to write a letter to each member of her family to read during the holidays. Her letter to me said, "Dear mommy, come on. You could have done better than dad." FML
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Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, I have been teaching my 5 year-old step-daughter how to read and write. She came bounding up to me with a piece of paper and said, "look what I did". It was a letter that said "My dad misses my real mommy, not you". FML
Today, I took a look at my 9-year-old daughter's diary, thinking it would be full of cute stuff. Instead, it was full of hateful rants against me and my husband, as well the boys at her school, who she called gay because none of them ever hit on her. It seems I've failed as a parent. FML
Today, my nineteen year-old daughter handed me a book on raising children and said, "Maybe you'll do better next time." FML
Today, I received two letters, one from my mom, the other from my dad, about how much they missed me with me not being around them. I called my mom, feeling sad. She didn't sound sad at all. She asked me which letter was better. My parents were competing each other which letter would be more moving. FML
Today, I learned that my 11 year-old daughter wrote a love letter to her teacher. Cute, right? It was an incredibly graphic letter where she asked him to "abduct her and chain her up in his basement." I now must find her a new school and a therapist. FML
Today, I got my dad to fill in a questionnaire my teacher handed out on Friday. One question said, "I would like to see my son/daughter ______." My dad wrote in the blank space: "Less often." FML
Today, my mother looked me dead in the face and said, "I have failed as a parent." FML
Today, I dressed up as Santa Claus for my employees' children. After seeing all the others, my daughter's turn arrived. She sat on my lap, put her lips to my ear, and whispered softly: "I want a new dad." FML
Today, I thought my mom and I could put aside our differences and open our Christmas presents. When she opened mine, she turned to my dad and said she didn't want the present, so I could give it to someone else. 'Tis the season. FML
Today, was parent appreciation day at my daughter's KG class. On the stage, each child was asked to define each parent in one word. When it was my daughter's turn, she looked at me hard, thinking. Finally, in the end she said, "My daddy is very fat." Everybody stared. FML
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Top comments
Steffi3 40
Atleast she thinks highly of you?
ActionFearo 39
All jokes aside, why'd she write this? Kids are pretty innocent and unless it was something she heard you or someone say, then there's a reason for it.
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Comments (53)
sthrnbell 9
Hahahaha
biebahood 15
I don't believe this.
edog55555 14
I believe you could have mom lol
20minutesto9 23
It may just be something she heard on tv and decided to repeat. After all, "attractive successful woman with an idiot husband" is a pretty common theme in sitcoms. It's possible she didn't really mean it or fully understand what she was saying.
marramrammar 2
Tell the little sh*t she would not exist w/o you! However, she overheard someone say it at her age
Drosophila82 18
But in your defence every - even mildly attractive - women married to a middle class man could do better.
fantasyworld 39
Did something happen that made her write that?
Val0 17
This child was born with no chill