Today, it took a whole half hour of scratching my head before I realized with horror that the weird tickling sensation I'd been feeling was actually a spider crawling around in my hair. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I woke up to something tickling me. Thinking it was my cat, I reached under the covers to give her a friendly scratch behind the ears. I imagine the giant spider that was actually there enjoyed my terrified screams. FML
Today, I saw a big, black spider on the floor of my bathroom. I promptly jumped up on the toilet seat, slipped off, and slammed my head against the wall. The best part? It was a tuft of my hair. FML
Today, while showering at my boyfriend's house early this morning, I saw a huge black spider on the wall. I'm allergic to spiders, so in my disorientation I ran out of the shower screaming, slipped, sprained my wrist, and bruised my tailbone. Turns out the spider was a clump of hair. My hair. FML
Today, I was relaxing in bed with an arm kind of behind my head, when I noticed a huge spider resting on my armpit. My sister said my screaming sounded like a "witch being burned to death" for all of 5 seconds before I realized the "spider" was just my armpit hair. FML
Today, despite years of paranoid checking, I forgot to check my towel for spiders after my shower. Two crawled onto me, and I'm pretty sure there's one somewhere in my hair. FML
Today, I was quietly having a bath when I felt something fall onto my shoulder blade. I glanced over my shoulder and saw what I thought were huge black spider legs. I screamed, completely hysterical, and I threw myself violently against a wall. It was my hair. FML
Today, while hiking, I walked face first into a spider web. Freaking out, I shook my hair out in case there was a spider. Later on in the day the spider fell from my hair into my food. FML
Today, I thought I had a stick stuck in my hair. A very pokey stick. That aggressively bit my face when I tried to get it out of my hair. It was a big ass spider. My face feels like it's been punched. FML
Today, I went to pull a nose hair out, only to end up pulling a spider out by its legs. FML
Today, I found the same spider which I had let live yesterday hidden in my bath towel. I didn't find it until it was smeared on my face. FML
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Top comments
tony1891 22
your spider senses need some work.
DocBastard 40
Considering the chance that the little ****** laid eggs in there, there's only one reasonable option: You must shave your head. Do it now.
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Comments (75)
Mattthechamp 11
Well, time to go bald
seemo82 19
well.. just try and jump out of the window to see if u can spread webs and start fighting crime
demonfacee 14
All you have to do is wash your hair throughly to make sure the spider didn't give birth and then kill it.
cmo333 10
I would set my hair on fire and just sit there and say "this is okay" over and over again
timmeeeee 10
Imagine you become spider man and shoot web from your head.
TealTesla 5
Now all you need is fingers like snakes and you'll be set for Halloween Town
XQuartzX 15
well, i won't be sleeping for the next 10 hours.
taylormarrie 6
are you sure it's not lice because one time when I was like in 3rd grade I thought I had one spider in my hair but it turns out it was a crap ton of lice
cheyannemaaarie 12
This has happened to me too.
skyeyez9 25
Pray it isnt a wolf spider. The female can carry hundreds of live babies on their abdomen.