Today, it's my birthday. After a day out partying, I came home to find all my stuff smashed in the yard, even my 42" plasma TV. After asking my girlfriend what her problem was, she said a "slut" left a message on the machine stating how fun last night was. It turned out to be my mom. FML
Collection
Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, it's my birthday and my mom took me and some friends to an amusement park. Looking for a tampon, I found a phone in my mom's purse that I didn't recognize. Turns out my mom is cheating on my dad. Happy birthday to me, I guess. FML
Today, my girlfriend decided to treat me out to dinner and cake for my birthday. My mom felt left out and yelled at my girlfriend in an angry tirade. My girlfriend went home. I'm spending my birthday, alone in my room. FML
Today, my mom was screaming and throwing things at me and I didn’t know why. Then I checked the date. Her birthday was yesterday. FML
Today, I threw a party. My drunk boyfriend decided to bring my 50-inch flatscreen TV downstairs from our bedroom. The TV didn't make it. FML
Today, I got dumped by my girlfriend at her mom's birthday party, in front of her whole family. They even got it on video. FML
Today, I got a laptop for my birthday. I was thrilled until I realized that my mom had given away my old one without asking. 6 years of games, music, and pictures down the drain. FML
Today, my mom screamed at me to the point of tears, because it rained on her birthday. FML
Today, I threw a party at my girlfriend's house before her parents came home from vacation. After the party, I found all of her mom's favorite wine glasses broken. I spent $500 on new glasses, and wrote a huge apology for the party and the damage. She got home and told me that they were already broken. FML
Today, I was taking a nap while my mom was at work. I woke up when she came home and didn't think anything of it so I went back to sleep. When I woke up again, I went downstairs and our 52" plasma screen TV, my xbox 360, and $1500 computer were all stolen. I'm guessing that wasn't my mom. FML
Today, my parents and I went to the movies for my mom's birthday. After the movie, my mom and dad got into a fight, and left me at the movies. My cell phone was dead, and my house was about 12 miles away. They finally came and picked me up, hours later. FML
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Top comments
simplyabsurd 0
I suggest ditching the psycho. A 42" plasma? I certainly hope she's going to buy you a new one. But my guess is she doesn't even have a job. Just because it has legs and talks doesn't mean it's worth dating.
deaditegirl 0
Well, now maybe you can get a girlfriend who is slightly less crazy...
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Comments (376)
fcuk_fml 0
paranoid~ not worth it~
perfectwinds 0
Haha I like 158!! =P I'm a girl, and that bitch is PSYCHO! My ex had an ex like that (before me) and she used to break in and throw his shit around and break it then leave. That was hell while I was living with him. I kind of understand now, which is why he's also MY ex. But I'd never destroy personal property no matter HOW pissed I was. Everyone wondering why she didn't know his mom: Maybe they weren't there yet in their relationship. Maybe she couldn't go because of work or something like people have said. Meeting the parents is a big step for people out of HIGH SCHOOL. Maybe mom lives out of town and he went out just with her because he wanted mom-time on his birthday. He had a day out partying after a night with his mom and maybe planned a romantic night with his girl. Well... Until now.
bbq45 0
WTF! Now im affraid to get in a relationships LOL...
waxstigmata 0
make that psycho pay for it!
sciencenerd 0
Be happy that you found out how she can be before you got too involved with her (guessing you hadn't been together long since she couldn't recognize your Mom's voice.)
THC_fml 0
Wow... she should at least consulted you first before smashing your things :/
wbrycem 0
People! Maybe it was some mother/son time? Why is everyone so quick to jump to conclusions ... Either way, what a bitch, sue her ass
wbrycem 0
Life isn't a movie/music video. There are consequences for smashing up your boyfriend's shit in the real world.
QueenOfMelodrama 0
Wow, PSYCHO girlfriend much? Hope you broke up with her. Even if you HAD been out with another girl, destroying your property would NOT be the way to get back at you. Hope she reimburses you for everything.
Shizden 0
#7's got the right idea! Let's see... Braking and entering... Put some of the not broken stuff in her house and then that's possible theft... Harrassment, maybe? She did listen to your voicemail... Milk it for all you can get then SUE HER PSYCHO ASS!