By Jacqueline H'ghar - 30/07/2016 08:56 - New Zealand

Today, I missed my bus to the doctor's office for my scheduled pap test. I was so desperate, I called my deadbeat mom to ask for a ride. She said "Virgins don't need pap tests", laughed, then hung up on me. FML
I agree, your life sucks 15 789
You deserved it 1 115

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That's just fucked up. Whether you're a virgin or not, cancer is always something you need to check for, and your mom is a douche for not taking you. I hope you at least got there to get your test done.

Man what a dead beat bitch.

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Google is your friend.

Something you never want to experience.

If youre a guy, you dont need to worry about needing one. Like someone else.said, theres Google

It's a test for cervical cancer if I'm correct.

First you get a 12 pack of Pabst Beer, and torpedo them. Then if you wind up naked in the front yard you know your Pabst Beer was normal, and you can get in to Gyna Colleges!

#1- First you get a 12 pack of Pabst Beer and torpedo them. If you wake up naked in the front yard, then you passed the test, and your Pabst Beer is normal and you can go to Gyna Colleges!

#1- A Pabst test is when you torpedo a bunch of Pabst Beer and wind up naked in the front yard. You passed, and your Pabst Beer is normal. Now you can go to Gyna Colleges! (Yay!)

#1- First you torpedo a bunch of Pabst Beer. If you wind up naked in the front yard you passed, and your Pabst Beer is normal. Now you can go to Gyna Colleges! (Yay!)

To answer, what's a Pabst test? 1st you torpedo some Pabst Beer. If you wind up naked in the front yard you passed, and your Pabst Beer is normal. Now you can go to Gyna Colleges. (Yay!)

#1- 1st you torpedo some Pabst Beer. If you wind up naked in the front yard you passed the Pabst test, and your Pabst Beer is normal. Now you can get in to Gyna Colleges. (Yay!)

I think there's a glitch in the matrix...

A Pap Test, or Pap Smear, is a terrifying experience for all women aged 18 to 70 that have ever been sexually active. You have to get one a couple of years after you first become sexually active, and then you have to get one roughly every three years after that. Basically, they pry open the walls of the vagina with a speculum so that they can see the cervix, and then they shove a spatula or a brush up there to take a swab. They then test the cells for any abnormalities that might lead to cervical cancer. So OP must have already been fretting about the procedure, and then when she missed her bus and her deadbeat mother refused to help, I can only imagine she was borderline having a meltdown. Hence the FML. And don't you dare say she deserves it for missing her bus. Shit happens.

You're actually able to get Pap tests done before you turn 18 (where I'm from anyways) and they are not only for people who are sexually active nor do they only test for cervical cancer. They can also test for STDs and STIs as well

35, I do not find it "terrifying". I'm sure I was pretty nervous the first time around. And I've had some very inconsiderate and rough doctors make a specific appointment quite uncomfortable, even painful. For the most part though, my experience has been very different from your explanation. I certainly don't ENJOY having a pap smear, but it's just a procedure that has to be done and my doctor is quite gentle. He even heats the tools and gels and whatnot, and I appreciate that for sure!

39, I'm sure it's not that terrifying. The first time around I'm sure it's nerve wracking, but I know it's most likely not terrifying. I was just trying to convey some facts to a (presumed) male in a semi-humorous manner, hence exaggerated verbs such as "shove" and "pry". Sorry if I offended anyone, and I'm also sorry to hear that some of your experiences have been less than ideal.

36, Oh I see, that's quite interesting. I'm sure the guidelines vary across countries. Here in Australia, the Cancer Council recommends that "all women who have ever had sex should have a regular Pap test every two years from the ages of 18-20 to 70 years". They believe that since cervical cancer is so rare in those under 20, there's no need to start screening until you reach that rough age bracket or above. I honestly think it all depends on the person and the circumstances, but these are just the guidelines we are given. Apparently Australia has among the lowest rates of cervical cancer in the developed world though, so go us I guess.

We've also got the HPV vaccine for school aged girls which reduced the risks of cervical cancer.

49, Yes, I believe I got that in middle school. It's good.

You are literally too stupid to insult

Hopefully you have a close friend or your father can give you a ride, sorry your mom won't help you out

That's just fucked up. Whether you're a virgin or not, cancer is always something you need to check for, and your mom is a douche for not taking you. I hope you at least got there to get your test done.

Man what a dead beat bitch.

I'm so sorry. that's so wrong of her. Virgina do need pap tests too

How about Texas?

Or even West Virginia?

Well, being optimistic when it's hard to be, find any silver linings possible. Like, for example, now you won't feel obliged to pay for to live comfortably in her old age. You can just let her rot off the welfare system :)

According to my doctor, she's right. Unless you actually aren't a virgin and she was just trying to insulting you. Then that's just messed up.

Of course you need cervical smear it's to test for cancer and abnormalities you don't need to have had sex your doctor is wrong

I think it depends on the place and the specific doctor. In my country and according to my doctor, pap tests start 3yrs after a girl becomes sexually active, or at the age of 21 even if they haven't engaged in sexual activity and are still virgins, basically it's whatever comes first. Better safe than sorry, you can get cancer at any age.

If i got a pap smear done 3 tears after being sexually active i would have needed one at 16? Its not even covered by insurance until you're 21 here.

And because it's not covered my insurance, you don't need one?

Which is exactly why I said "in my country," to show it wouldn't be like this everywhere. Also, what do you mean by "here," because I live in Canada, where we have healthcare so tests like these are covered, but in the US, no, they may not be covered, but they still cost anywhere from $50-$200. Which for me is a lot better than the hundreds of thousands of dollars potentially needed to spend on cancer treatment, plus the immense pain. And so what if you would have been getting them at 16, just because you're young, you don't need them or something? You can still get cancer at that age, especially if you're sexually active, since you have a higher chance of contracting HPV. You're aren't immune to cervical cancer and HPV just because you're young.

My doc said you should start having paps once you start having periods. idk what the "rules" are though. My mom started taking me when I was 10 or 12 because he said that (I started menstruation at 10).

that's what I have always been told. Once you hit puberty you need to get them yearly.

Cancer doesn't discriminate it kills all.

Love NZ can't wait to visit there again!

Karma will gladly visit with checkbook in hand when she's growing old, lonley and decrepit.

That's bs, and your doctor is an ignorant bitch. Pap tests can be used to tell if you have cervical cancer. And regardless of if you needed one or not, she didn't need to be so rude.

I think you read the FML wrong. The OP's mother is the one being an ignorant bitch here. It says nothing about the doctor, only that the OP was going to one to get the pap test.

Who cares? She still didn't need to be rude.

Also I find it amusing that people are downvoting me just because I misread it. Nice to know no one understands that human beings make simple mistakes sometimes.

Ironically, I think the reason we're all downvoting you is because of the rudeness you displayed in your comment.