Today, it's my birthday. After a day out partying, I came home to find all my stuff smashed in the yard, even my 42" plasma TV. After asking my girlfriend what her problem was, she said a "slut" left a message on the machine stating how fun last night was. It turned out to be my mom. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Same thing different taste
Life is a roller coaster
Today, it's my birthday and my mom took me and some friends to an amusement park. Looking for a tampon, I found a phone in my mom's purse that I didn't recognize. Turns out my mom is cheating on my dad. Happy birthday to me, I guess. FML
Today, my girlfriend decided to treat me out to dinner and cake for my birthday. My mom felt left out and yelled at my girlfriend in an angry tirade. My girlfriend went home. I'm spending my birthday, alone in my room. FML
And I Oop
Today, my mom was screaming and throwing things at me and I didn’t know why. Then I checked the date. Her birthday was yesterday. FML
Today, I threw a party. My drunk boyfriend decided to bring my 50-inch flatscreen TV downstairs from our bedroom. The TV didn't make it. FML
Great timing
Today, I got dumped by my girlfriend at her mom's birthday party, in front of her whole family. They even got it on video. FML
Today, I got a laptop for my birthday. I was thrilled until I realized that my mom had given away my old one without asking. 6 years of games, music, and pictures down the drain. FML
Alanis Morissette reference
Today, my mom screamed at me to the point of tears, because it rained on her birthday. FML
Nice of you
Today, I threw a party at my girlfriend's house before her parents came home from vacation. After the party, I found all of her mom's favorite wine glasses broken. I spent $500 on new glasses, and wrote a huge apology for the party and the damage. She got home and told me that they were already broken. FML
Today, I was taking a nap while my mom was at work. I woke up when she came home and didn't think anything of it so I went back to sleep. When I woke up again, I went downstairs and our 52" plasma screen TV, my xbox 360, and $1500 computer were all stolen. I'm guessing that wasn't my mom. FML
Today, my parents and I went to the movies for my mom's birthday. After the movie, my mom and dad got into a fight, and left me at the movies. My cell phone was dead, and my house was about 12 miles away. They finally came and picked me up, hours later. FML
Top comments
simplyabsurd 0
I suggest ditching the psycho. A 42" plasma? I certainly hope she's going to buy you a new one. But my guess is she doesn't even have a job. Just because it has legs and talks doesn't mean it's worth dating.
deaditegirl 0
Well, now maybe you can get a girlfriend who is slightly less crazy...
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Comments (376)
FmlFtwAndISFU 0
WWWOOOOWWW i would have kicked her ass!!
dg72592_fml 0
wow ur girlfriend is nutttsssss what the ****??
yer_maw 1
Can one of the 661 people who said you deserved it please tell me why? It was her fault for freaking out #51 has it sussed mahn xD
Musikal 0
#196, it was clearly not a "guy's night," or else his mother would not have been there. It could, however have been a family thing, but the girlfriend should have also been informed if this was the case. You concluded nothing, only assumed.
Atreyu_Love 0
LMAO #8 "Just because it has legs and talks doesn't mean it's worth dating."
LeonardSnow 0
time to ditch the bithch...
Bunbu 8
You should sue her and make her buy you a new TV. Then kick her ******* psycho ass to the curb.
vicxxx 0
i think she has a little jelousy problem FHL instead!
Gatch_fml 0
3 Words...Cut a Bitch
Slyder_fml 0
#21 - Its people like you who would comfort this crazy chick, thus breeding the idea that this kind of reaction is acceptable. You disgust me. #166- You got it right (the possibilities about why he was with his mother rather then his gf) here is a female with her head on her shoulders (something all females should aspire to, and if you are already like that, then good on you!) As for the OP, I hope you made this up because if not then you have some pretty bad luck. I suggest not gambling. P.s. #21 perhaps you should seek professional help?