Today, it's my birthday. My dad came to pick me up, but after I had put my backpack in the back seat and closed the car door, he drove off without me. It started to rain, and I was without my phone or wallet. FML
Collection
Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, my parents and I went to the movies for my mom's birthday. After the movie, my mom and dad got into a fight, and left me at the movies. My cell phone was dead, and my house was about 12 miles away. They finally came and picked me up, hours later. FML
Today, my friend and I were getting picked up by his dad after a carnival. As I put my stuff in the back of the car and shut the door to walk around to get in the other side, his dad drove off, thinking I was in the car, leaving me to walk up their hill. It was midnight and I ended up lost. FML
Today, I got into an accident. As I was talking to a police officer about what happened, the tow truck driver managed to take my car and drive away, leaving me with no phone or wallet. I just spent an hour walking home in a hail storm. FML
Today, I was leaving a cafe with some of my friends. I had to sit in the back of the car by myself. I opened the door when I saw an old woman needing help getting to her car because it was raining. I shut the door and went to help. My friends thought I had gotten in. I was left in the rain with no phone. FML
Today, due to bad weather, my dad let me take his car to drive to my apartment 3 hours away. I only realized when I got there that my keys were still sitting on my parents' kitchen counter. FML
Today, my dad got extremely drunk, so I took away his car keys and left on foot. When I came back, I saw that he had broken down my door. Now my dad is mad at me for not giving him the keys when he was drunk, and I'm door-less. FML
Today, I was having my birthday party. My dad showed up late, blind drunk, and drove his car straight through my garage door. FML
Today, my dad came to pick me up. It would have been nicer if he'd had his clothes on. FML
Today, it's my birthday and my mom took me and some friends to an amusement park. Looking for a tampon, I found a phone in my mom's purse that I didn't recognize. Turns out my mom is cheating on my dad. Happy birthday to me, I guess. FML
Today, my father went missing. Naturally worried, we searched his workplace, hospitals, and other locations. Turns out he got arrested for driving around town drunk out of his mind. Oh, and it's my birthday. Thanks for throwing me a great (search) party, dad. FML
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Top comments
glenzhao2 16
Happy Birthday, you'll always be Daddy's little girl
Midrash 5
Wow.. Father of the year.
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Comments (89)
rockinroyalty 0
YDI AND FYL. Ever heard of getting in the car first. Then shove ur bookbag to the back or on the floor where ur feet is. Ydi for being a dumbass. And fyl for ur dad being a jerk.
leadman1989 16
Your dad doesn't dick around lmao. Next time he'll roll down the window and gave you hop in.
AznQin 3
But how did u write this lol
Angeon 5
Damn, yesterday was my birthday, and my twin sister never said happy birthday.
mandoalba 5
oooo dad burn
physicist48 0
I'm sorry. Your dad is either a total dick or total moron.
Partyman22 0
Why weren't your wallet and phone in your pockets??
Hald 10
That was the cheapest way he could give you a day you'll never forget..
HU4L188 0
Whata ******* dick! Sorry op :/
NBS93 0
Your country was once led by Alexander The Great. I'm sure you can get over it.